No matter how cold I shower,
I can't freeze my thoughts

No matter how hot,
I can't chase them out

No matter how hard I scrub, it's stll my skin,
that I am living in

inhale
exhale
bathing in fresh air

the midsummer breeze
the cold winters bite

I'd listen in to my neighbours
an ear pressed against the wall
for hours.
Shivering, cold
my back arched
trying to get closer.

Just to feel something.

When I look in the mirror
I see
pathetic
It's me
I'm pathetic

Your lips my lips,
apocalypse.
.
Is that my thought or just another song lyric?
.
If all the thoughts have been made before
all the actions been taken
walked down every road
.
Am I even my own person
or just a replicant,
an open transmitter broadcasating?

Why is it so hard in this world
to find yourself valued and respected,
loved even

when you are trying so hard to be kind
to keep smiling
and not become bitter?

I'd rather leave it unfinished
take it easy
crack a joke
than to mess it up and watch me fail

again