The two words that automatically come to
my mind when I see you: Imperfectly Perfect.
The way your eyes light up when you're excited,
the way you smile like a 5 year old when you're happy,
the way you roll your eyes and then secretly smile when I tease you,
the way you try to act annoyed with me but end up laughing,
the way you dance when you're hyper,
the way you show me the peace sign at random times,
the way you talk, some times like a tantrum throwing little 6 year old,
the way you're so stubborn,
the way you order me around.
the way you understand me so perfectly,
the way you hug me,
the way you add a "Maybe" after thanking someone,
and the way you do so many other things.

It's adorable how you're shy at the most unneeded times,
and how you're careful about the decisions you make,
and how you and I have a similar perspective,
it's like you know exactly what you want, and how you want it.

Standing over here and looking back, I feel so blessed.
Having you as my best friend is something I never thought was possible.
If only you saw yourself through my eyes,
you'd realize just how amazing you are.
Thank you for being there for me and pulling me through hard times,
I'll always be here for you, the same way you've always been there for me.

I could write a million songs about your skin
How the beauty and softness resembles your soul
I could sing a song about your smile
How it  carries the story of your past and your dreams for the future
I could dance to the sound of your voice
The melody of your every word runs through my body like a river untamed
I could love you forever
You are my seed to the tree of love and peace
I could kiss you for eternity
Hoping my affection would help you grow

There's a knot in my stomach,
I don't know what to do.
At this point, your silence is
deliberate.
Your absence is a message.
I want to reach out, but I can't.
No.
It must be you.

And so, I sit and I wait.
For what, I don't know.
A sign, a signal, some
semblance of your existence,
a peek of your thoughts, an
arrangement of your words into
a sentence to form some sort of
sentiment
towards me.

I don't know
what, exactly, I am waiting for.
And I worry, I worry so
I put pen to paper and paper
to fire to destroy my thoughts.
I obsess and I regret those things
I said; I'm sorry.

But **** it, you know?
I can't let you go unless
you let me go, so
I sit and imagine
you already have.
Talking to another, in love
with another, in bed with another.
It can't possibly be true, you wouldn't.
I know this.

But these thoughts torture me.
What does it all mean?
Where is the meaning?
Is this what you wanted?
It's fair, if you do.
I just want to know what
to do so I wait.
I wait.
While my thoughts turn my
stomach to knots.
I wait.

that crescent moon
of a smile
needless to say
it reached up your eyes
and down your throat
along your pounding breast
jangled currents bolts shocks waves
across the marrow of your heart

and then it crept sleekly
inside your gut
gravity defying stunts
and it lifted with an urgency so delightful
your restlful restless brain stem

I leave you hints all the **** time
I'm ******* sitting over here by myself
Close to where you are
Just so you'll see me
Why don't you come sit next to me
Talk to me for ***** sake
I want you to notice me
I feel so stupid for trying
An I really that invisible?
It ****** me off how you can ignore me
Why can't I be like that to you?
I'm tired of giving and not receiving
I make myself lonely for you
I lost everyone to be with you
You act like you don't care
This **** is tearing me apart
Do you realize that?
I'm so sick of you
I hate you and want you at the same time
I want you to say something
Be rude to me
Yell at me
Say something
I can't take being invisible anymore
I only want your eyes to see
What I've been saving for you
Do you understand what you're doing
I'll never be the same
I need you
I need to get away from you
I need to break this attachment
Cure this obsession
This isnt healthy
You aren't healthy
For me



I'm ******* done.