Sometimes I want to delete
the poems I wrote when I was
full of romance.
But that would be cruel,
to erase beautiful words
simply out of anger.
So I leave them where they are.

I didn’t realize
that the door was closing
until it slammed in my face
and left me sitting in cold silence.

Nights like this are a curse.

The tide has crashed
over my head—

I had my back turned,
I thought I was safe
but I was wrong.

I’m drowning,
flailing,
unsure of which way is up.

Everything is hitting me
all at once.

I was fine an hour ago.
I was fine.
I was.

But the tide doesn’t care.

Moonlight shimmering
on the diamond snow

Lamplight piercing
a teardrop

A chest buzzing with
emotions unknown

I cannot close my eyes
for I am stuck here

I can’t focus, I can’t think,
I can’t hear anything over

The ringing in my ears—
when did that start?

I just want to sleep but
there’s too much noise

In the silence of post midnight
as I lie alone with emptiness

Filling my soul and numbing
my heart again, no, why

Must this happen now when
I need to be strong for

The future and the now and
the hope of better things

I inhale stale breath and
exhale false dreams

I lie in a nest of sorrow
and the feathers of broken wings

I would love to try and fly
but the world holds me back

So I lie here trapped under
Plath’s bell jar, suffocating

Let me breathe, let me love,
let me be warm again

******,
I can’t hold on to anything

Everyone keeps running away,
leaving me to suffer—

No wonder I’m so scared
of being left behind

Where am I even going?
I can’t see my future

I can’t remember my past,
everything is different now.

1:19 am.
I should be sleeping but instead
I’m letting the words fly out
of my head.

And suddenly
everything is crowding
in my head
And I’m a mess again
just like I always
will be
And I wish that
all these demons
would just go away.

If someone closes a door on you,
do not idle in front of the door
and weep.
Instead, turn around
and find a new door.