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Auroleus  Sep 2012
Remix
Auroleus Sep 2012
It's Like, I don't care about nothin man...

sigh

I was gonna clean my room, but I'm too depressed...
I was gonna get up and find the broom but I'm such a mess...
my room is still messed up and I know why
why man?
  because I'm depressed
  because I'm depressed
  because I'm depressed...

sigh

I was gonna go to class but I'm so depressed...
I coulda cheated and I coulda passed but I'm such a mess.
I am taking it next semester and I know why,
why man?
  because I'm depressed
  because I'm depressed
  because I'm depressed...

sigh

I was gonna go to work but I'm too depressed
I just got a new promotion but I'm such a mess
now I've got a rope and I know why
why man?
  because I'm depressed
  because I'm depressed
  because I'm depressed...

sigh

I was gonna go to court but I'm so depressed
I was gonna pay my child support but I'm such a mess
they took my whole paycheck and I know why
why man?
  because I'm depressed
  because I'm depressed
  because I'm depressed...

sigh

I was gonna make love to you but I'm too depressed
I was gonna eat yo ***** too but I'm such a mess
now I'm jacking off and I know why,
why man?
  because I'm depressed
  because I'm depressed
  because I'm depressed...

sigh

I messed up my entire life because I'm depressed
I lost my kids and wife because I'm depressed
now I'm sleeping on the sidewalk and I know why
why man?
  because I'm depressed
  because I'm depressed
  because I'm depressed...

sigh

I'm gonna stop singing this song because I'm depressed
I'm singing this whole thing wrong because I'm depressed
and if I dont sell one copy I know why
why man?
  cause after this verse
  I'll be in a hearse
  cause I'm so depressed...

*sigh
My car broke down today.
I am depressed.

I tried to get it up the hill, but it could not make it.
I am depressed.

I could not sell anything at work today.
I am depressed.

I am on the pursuit of happiness.
And I am depressed.

I am torn between two paths.
And I am depressed.

I'm listening to those same sad songs.
And I am so depressed.

I feel like vomiting and ******* and crying.
Oh yes, I am depressed.

I couldn't find what it was to be happy.
I have been so depressed.

I'm writing this with my eyes closed now.
It makes me a little less depressed.

I could only find a void.
I stayed quite depressed.

When I laughed it even reached my eyes for a while,
but underneath, unbeknownst even to me I remained
very depressed.

I thought I could determine my own emotions,
What a fool I've been, depressed.

Tryed to find my self worth hidden somewhere,
There are no values when you are depressed.

I'm remembering different me's,
but I don't know anything, depressed.

Where will I go from here,
I don't care, just let me be, depressed.

Oh I may never change,
I may always be,
depressed.
Patrick McCombs Oct 2017
You know you’re depressed when you watch an ad for depression medication and think hey that sounds like me
You know you’re depressed when sweatpants make up a large portion of your wardrobe
You know you’re depressed when people tell you just to try harder or to just be happy
You know you’re depressed when you take naps all the time just because it's easier than being awake
You know you’re depressed if you cry at episodes of Star Trek The Next Generation
You know you’re depressed when you have to pretend to be excited
You know you’re depressed when you feel overwhelmed and you haven’t done anything that day
You know you’re depressed when it’s 3am
You know you’re depressed if people know and keep trying to interact with you
You know you’re depressed if you have chemical imbalance in your brain
You know you’re depressed when you can’t bother to make actual dinner so you just eat oreos and call it a day
You know you’re depressed when netflix asks if you’re still watching
You know you’re depressed when your friends call and you don’t respond
You know you’re depressed when you just want to stop
jeffrey robin Mar 2015
isn't that a person is depressed

