I never thought that I’ll fall in love with you again and again...
But time proved me wrong again and again...
I don’t remember when I first fell in love with you...
But I do remember all the other times I fell in love with you...
I thought I couldn’t love you more...
But I fell in love with you again and again...
When you said that you loves for the first time...
I couldn’t help but fall for you again...
When I saw you in your wedding dress...
When I saw you with our bundle of joys....
When you’re playing with our kids...
When you give your ur warm smile...
When you gently  squeezed my arms to get me calm...
And especially now...
How you’re snuggling against me...
As if you’re not warmed enough...
When the rain is pouring down...
I couldn’t help but kiss your forehead...
When you woke up and gave the beautiful smile...
And your eyes reflecting the love for me...
I fell for you again...
Let me make a promise to you, that...
I’ll fall for you again a and again...
— Jonna Adam

Hai Rain!!!
You have been pouring out for few days....
Is it bcoz you found some who loves to get drenched...
Like I have been pouring my muses through writings....
Or is it because you are pouring out your sadness...
Like I have been letting out my sadness through writings...
As we are alike...
Let’s have a date...
If you pour out of happiness...
I’ll get drenched and dance with you...
If you pour out of sadness...
I’ll sit with you getting drenched and  
Letting my tears down for you...

— Jonna Adam

Does it matter to anyone what I feels...
I don’t know when I stopped to feel...
Some may feel I’m cold and distant...
I won’t show my weakness...
It’s a decision I made...
They thought that I’m emotional less....
My mom asked once... can’t you cry ... to make it better...
But I was hardened by the betrayals...
I was not ready to cry...
But they didn’t know that I was crying inside....

They never thought of me when their ***** hands touched me...
They never thought of me as a kid...
Who knows nothing other than that you are family...

When I started to realise the wrongness...
Years has passed...
I was afraid...
I didn’t know what to feel...

I started to hate myself...
I thought feelings are for the purest...
As I have become dirtiest...
I thought love is not for me...
I couldn’t found the courage to love...

I got married to you...
You didn’t know that I cried...
When we first made love...
I thought it was my fate...
There were so many nights
Where you made me feel
That I m nothing more than this...

And still I started to love you...
Only to know that you are having an affair...
You don’t know how much it broke my heart...
We fought... but in the end it was all my fault...

That’s when I started to harden my heart again...
To never expect anything from you...
I’m still with you...
But my heart...
It doesn’t belongs to anyone...

I’ll live... l’ll smile...
But in the end I know I’m alone...

So my feelings... it doesn’t matter...
Because I forgot to feel ...

Friendship is something we all cherish...
It’s definition changes from one to other...
Some may say it’s one who know you well...
Some may say it’s being for you in your happiness and sadness...
Some may say who supports you...
Some may say who love you for what you are...
Some may say where you can be yourself...
Some may say who will never hurt you...
But the truth is can we find all these in person...
I don’t know...
After all we are humans...
And err is human...

So I will say I don’t believe in best friends...
It doesn’t matter if your friends don’t know your favourite colour...
You favourite film...
Or song... Or person...
What matters is they are with you as they can...
Bcoz some will comfort...
Some will cry with you...
Some will make you smile...
Some will hug you.. .

And I do have my share of friends...
Who all are special to me in different ways...
There is one who made me realise even we can sit in silence...
And be there for each other...
One who made realise you can talk about anything if you are comfortable...
One who made me accept my painful past...
One who reads all I wrote and supports me...
One who calls me occasionally to just ask how I am...

I’ll say they are my past, present and future...
They made me strong...
They made me enjoy life ....
So all my friends....
I love you all for being there for me...

I m not Deaf nor Mute...
But I have become one...
Bcoz of you...
I’m not accusing you...
But merely stating the facts...

There were times when I needed you most...
To talk... and to listen...
But you were too busy with your own worries,
You didn’t saw mine...
So I stopped talking and listening...
By the time you felt something is off...
It was far beyond to break ...
You thought I m depressed...
You got me help...
But what you didn’t know is that,
I never talked...
I took all the pills they have given...
And started to smile...

You may think I’m selfish...
And never listen to you...
But I think it’s better to be at the end of your angry self...
Than seeing you broken...
Or to think that you failed me...
Now I feel relieved that we didn’t talked...
You can continue without any regrets...
After all why do we need to make everyone suffer...
If little bit of silence make everything OK!!!

— Jonna Adam

I thought of not writing...
But when your face came to my mind...
It slowly began to flow through...
I know you won’t say anything...
If I didn’t write...
But I want to write for you...
May be because you are the reason I started writing...
There were times where I couldn’t write a single line...
But to know that you enjoyed my writings...
Boost my ego...
May be that’s what I required to write again and again...
I don’t know what you concluded from my stories...
As I said it’s all twisted truth...
Which you need to read between lines...
You encouraged me  and teased me...
You gave me the space I needed...
By not asking anything...
But being there....
And you made your way to my heart...
Which is already broken so many times...
You can see a lot of regrets and sorrows there....
And happiness too...
I hope you will accept the same with your whole heart...
My friend...
As I m giving you a corner of my heart...
That you can call your own...

You were my companion in my loneliness...
You were my friend and teacher...
You silently woke me up from my depression...

You taught me about life...
I m what I m because of you...
You taught me to forgive and forget...
You walked with me in silence...
You never judged me...
You took me to journeys of happiness, love, revenge, acceptance...
You taught me motherhood is wonderful...

Do you remember our days...
I’ll always have you with me...
I slept holding you...
You broke the silence and loneliness of night...
You waited with me for the Sleep to embrace me...
You made me dream again...
To smile again...
To love myself...

How I used to immersed in you... forgetting everything...
I loved to sit with you in dim candle light...
The sounds of crickets and gentle breeze become the rhythm...
And how I will turn ur pages one by one...
And the way I held you to my heart after finishing it...

And then one day I had to leave you...
Not because I wanted to...
But I had company....
And years passed by...
I see you waiting for me to touch you...
To run my fingers through you...
To smell you...
To open up you...
But my friend I forgot how to do so...
My passion for you died away...
You don’t know how many times I reached out for you...
To start again...

I know you will never complain...
But one day I’ll come back to you...
To resume  the journey we begun...
Till then wait for me...
My dear Books