It's diff for everybody..
but to me the exposure and my influences got me comfortable with the **** body.

As dancer or mover
  I have high regard for the body, specially my own body.

I learned to connect and be aware of own body,
every part, every cell of it.

Always drawn to the lines and shapes that the body creates
how it tells a story and express emotion.


When I got into figure sketching community,
I was able to be sketch human figure and all the more I got expose to the **** body.

All the more I appreciate it and take it as it with no malice or awkwardness.

Taking it as it is, as raw and natural it is.
Then the real beauty of it rise.

Do you remember
It is the same feeling of being trapped
Do you remember
Everything is coming back

The heat, the smell of it
Every single senses from it
It is haunting me
Yet I can't say a word to describe it

It is dark, gloomy and sad
What is it?
How come I can't play the game?
All I wanted is to escape!

Why am I still here?
I know I have kept running
I never stopped
But I can't see the light

I have been running
But all along my eyes are blind folded
There's no way I can see the light
There's no way

Not even if I open my eyes
I will always be trapped
With the same senses and darkness
Not letting any light in

It is the game I always play
It is a maze of my own
I created my own trap
And it is all in my head!

If I start the words
Will it let me catch the emotions
If you see a post
Probably seeking for attention
Then I'll be fine by a validation

Still I am lost
And I can't hear my words
Drifted somewhere
Myself is not here
Allow me to rush
I need it now

I close my eyes
To escape from the same walls
I open them
Because today
I just need to be okay

Your absence is too loud
Too loud that it distracts me
The distraction is consuming me
Consuming my energy

Please **** the silence
Speak, say something
I have been waiting
Every bits of time, I check

What is beyond this box?
I stare at it  just in case I catch you
By the time I have come back
Oh yes, you've seen it?!

My stories are waiting
And so are my questions
Should I live with your mysteries?
Or should I pour in the emotions?

In case you don't know
Your silence is already killing me
Don't let me wait for too long
This heart can only survive for a time

I don't really work at 5pm

I don't work I just stare
I don't work I just watch

I watch the sun from a far
I stare at it until it finally goes down

It is perfect from afar!
Lovely to look at.

So distant, yet I still fall in love
Can't even feel its warmth

I don't really work at 5pm
Cause all I do is think of you..

I am facing the world
It mirrors myself
While outside it is pouring
Then I breathe this question

In circles, went three-sixty
Stated my name
One two --twenty-five years
Now counting my existence

Still a long way to go
It takes courage to move forward
Tiny steps wont hurt
Darling, trust me you are doing.. just fine

May every waiting reveal its worth
That all goodbyes equates to healing
Every time we sink in pain
Our souls are being shaped
Which was never realized by yesterday

Every waiting will sure come to an end
One day you'll say
I'm ready to cross the waiting line
Finally, I get to see whatever is the prize
Now dare to conquer tomorrow

Surely every wound closes
Together memories haunt you
Nevertheless a new you is born
Witness how it will form a trace
Yet today, at least try to rise

In the end, waiting and healing will become one

*Nawa'y ang lahat ng pag-aantay ay may saysay
Lahat ng pagpapaalam ay may tumbas na paghilom
Pagkatao ang nahuhubog sa tuwing sa sakit nalulunod
Kailan man 'di ito nababatid ng kahapon

Matatapos din ang lahat ng pag-aantay
Isang araw sasabihin ****
Handa ka nang humakbang
Tuklasin ang kung anong supresa ang naka antabay
Ano pa't hamakin mo ang bukas

Magsasara rin ang lahat ng sugat
Patuloy na magmumulto ang mga alaala
Ngunit ang bagong ikaw ang siguradong magpapakilala
Masdan mo ang maidudulot nitong mga marka
Ngunit ngayon bumangon ka

Sa huli, ang pag-aantay at ang paghilom ay magiging isa