THE PROBLEM IS THAT DEPRESSION KILLS

AND THAT THE DEPRESSED PERSON IS DYING

/////

)(                                   )(
(                                   <^>                                   )
^
////  • ||
<>
                           )
              #####
             / \        /\

~~~~~~~

if you are willing to take COMPLETE RESPONSIBILITY
for the healing of the depressed person

Please do so

If not .... Get out of the way

///

As all religions
All philosophies
All sacred teachings

State ( in some way )

There is a Power
A Logos

A reasoning essence
At the heart of creation

In the beginning was the Word ( logos )
And the Word ( logos ) was with God
And the Word ( logos ) was God

::::::::

And Jesus was the Word  ( logos ) made flesh

//////

Now
I am not a Christian nor a bible thumper

And I am only using these terms because most of us
Are familiar with them

••

The creation itself is being described as a movement of
Pure reason ( logic )

Moving in the direction of the creation of pure man

With ( like the immune system of the body )

A BUILT IN healing mechanism ( Jesus )

That can be activated by MERE DECISION

( he who had ears to hear
Let him hear )

So
If you listen to the Word
The very act of listening

( triggered by your decision to listen / to hear )

Will reveal unto you a path toward healing

And an awakening notion of your true IDENTITY
and the truth that you were created

Out of LOVE
As LOVE
feeling LOVE

for the sake of LOVE

but !!

IT IS A CONSCIOUS DECISION
THAT MUST BE MADE TO EMBRACE THIS WORD

/////

This is as simple as I can express it in the absence of
Any feedback on the subject

••

Now

When I offered this simple truth to a depressed person
On this site I was roundly condemned

The gist of the complaint was that by offering advice
Concerning the depression

That I was violating her sacred right to be depressed
And to express her depression

I was told that

NO ! LIFE IS NOT OF THIS LOGOS

LIFE IS IRRATIONAL !

LIFE ( logos )
Is just something or other doing nothing in
Particular

Just ( you know ) something we gotta just put
Up with

Suffer thru and then we die

( THE VERY THOUGHT THAT CAUSES
ONE TO BE DEPRESSED ! )

and that she had written a poem she should be proud of

And we are all depressed

So ( hey !)

Let's all be depressed together !!

••

Now ( obviously )
NO ONE ACTUALLY SAID THIS

IN THESE WORDS !

But that's what they said

///////

And of course the depressed girl agreed with them

//

Now
I would say

The depressed girl was over -whelmed by the

Unity of the lies and the liars

And ...... (?)

And what ?

Now believes the best that can happen is that

Sometimes she will feel less depressed

And all her " friends "

Will continue to writes praises for her expressed depression

••

NO ONE ELSE EVEN SUGGESTED ANY SOLUTION

BUT STUBBORNLY MAINTAINED THAT THERE IS NO
SOLUTION

THAT THERE IS NO SPIRITUAL POWER

THAT NO DECISION ON HER PART CAN
CHANGE HER EXPERIENCE

THAT ANYONE WHO CARES ENOUGH
TO ATTEMPT TO CURE THE PERSON
IS TRYING TO CONTROL HER

THAT LITTLE

TOOTSIE -  GOOD - SHOES

Expressions of solidarity in the pain

Are the best she can get

And these good souls who are telling her

IT'S ALL RIGHT TO BE DEPRESSED
IT'S NOT A DANGEROUS CONDITION

JUST TRUST US !
WE KNOW !

Do know

••

So I end as I began

DO YOU TAKE FULL RESPONSIBILITY
FOR YOUR STATEMENTS ?

if so // good

If not // get out of the way

  •

I am not preaching god or religion

But I must say

( with absolutely no anger
But with heart felt concern )

That to deny the healing power

That to divert one from the understanding
Of this power

Is bad karma

REALLY BAD KARMA
Where Shelter Jul 2018
People who are experiencing depression use different words than people who are not



By Elizabeth Bernstein
June 11, 2018 9:33 a.m. ET

Feeling down? Pay attention to your language.

Language changes significantly in both content and word choice in people who are depressed, according to a growing body of research using computer programs to analyze speech and writing. People who are depressed tend to use the pronoun “I” more, indicating a greater focus on self. They also use “absolute” words like “must,” “completely,” “should” or “always,” reflecting an overly black-or-white outlook.

Scientists have long known that people change how they speak when they are depressed—their speech becomes lower, more monotone and more labored, with more stops, starts and pauses. But newer studies, including several published this year, have found differences in the actual words depressed people use.

People who are depressed “don’t see subtleties, and we can see this in the words they use,” says James W. Pennebaker, professor of psychology at the University of Texas at Austin, who studies how language relates to a person’s psychological state.

The study of computer-assisted language analysis for depression is still a nascent field, but apps and other technology that track language could eventually help doctors and patients identify a depressive episode more quickly. Since there are no biological markers for depression as there are for cancer and other diseases, therapists currently have to rely on a patient’s self-reported symptoms and on their own analysis to diagnose the disorder. Both can be highly subjective. The apparent suicides of designer Kate ***** and chef Anthony Bourdain last week underscore just how challenging it can be to identify and treat depression.

