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Cut
AyySeEs Feb 2017
Cut
One...Two...Three...Four
watch the blood drip down on the floor
looking at her savior, the trusty blade
that comes each time she wants the pain to go away

She looked at her arm and saw the cuts she made
the numb feeling she longed for began to fade
looking in the mirror at her own reflection
what she saw was ugliness, weakness, less than perfection

In one swift motion she grabbed her blade and sliced
Five...Six...
her eyes were transfixed
then she got the feeling again
Seven....Eight...
they were full of such hate
with cuts so deep
she let out a small weep

she couldn't believe this is what it came to
In the back of her mind she knew what she had to do
Nine.....Ten...
Here's to hoping that this is the end.....
AyySeEs Mar 2017
Standing there by her side
watching the tears leave her eyes
All of the emotions shes ever felt
Being a widowed mother was the new had she was dealt

Watching her from the opposite side if the room
Not knowing how to feel let alone what to do
Listening as she begged and pleaded with God to let him stay
This was the one thing that wont go her way

The amount of sorrow and grief shown on her face
Even though she knew he was in a better place
The tears she cried for days on end
Knowing that her heart will never be whole again
AyySeEs Apr 2017
No one prepares you for how much you cry
or the pain that you feel inside.
They never tell you how to cope or how to feel,
all they tell you is that the pain you feel is real.

To be told that you have to say goodbye,
thats enough hurt to last for a life time.
The nurse comes in stone faced and emotionless,
then hands you papers and says 'Here sign this'

Do you know how much it hurts inside
to wake your brothers in the middle of the night
just to tell them its time to say goodbye.
Those were the hardest words I have ever had to say
since that day I have never been the same.

You never know what to say or do,
until something like this happens to you,
The pain you see on their face or in their eyes
is a memory that lasts a lifetime.
AyySeEs Oct 2017
Theres a one of a kind love that comes from a mother,
you can look in the world but you won't find another.
Her love for you begins at conception
she will always love you through life's ups and downs without exception.

But then one day I just had to ask,
'What makes a mothers love for her child last?'
Is it when she puts her child's needs before her own
or is it when she gives her child her all even if it means leaving her none.

A mother is your best friend and parent wrapped together,
To help you grow into a better person.
She will always be there to wipe the tears from your eyes,
and to let you know that everything will be alright.
AyySeEs Sep 2017
Who am I?
Am I what everyone says I am?
Am I Vindictive?
A User?
Some Unlovable person?
Even Condescending?
Am I such a terrible person that this is what I'm labeled as?
This cant be all that I am.

I Know that I am...
A Quiet person,
A Book-nerd,
Even a Secret Romantic,
And an Aspiring Writer.
This is who I am and more.

Who I am isn't solely determined by what everyone says,
Its determined by what and who I am already.

I know that I am a Daughter, a Sister, a Niece, a Cousin, and a Friend,
Most importantly I am who I am til the very end.

— The End —