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my demons are sitting right beside me
and i'm scared
oh god i'm scared
i haven't seen them this close in awhile
just breathe
i can't drown again
just breathe!
they're saying all these terrible things to me
please don't cry
i can't breathe
you're okay!
i don't want to be depressed again
please save me
 Oct 2018 Noni Winters
I’m coffin in a yard of graves. Like often but now dark and strange. The cost of when I start to change, is lost wits and a heart of rage.
With practice came a new routine. A habit made for you to leave. In fact it saved the few you need, from havin to stray and loosin me.
So every night I rose to dred. And wake alive in rows of dead. Then weak and weathered I’d find my way home. To piece together the night now unknown.
This poem is actually a true story I used to really do this when I drank a lot as a young man
 Oct 2018 Noni Winters
 Oct 2018 Noni Winters
We gather today to mourn a deatrh.
And after we pray we're sadder at best.
In pastures we lay, no laughter is left.
No masters of fate, so faster to stress.

The group of my people that I keep at bay........
All choose to use needles and likely cant change.
The truth sounds so evil with feasible rage.
I see them as equals but leave open space.

~I find myself angry when my help isn't saving.
Im too self indulgent and noticed I'm crazy.
I hold them in closeness but no sense is saving.
I wrote this promote fits of coldness and craving.
 Oct 2018 Noni Winters
An End
 Oct 2018 Noni Winters
Invited up
on boards creakier than my bones

Steps lead me to heaven, to hell- no, just an end

And you
my dear friend
have misplaced the rope

No matter, pull my heart strings once again, darling, you know the way

Love is a nuisance.

Vacant space of what used to be now gives way for busy hands.

bend and break, mend and splice.
Now fasten it well, and fasten it tight

Before my feet fell, my final thought:
A recollection of our days together.

"Love is a nuis-"
 Oct 2018 Noni Winters
What is the burning in your chest
But your heart outgrowing its cage

Or the resilience in clenched fists,
Your coming of age

Through mistakes the universe says "you're getting in the way."

But undeterred you take a seat, and promise, "I'm here to stay."
 Oct 2018 Noni Winters
Sweet Gravity

For you I've fallen

At first resisting

But now in passive descent
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