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 Aug 2013 Pendragon
Kimberly
I remember,
When I was around,
Eight years old,
I witnessed my mother,
Sitting at the edge of your bed,
Crying.
I remember hiding behind the door,
Sinking to the floor,
Crying.
I knew you weren't getting any better.
I knew you were soon,
To leave this world.
As I watched my mother,
Fall to her knees,
Still crying,
I managed to see your,
Still, fragile, weak body,
And convinced,
My eight year old self,
That it was for the best.
I would ask you for a chance
Sure I'm not everything
Most girls want in a man
But I only want to make one thing
My ultimate goal
To make you happy
Finally put the blade down
Sleep for what feels a lifetime
I want to be your lifeline
Maybe I don't deserve you
Maybe I'm being overwhelming
I don't know
So...uhm...can I call you baby?
Can I ask you to give me a chance?
I only want it if you think I deserve it
I really like you
Ask me why, I dare you
I have no reason not too
For a girl I really like and hope I get the chance to please
 Aug 2013 Pendragon
-
Lie Of A Smile
 Aug 2013 Pendragon
-
Always at war with myself
Constantly self-loathing
Lacking in confidence
Blaming my problems
On everybody else
Shutting people out
Is what I'm best at
I'm **** at showing emotion
Although sometimes
My smile cracks
And my pain shows
In my sunken eyes

It's such a pain
Just waking up
Every day
I act like
I'm fine
When in reality
I'm far from
That state of mind
I hide my body
Except my face
So I can fool everyone
With that lie of a smile
That I always embrace
Even though my thoughts
Are always of suffocation
And painful death
No one would know
Because the pain I feel
I never show and tell any soul

I could be smiling so bright
As I'd constantly think
Of the ways I could die
I could laugh out loud
And think of those razor blades
That I'd love to use on my pale skin
But you'd never suspect me thinking of this
Because, there's a lie of a smile on my face

Constantly triggered, yes I am indeed
But that's something you'd never see
Because that's the part of me
That I hide away from every soul
The ones I love mean more to me
Than my own tragic self
© Natali Veronica 2013.
This room is full of blind eyes
As I sit
And listen to these sore excuses for lies.
I cry a couple tears, and cut myself a little deeper every time..
And
When you all see the cuts, you look at me like.. I've, committed some type of crime?
But it doesn't seem to matter to anybody.
Caring seems to be everyone's antibody.
But no matter how blind
Everyone else is always on my mind.
My parents, tell me to **** it up.
The people I trust, leave me.
And the only thing this ****** up world does for me is endlessly deceive me...
 Aug 2013 Pendragon
Àŧùl
That age,
This day,
The raid.
The laughter which vanished,
Those smiles which perished,
That area which suffered it...
That revenge,
This disease,
The harbour.
August 6, 1945: Hiroshima
August 9, 1945: Nagasaki
The 2nd World War got over,
But at what cost.
This cost?

My HP Poem #395
©Atul Kaushal
Long walks, sad talks. Forever dreams, sad as they seem. Bright smile, depressed style. Shining eyes, hidden behind long hair. Scared girl, mad dad.

You cant leave her out. Don't shut anyone out.

Funny girl, dark secrets. Arms covered in scars. Face covered in bruises. Hidden with makeup.

Long lies, short excuses. Struggling girl, successful man, coming to take her hand. Long nights, short time.

She struggles from the trauma.

Long fights, short nights. Cut even shorter.  

She tried and tried to breathe. But he was just too strong.

Long fight, takes flight. Another angel up in heaven tonight...
Cares tons loaded
up
in a tipper of worries
discharged.
 Aug 2013 Pendragon
-
I am the woman of your dreams
You are the lover of the night
But there's something about you
Something I just can't describe

I just don't know anymore
Am I losing my sense of mind?
I've just never felt this before
Your love has made me blind

Not as strong as I once thought
Because now, I'm in love
With the man
I only wanted
To ******
I guess love
Truly bites
When you
Find the
**One
© Natali Veronica 2013.
 Aug 2013 Pendragon
phantasmal
red
 Aug 2013 Pendragon
phantasmal
red
the rivers flow with viscous blood
your anger stains the flood
you string your bow with sorrow
and release it with an arrow
your eyes are blinded by passion
of a regret with no reason
they are tinted glass prisms
drowning in delirium
you're losing all your bets
yet you can't ask why
because in a world of sunsets
its color douses the sky

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