You are a liar
not a poet, he said,
and your feelings
are as meaningful
as an invitation
made in September,
that new year bliss
that covers you in
new notebooks,
fresh pencils and
friends. If you could
only love a person
as much

if you could only
love me

Am I beautiful enough?
For the wicked and the ******
To live without care
To meet expectations force-fed unto me

Am I beautiful enough?
To walk the hall and make jaws drop
To tempt Adam and live in Eden
To bring the Archangel to his knees

Am I beautiful enough?
To be in magazine spreads
To see my body in Times Square
To make all women turn green

Am I beautiful enough?
So intelligence does not matter
To be in the eye of the beholder
To be loved
*To be free

you look in the mirror and you see something putrid, you look away with disgust, you back away, you look down and you use it.
you do not cry out, you don't scream, you don't fall, or trip, or
hesitate,
you just use it.
and then you feel it,
you feel that emptiness release your body,
you let it consume you entirely,
you don't flee,
or run to ,
you just stay,
you don't regret and you don't think what if?
you
finally you feel better
relieved,
then your sense comes back, and your freedom disappears,
runs away like a little girl from a scary nightmare,
and without your consent it returns,
but
the marks remain,
the evidence of your release shouts loudly to their eyes,
to all their eyes,
so you wonder what if
the person standing right next to you or walking a few feet away has done the same exact thing?
used the same escape?
what
if
they did exactly what you fantasized about just a few minutes ago?
and
you
were to blind to see?
to deaf to hear?
to ignorant to realize?
to selfish to try to even look through their wall?

I will conquer you.
I will watch and learn and figure you out.
Sometimes it’ll take a while
But I’m going to slam and slam
Put my pencil down
Push you out
From the depths of my minds
The deepest wrinkles in my brain

And then free them into you
When I slam down
The poem will last
The length it wants to last
I’m going to figure you out
Slam poetry
Watch out

Here’s the thing
I’m not pulling away
But I don’t even want to stay
How do you live
How do you die
How do you make your life useful
What am I even going to write

I’ll let you go
Set you free
Pull ideas out from all around me
And when I’m done
I want to have won
Because you’ve judged my face
And what it displays
But you haven’t actually judged me

You go by what you hear.
You let their ideas and lies
Infuse into your mind
And that’s all you want to believe
You think you’re so right
With your opinionated minds
Just because someone told you
This who’s who and what’s what
This is the TRUTH
Of a small town
But really we’re made of a bunch of lies

Slam Poetry
Set me free
Let my horse out of the gate
I’m ready to start this race
Just let me escape.
Right here, right now.

So I’ll put it down
Get it out.
But first, teach me how.

Slam poetry,
Fight off my ways
Say what you want to say.
I’ll conquer you.
One day.
Don’t you wait

I’ll take what words I know
And endue them with life
Reveal my broken mind
From these hands as I write
Have I got a stanza
Am I getting this right?

Slam poetry,
Your mystery surrounds me
And I am here to show you
That I will solve you
Each time I tap this page
With a new idea or word
Or even phrase.

Slam poetry,
Here I am
Greeting you now
Don’t just watch me
Listen as the words come out

What am I saying
How is this going
Why can’t I contain this
There’s something deep inside
And I’m too weak to fight

I’m drowning in myself
******* in water and exhaling air
Slam poetry what is going on
Are you driving me crazy.

Stop avoiding my glance
At every single chance
Look into my eyes
And tell me
I’ve got this one thing
Right