I'm a concoction of emotions
digging my own grave

I back away from desired eyes
to avoid the shame and hurt
when my core's been exposed

Will this cycle of
remaining a prisoner 
of my own heart
ever come to an end

Perhaps I wasn't 
meant to be loved at all
but beautifully resilient 
on my own

I feel so alone
isolated from my own
mind and heart

Two beings at constant war 
I just want to feel normal
despite knowing I'd never be

A battle I'd forever be a part of
and I'm simply petrified
an ache in my heart
that'll never be mended

But I will love myself
most of all, cherish those I love
give every cell of my being 
to the few of those who truly see me, 
love me, and accept me
in all that I am and ever can be

Seeping through
freedom with just a blink of an eye
wipsing through the air
up into the sky
becoming one with the clouds above

Birds circling around the
invisible aura of light
that this universe beholds

Enchanted by this lullaby
of simplicity
it soothes my core
in knowing it's all right
to be where I am right now

One leaf at a time
we'll turn it
at our own pace

Reminding ourselves
that we aren't alone

The burning desire
to live, grow,
and flourish just as you are

Let that guide you,
being your own protector
and advocate,
far into the horizon

Where the
shadows dissipate
and dreams come to life

Feelings of you
created by you
swirl within my heart

And all I can feel is
wholehearted trust for you
and within myself

It feels as if the past
has been shattered into oblivion
nothing else truly matters
but to give all I have to you
I vow to give you every part of me
heart and soul
concocted into who I am

A person still shackled to her past,
but also a person full of compassion and awe,
she’d set your world alight.

You’ve giving me the courage to trust again
and how you make me feel—
this trust I have for you
may forever be ineffable

I guess in the end, it is true
that mastering the mind takes
maybe a lifetime

But even this is alright
because what's important is
this time we take to grow and
be generous to ourselves

We deserve the love
we give too easily,
so willingly,
once trust feels like
it's been formed,
back to ourselves

In fact, we may deserve it the most
but this is difficult to see
or understand
since we are all far too used
to giving more to others
than to ourselves

If only people knew
that we all carried the same fears,
the fear of being
disliked or rejected,
that we all just want to
have a sense of belonging

Maybe then, this world we live in
wouldn't have to feel so beak
or like its always against us at times

I sabotage myself
because of all this hurt
because I fear no one
will love me ever again

And if they do
it will only be temporary
they will view me as
a burden eventually

I am only a stepping stone for others
who don’t want to
get to know the real
vulnerable yet selfless me

All I hope
is for a better beginning
in the long run