How to Talk With Your Dying Loved One

Conversations about death are among the most important, and difficult, we may ever have. Too often, we avoid them, Elizabeth Bernstein writes.



In research published online in March in the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, researchers at the Universities of Arizona, Zurich and Texas, as well as Michigan State and Georgia Southern, gave questionnaires designed to measure depression to more than 4,700 people at six labs in the U.S. and Germany. Participants were asked to write about their lives, a recent relationship breakup, their level of satisfaction with life, or just their general thoughts and feelings. Then software analyzed their language. The results: In addition to using more negative, or sad, words, people who were depressed used more first-person pronouns or “I-talk” than people who were not depressed.

Pronouns show where a person is focusing attention, says Dr. Pennebaker, who is an author on the study. Someone who is really interested in another person will use the third person “he” or “she.” Someone closely focused on a relationship will use “we.” “But if you are thinking about yourself—if you are more self-conscious or self-aware, as depressed people are—you will use the first-person singular ‘I’ or ‘me,’” Dr. Pennebaker says.

Depressed people also tend to view the world in a concrete, black-or-white way, using words such as “must,” “completely,” “should” or “always” that express absolutist thinking, as shown in a series of three studies published together in Clinical Psychological Science in January.

The researchers, from the University of Reading in the U.K., used software to calculate the percentage of absolutist words used in messages by approximately 6,400 members of internet forums for depression, anxiety, suicidal ideation and a host of control forums. They found that approximately 1.5% of words used by people in the depression and anxiety forums were absolutist—which was 50% more than those used by people in the control forums. The percentage was even higher for people in the suicidal ideation forums: about 1.8%.

Why are absolutist words so bad? People often don’t realize they are using them, and they can amp up negative thoughts. (Think about having your barbecue rained out. Saying “this always happens” is a much harsher thought than “sometimes the weather is unpredictable in June.”) Absolutist words also require that the world correspond to your view. (“I must get that promotion.” “My children must behave.”) “If the world doesn’t adhere to what you demand of it, that is when depression and anxiety set in,” says Mohammed Al-Mosaiwi, a Ph.D. candidate in psychology at the University of Reading and lead author on the studies. The more flexible you are, the better, he says.

Psychologists say people can use language as a tool to help them reframe their thoughts. “Very often, what you say is what you internalize,” says Mr. Al-Mosaiwi. Here are some tips:

Remember that the actual words you say matter, not just the thoughts they convey. Even if you are unable to replace negative words with positive ones, try replacing them with more accurate neutral ones. Instead of: “This party is horrible,” try “This event is not for me.”

Banish absolutes, especially in relation to your goals or relationships, where falling short of your expectations can be particularly depressing. These words and phrases include: always, never, nothing, must, every, totally, completely, constantly, entirely, all, definitely, full and one-hundred percent. Replace them with nuance. Instead of: “I can never catch a break,” try “Sometimes things don’t work out.”

Write. Keep a journal. Try a stream-of-consciousness writing exercise. Compose an email to a friend. Then analyze what words you are using. Are they too negative or absolutist? All about you? Tweak those sentences—and stay vigilant for those words in your speech.

Ask a loved one to help you identify absolutist or negative words or sentences and suggest reframing. It is easier to notice someone else’s language than our own.

Create a mantra you can use to override absolutist language. So instead of saying “This always happens to me,” say “This time. This happened this time.”

Put your mantra on sticky notes and place them where you can see them. Make it your screen saver. Have a needlepoint pillow made.

Pay attention to your use of the word “I.” If most of your sentences have “I” or “me” in them, you are probably too self-focused, says Dr. Pennebaker.
epictails Aug 2015
