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Brother Jimmy Feb 2016
I came across a piece of paper from 2013, when Charlotte was five. I had jotted this down:

"New word Charlotte made up:
Orsificant (adj.) Both smart AND wise"

I still like the sound of that word.

And God, how I wish I were orsificant.
Brother Jimmy Feb 2016
Old men are just depraved, we find,

There is nothing that I could

Have done to stop his sick old mind

From ruining the neighborhood



Parties that we once thought fun

Must now cease, it’s understood

Stay away the sick’s begun

Stay away for your own good



Grandfather-like he welcomed in

Little children, unawares

Rousing himself from his sleep

Oversight of vacant stares



Maybe it was just because

His brain was simply overtired

But slyly with unnerving jaws

His twisted mind became inspired



And snap, he tried to clamp them shut

On one so innocent and young

She dodged the trap and in her gut

It felt like she’d just been stung



Repeatedly she’s made to tell

Each tittle till the record's straight

She’s told forgiveness is the way

To handle his untoward state



And I stood idly by back then

A selfish little punk was I,

‘Only wished it hadn’t been

For my own serving each July



Enlightening it was to me

The sugar-coating thus removed

The world’s a cesspool, I can see

Monsters are real, it’s been proved



What’s more, oh sad epiphany,

The foul force within that man,

Exists a smidgeon deep in me,

Though full expulsion is the plan



It’s extant in the meat and bones

But I have yet to comprehend

Why that which speaks in dulcet tones

With animal-weakness can’t contend
Brother Jimmy Feb 2016
Fundamentally selfish
Consumed with my own problems
I put on a face of concern

For him and her and them
When you speak, I am waiting
For my turn

Making sounds that create the illusion
Of interest
Keeping eye contact
So you think I care

Aware of my body language
Avoiding tells

Skills I'm employing, I learned on stage
Oh, yes...and...
...adding flavor to the conversation

Because you're not doing it right
It is trite - you've lost my interest
I don't have time for this
Brother Jimmy Jan 2016
Listen,

When I start speaking to you
In that authoritative way,
When I'm raving and ranting,
Don't heed what I say
If I give you advice,
As if I know "truth",
My mouth spewing *******,
So very uncouth,
And I bluster and babble,
Like I know this place,
I want you to slap me smack dab in the face.
Brother Jimmy Jan 2016
====~~€>

He's almost burned out,

The pathetic lout...

He's probably shortened his life

By years

But hold on

Sit tight

For through this dark night

Smoldering inside

In depths nigh unreachable

There’s a little leftover orange that glows

When the bellows blows
Brother Jimmy Dec 2015
Sometimes you will
Try the mask on
No fun, no thrill
Not a bit fun

Feeling foolish while
Shaking their hands
But ...you do it
Anyway, and

Soon…you start
           to feel the part…for real.
The zealot’s zeal, …the urge to kneel...

Show me which are truths and lies
Show me what’s behind those skies
Tell me what I need to know
Lead me where I ought to go

Just help me get to a place
…where this mask
becomes my face.

I’m
Playing this part
Desperate to find
Under the art
Between the lines

The man I am,
A fraction of you,
¿Fact or scam?
Confusion all through
Brother Jimmy Dec 2015
All of these feelings
Are too much for me to bear

What do I teach them
When my own true faith is fear

Will it be real for them
If it isn’t so for me

What do I teach them
For their souls to be set free?


    The beginning of wisdom
     Is
    The fear of the Lord
    Is
    The beginning of wisdom
    Is
    The fear of the Lord
     is...

Search through your bookshelves
For the bits that make it clear

Pity the poor boy
He doesn’t have the faith to hear

Grant me your wisdom
He is shouting at the dawn

Are you still with me?
How could I have gone so wrong?

~•~

I’m done with wishing
Done with the guilt in which I drown

I am contortion
Trying to keep my breakfast down

If you can hear me
Then let me gaze upon your face

Or let my angels
Escape the tragic fall from grace


     The beginning of wisdom?


Grace is not due me
That quality you give unearned

Is what confused me
In fits and starts the torrents churned

The less I notice
The more I feel I’ll make it through

Age is not wisdom
As I went on the less I knew
(Song)
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