Maybe to disassociate
Is the only way
"Like maybe that's alright
Maybe it's okay"

But
Then it all hits you at once
Speeding bullet subway train

Your body has been void for years
Your organs have already melted, rotted, and withered
away

And when that happens
There's no going back

You wake up in the morning
Every morning
and
Instead of brusing your teeth
You look in the mirror and ask yourself

Who the **** am I?

And your brain goes empty

So.
utterly.
*******.
bleak.