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Q Dec 2013
I used to do it slow
Drag the knife like a violin bow
Just to see my blood
Spill out the way it should

slices in lowercase
BLOOD pours in caps
pAiN is togglecase
CaLm is toggled opposite

I used to feel spite
Nipping at my heart day and night
But then I found the knife
And everything was alright

slices in lowercase
BLOOD pours in caps
pAiN is togglecase
CaLm is toggled opposite

I used to be so good
Better than any child ever could
And then the pAiN found me
So dense, it is, I cannot see

slices in lowercase
BLOOD pours in caps
pAiN is togglecase
CaLm is toggled opposite

I used to write letters
And hope they'd know me better
When I finally left this world
Ripped free like an oyster's pearl

slices in lowercase
BLOOD pours in caps
pAiN is togglecase
CaLm is toggled opposite

I'm a different person now.
I'm no longer in pAiN
I'm living in apathy
In ever-constant rain

Slices are merely cuts
And blood is nothing big
Pain is simply life
And calm is nonexistent

The method behind the madness
Always shows in the end
I cut my arms to see my blood,
Feel the pain and realize I'm alive again.
Thomas Dec 2014
My wits toggled from this injured and betrayed woman to the Infidels
The pagan **** on the left flank of the one on the woman advanced
It ended quickly as I brandished my long sword and decapitated him
The man on the right had enough time to grip the hilt of his yataghan
I eviscerated his gut with my short rapier as he looked in astonishment
The man in the core remained; had his way for the last time on earth

The worst of the three had occasion to make ready with his scimitar
This soldier froze at the sight of my face and looked in fear, “Al Thom”
A sobriquet by the Saracens is legend and foe Sir Thomas de Charney
His fear turned to anger as he knew deaths door was at his very feet
Coming at me in rage I brachiated my legs at his shins and felled him
Laid on sward, unable to riposte, confidence winnowed, he still lived

Pulling him up on his ****, I forced his eyes to the girl [nun] a last time
Then I whispered to him in Arabic “Remember her face forever in Hell”
I put the man out of his misery with blade through his throat, ‘farewell’
As I stood up I ordered my sergeant to inquiry on the others and report
My mind was spinning as I turned to her; I advanced with foreboding
Protected all my life, women are what Father told me were so beautiful

Trembling and barely covered I took my surcoat and covered her body
Her head was down but I saw multiple bruises; she had been ravaged
She lifted her face; I froze, but in a muddle was able to ask her name
Looking through me with piercing blue eyes.... “my name is Dagung”
Though sternly contused, her skin looked pale and as soft as pure satin
Her lips were full, beyond nocturnal dreams my ***** became ruttish

Stunned and bemused I recovered, no glozing; could hardly breathe
With thanks my sergeant appeared, gave report; Ludd was now secure
I ordered 30 knights to stay on until the morrow with standard orders
Assistants and physicians remained to afford the townsfolk provisions
One physician tended to Dagung as the hovel’s fire was being damped
The remaining knights were to return to Gaza with me immediately

Haste we must to assemble additional assaults as our enemy has noted
Approaching my horse I heard a high pitched voice of a young lass
I turned, already clothed in a ragamuffin type frock was Dagung:

Dagung:    Please my lord, may I come with you?
Sir Thomas:    Ba-ba-uh, My Lady, I can’t

She was clearly an English girl, could not been more than 15 years old
“I’m sorry my lady” as I mounted my horse, I watched her walk back
Cued, “Men, let’s move it”, with alacrity we made way back to Gaza
About 10 minutes later I heard sounds of hoofs rushing close behind us
It was Dagung on horse catching up to make way with me back to Gaza
My thoughts were- my life was about to change;   I then broke a smile
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~­~~
To be continued
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
This series eventually ties in or parallels The Time Machine series.  Thanks for taking your valuable time to read this.    Thomas
There is nothing like the moment of transition,
From the flickering interior
Of the place I work –
Where reality itself
Seems as though it could be toggled
In a single motion,
Deactivated at the flip of a light-switch labeled:
‘Warning: don’t turn off!’ –
And out, unexpectedly,
Into the prehistoric empire
Of the thunderstorm,
Where despite the growing import
Of an industry of explanations,
The emperor still retains
His wild anthropic breath:
The air that sparks
These eerie, contra-zoom effects,
Whereby the colours of the world draw close,
But meaning sinks
To strange electric depths.
Written whilst working at Marks & Spencer in the U.K.
L Thor Pedersen Jan 2017
I traverse the twilight to be discovered,
endless days-searching a complex caliginous maze,
-the sky held my heart and the stars were my lovers,
each moment unique, some more than others,
you must breathe your first truly FREE breath and release,
exhale all the sorrow,
all the anger,
and all of the grief,-you’ve bottled up beneath,
-you must find within yourself a tranquil repose,
the indulgent overpass,
it’s ocean blue fingertips reach and drip, overcome,
-ill equipped, yet somehow you saw hope,
in the midst of all of this-I barely exist,
-cant you see inside how I’ve been broke?!?
deprived of my air supply,-I lost my way and became a ghost,
grey gallows, shadows and silver lit shallows,
from the bowels of my imagination into reality,
a pen and a bottle, a door and a key, some speed and a throttle,
-tantric models,-terror toggled and set free,
just let it go, simply let it be,
for four thousand days I’ve wandered this place amongst the masses of the cold and broken hearted,
I’ve learned 2 love as if it were my very last day-
I remember to laugh,
I recall how to play-
so when this body dies and my flesh and soul have parted,
all that will remain, is the memory of my name-
but my actions will echo in a world from which I’ve long since departed,
i’ll blind my future-and drown the sounds of the past-
ill escape to a place
-where I might feel safe,
ill run away…..
to the indulgent overpass.
(c)
Chloe Oct 2017
I am the good in every good-bye.

