i want to be angry
i wish i was
i reflect on times past
the tattoos on my mind
rosy colors and laughter and love
scales unbalanced by red and blue
with flaming currents of vibrance
i ignore violet’s truth

i wish i was angry
i want to be
the scratches and scars
on my soul and my arms
ripped apart by your nails
and promises broken
less black, less white
violet sure must be right

but like the morning
my heart beats blue
i don’t condemn you
for your choices and sins
i remember an angel
and forget the shadows cast
i pray my memories of you
will turn violet at last

obsessive
compulsive
thoughts that don't belong
intrusive
elusive
intrinsically wrong

ocd

unstable
unable
harm your bone and skin
fearful
tearful
tattoos of your sins

ocd
ocd

aggressive
possessive
words not meant but said
irritated
isolated
dreams not gone but dead

ocd
ocd
ocd

nothing to see
nowhere to go
waiting forever
minutes pass slow
embers turn cinder
lost all glow
wild lemon trees
stunted growth
grey advances
head to toe
numbing depression
etched below

alone
alone i come
alone i pass
alone i walk this road
like i always have.

you met somebody troublesome
someone with cracks and scars
you see beyond and internalize
that they’re your other half.

you tend to their pain, it’s violent
there’s darkness that consumes
you inject them with the light you have
but now you’re broken too.

you worked to build your other half
you stayed up day and night
you gave them wings to levitate
and strength to push and fight.

you molded them into something new
a flower standing proud
you constructed someone fireproof
who speaks their mind aloud.

your work is done, you’re satisfied
an artist’s grand hooray
you made them legs to stand on
yet now they walk away.

you lost yourself in your piece of art
the clock hits midnight twelve
the sculpture you built shines marbly bright
but you have cracked yourself.

Shadows of rainbows in the night sky
Crimson clouds bleeding nocturnal tears
Heavenly angels drop like holy rain
As smoke swallows moonlit terrain
The fires of war are feasting
On the victims of contested domain

As the dead rise
And the living suffer their last breath
Masked shadows dance
Unbothered in the face of death

They sing
And shout
And cry
For they know
When the clouds pass
Dawn is nigh.

False promises of the rising sun
With a libation of blood
The unity of the divine
Search for a successor
As the eye of Horus
Lost sight of the sky

In pursuit of enlivening the afterlife
The Atef crown was deprived of its shine.

who's got brown hair that blows in the wind
who's got a split tongue and tattoos of their sins
who's got a bright smile that splits suns to their core
who's got the fortuitous gift to drift sailors ashore

el diablo
el diablo

who's got brown eyes that twinkle and shine
who's got a fiery cage that traps and confines
who's got a presence so warm it emanates spells
who sits on a throne in the temples of hell

el diablo
el diablo

I look back at our past
And see the devil’s footprints in the sand
Violent waves have washed away
The tears I shed
While all you did
Was sharpen your horns

With the skull on your scepter
You turned my head like an owl
My love was a gentle candle
And you made the fire spread
I am engulfed by venomous flames
And all I see is red.

Poems emerge from the darkest of moments
Never have I seen someone so happy they write
I only sit down and think of these words
On nights and days when it hurts

Poems exist as a means to cope
With pain so intense it grants inspiration
The greatest of poets lived the worst of lives
But a pen and a paper aren’t enough to survive.