I don’t want this I don’t want to live I don’t want to be sober I don’t want to be clean I don’t want to be responsible I don’t want to take care of myself
I want to destroy myself I want to get out of my head I want to make the room spin I want to starve I want to drown I want to bleed
I can’t enjoy my life I can’t live I can’t even suffer right
I might take a lot of medication before the night is over...
I hate that in all my dreams and fantasies I’m someone else, I hate that I believe for me to be happy I need to be someone else, I hate that i feel like I can only have you if I’m someone else.
Hard truth, self love is harder than it’s made to be.