Hands held.
touched
felt
printed

Grabbed my heart and toggled it back into its hiding spot.
where it dribbled between the truth and heartache
it sits in a cave.

Etched with small moments and diamonds.
and when I try to dust off the ash,
to let the shimmer of the gem come through,

it reminds me of you.

But it is the greatest good you’ll ever know,
a diamond.
To wear it, hold it, feel it, stamp your lips into it.

It is dangerous.
To fall for a diamond too bright for you, but pure enough to let you look.

The greatest good in the hardest good-bye,
how does it feel to lose your riches, and dig in coal mines,

searching for the diamond you left at your doorstep.

-I will always be sorry for what could’ve been, but never sorry for what has happened
-Chloe Aldecoa
To retract and look back for what you left alone, it is suffering in the finest way. Knowing what you had, what you cherished, has vanished. And you're left wondering why you ever let go.
Wk kortas Sep 2017
We’d make the journey, Hannibal-esque in nature,
Either on foot (even on the most dogged of the dog days
When the antidiluvian tar on our side street would bubble up,
Causing our sneakers to make a rhythmic flik-wump
Until we reached those byways deemed worthy of asphalt)
Or in ones and twos on our bicycles,
Our locks, assuming we were not the wards of parents
Who were devotees of the shorn-to-the-skull “summer cut”,
Flying unencumbered in the breeze
As we paid occasional fealty to the rules of the road,
Our destination being the “variety store”
Shoe-horned into one of the narrow storefronts
On our unprepossessing main drag,
A cacophony of canned goods
And candy bars of uncertain vintages,
Novelty pens and girlie mags two-thirds obscured
In jerry-built wooden shelves toggled together
By some former paramour of the frowzy divorcee
Serving as empress of this nickel-and-dime principality.
We coughed up our dimes, hoarded and guarded
With the feigned nonchalance of royal Beefeaters,
In the procurement of Cokes, handfuls of Bazooka,
And always but always trim foil packs of baseball cards,
Which we’d unwrap breathlessly, greedily, hungrily,
Hoping our efforts would unearth an Aaron, a Mays, a Clemente,
But usually our reward would be some utility infielder,
Some second-tier relief pitcher or third-string catcher
Cards perniciously reeking of stale gum,
And one particular summer it seemed every pack
Contained the card of Larry ******* Burchart,
Clad in his full Indians uniform,
Smiling at some untarnished future
Just this side of the horizon, fully visible and all but realized.
At some point, we moved beyond banana bikes and baseball cards
(Our attention turning to pursuits more expansive and expensive)
Giving up children’s things and boys’ games and fanciful dreams)
And looking back, it seems that the smile on that baseball card,
(Ubiquitous as cockroaches at the time,
Now mourned for its absence)
Was more than a touch on the wan side,
That apparition in the distance undefined and indeterminate
Malignant in its very uncertainty.
Larry Burchart's Major League Baseball career consisted of 29 appearances as a pitcher for the 1969 Cleveland Indians.  In those twenty-nine games, the Indians compiled a record of no wins and twenty-nine losses.  There is a life lesson in there somewhere, but  I would caution against looking too deeply into it.
John Prophet Jun 2020
Different.
Things are
different.
Like never
before.
Connections.
Like never
before.
Technology
weaving
through.
Touching all.
Like never
before.
Reverberating.
Coursing
through minds.
Influencing,
controlling,
altering perception.
Never be the
same.
Control tightening.
Grabbing the
mind,
the soul.
Forcing
compliance.
Subtlety
forcing
compliance.
Global influence.
Global control.
Tightening its
grip.
Levers of
control
toggled.
Toggled
by the
few.
Awesome power
like never
before.
Compliant
sheep.
Compliant
herd.
Like never
before!
Everything became it
and it became me
and toggled between matter and gi

— The End —