Stranger living in this
world all alone

I know your journey
Is strenuous
Long

But don't ask me to
And please don't call

Just keep on walking
Ramble on

Maybe to disassociate
Is the only way
"Like maybe that's alright
Maybe it's okay"

But
Then it all hits you at once
Speeding bullet subway train

Your body has been void for years
Your organs have already melted, rotted, and withered
away

And when that happens
There's no going back

You wake up in the morning
Every morning
and
Instead of brusing your teeth
You look in the mirror and ask yourself

Who the **** am I?

And your brain goes empty

So.
utterly.
*******.
bleak.

Peculiar and particular
Is how many describe my taste
For if you are not
Perfect
You are a ******* waste.

The white hare smiles.
It smiles with the smile that a girl ought to smile.
The hare is fast enough to outrun it's predators,

I am not.

And even then, sometimes the fastest hare is caught.


White becomes pink
Pink becomes red


These are the colors of my brain splattered on the plastered
wall.

The hare is alive.

I am dead.

Life is just a theory
Every break through
Every thought and idea
Every problem and solution
It changes
We don't know
Until we know
So I will forever never believe
The "truth"

Shatter that glitter
Dark blue glass
Christmas bulb
And I'll pray they all go out
All at once
Leaving eyes blind as they should be
Blind as you should be
Sitting there with your nothing
Muttering to yourself in the pitch
Saying something about how I don't understand
And
something about how I lie
If you were awake
at least half as awake as you say you are
It wouldn't take so long to pull the sleep out of your eye
It wouldn't take so long
even in the dark
to see

You were created from
nothing

Born
Into a world
Where people believe you need
Something

To
Be
Happy.

Her body was made of frosted glass
You could see all of her muscles and tendons working inside in perfect unison like clock gears
when she breathed or
smiled

Somehow

This made you believe she was human

I don't have much of a picture to paint

You think I'll never be enough
Because I can't relate

Artists have been famous for much less

Because sometimes it's the simple ones that are the

Best

My doctor asks me
"how are you feeling?"
From one to ten
"Are you depressed?"
"Are you happy?"
"Is this the end?"

I say
"I am not sure how I am feeling, but today the sky is a dark despondent stormy cloud gray and this could be the end or the beginning of something new."

I'm never sure how I feel anymore since I've fallen in love with you

They serve me cold liquid imitation eggs for breakfast
And my mattress is solid plastic
I am only allowed outside at certain times
There are no windows so patients cannot
escape
We're all on suicide watch
When the night gets late

The girl next to me asks me if I want a demon
To be my friend

I already have one.

And

This

is the end.

You and I
Me and you
we all keep going
living our lives
believing everyone in the world are
like night and day
but believing this
I do suppose
makes us
same.

You have never loved
me

You never will love
Me

Yet

I will always love
You

Rip off the mask
To see what’s underneath

Not a woman or a man
Who am I, if I am not me?

Floating abyss surrounding
Fleeting moments abounding
I’ll look into the mirror again
So long until my face changes shape

Here I wait
For my reflection to scream back my name
(but it never does)

Is my body just a shell for my brain?
Empty and hollow and vain?
Pin ****** Pain
Ugly
     Horrid
             fat and lame

No one shall see me
For I am no one also

And no one could be me
But I never thought so