So today, I just had some sort of epiphany. It's weird because I get these sort of things when I am in the weirdest places. And that weird place for me is inside a plane. Near the window seat, not quite ,but the soft sunlight hits me in the right way and I feel pleased.  I had coffee before I boarded so it had the effect I needed to behave quite cheerfully. Oddly enough today I did not go through my all too familiar episodes of inability to function normally, submerge jn a lake of hopelessness or just hate everything and anything all at once. Though to be quite fair my stomach feels strange again maybe be cause of the cold drink I had or the influence of feeling panic every single morning (an uncontrollable fear that usually starts before I get depressed, I may add) or maybe both. It's so amusing how my mind works to be honest. I started observing people in the plane, the ones beside me and the ones who are going back and forth to stow their stuff or whatever.  Then this sudden thought about my depression laced my mind like a orange streak during sunset. I thought exactly this "Hey I don't feel so sad or miserable despite of barely having an hour of sleep after the tedious packing last night. This is good—this is great." And I just found it strange because there were times when I longed for the tide of melancholy—that despicable depression every time I am in the normal mood. At first, I was almost certain I have gone insane. Or totally depressed. Or both. I mean who wants to be ******* depressed all the time and then go through emotional calm and then the ******* cycle recycles itself like trash made to look pretty but when consumed gets to become trash again. Who ******* does? But I also realized I must have come to this sense of familiarity with the pain that drove me to the edge for almost a month now. It really becomes your home when you lose sense of yourself and the only thing comforting you is that very pain which have wrecked your home.

And all too suddenly, these thoughts just made me half hysterical half teary-eyed. Because at that moment as I waited for the plane to ******* trace the runway already ( I get impatient, yes) I felt grateful. The word really is grateful. Not even happy, delirious or euphoric. Just a hell lot of gratefulness. I find myself thanking this moment of just grasping happiness even if I know for sure I'll probably get depressed tonight again (as per usual). Before I'd get hyper and just laugh like there is nobody to mind me but I never felt this thankful ever. I started looking back to those moments of happiness where I get to believe in greater things again. Where I'd worry for a second then dismiss it saying "Ah this hardly matters, so ***** it." After being drenched in so much unexplainable pain and going through this high and low almost everyday, I've come to a conclusion that I never really appreciated those moments of peaceful glee as much as I am at that moment. And I thought hat could have never been possible if I wasn't crying myself for nights, being vulnerable and seemingly weak to a bunch of people, admitting to myself that I was losing interest in life itself. It was like going through a warzone unarmed but after the trail has left the danger, you start feeling a wave of relief—a recovery after the storm.

When I started accepting the fact that I am a person with a high tendency to get depressed, I also came to accept that I've always been a sensitive person. It hardly ever shows, to be quite honest. I can appear to people as uncaring or too self-absorbed or reserved but it's only because I **** at the art of self-expression. Really, since 1995. I'd keep it all to myself although inside I am shattering. And people would have no idea because I NEVER SHARE. But ever since I was a child, I'd get these instances of melancholy simply because I can see other people (who I should not even care about) twist in pain or I'll see so much injustice that it makes me feel indignant or I can see something is wrong with someone the moment I talk to them. Things just affect me in ways that I could never understand. Add to that is my defining characteristic of being a ******* introvert. My introversion has given way to me becoming a highly introspective person. So I'd think about life a lot, question life a lot, wonder why we are as we are and some existential **** like that.

I hated all the pain I went through these past few weeks. I am a person who is independent and knows herself completely. But when depression hit me, I was clouded in a mist of ambiguity. I dont know anymore who I was, I could not understand y emotions, i could not feel happy when I am doing the things that I love. It just ****** me into a black hole. There were times that sleep was my only remedy. Partly because I wanted to escape the loneliness, the anxiety, the self-loathing and my entire body refusing to cooperate and partly because I felt tired all the ******* time and even if I slept for an entire day, I would still feel the same when I wake up. But today, I felt happy that I went through all of them. Even if there was one time that I gagged my mouth with pillow because I was about to scream in so much pain— (thank god I was alone in the room) and afraid that I might scare the other dormers away. That night as my eyes felt like rivers ,I swore that I will not let this control me. I swore that someday I'll find out why the hell this happened to me. And then I cried even more because even when all that pain was overpowering me, I still had a little hope left in me. I felt like I found a fragment of myself again. That somehow I wasnt totally *******. It was absolute contradiction but at that time I existed in between the two polar opposites of myself.

Depression is like being on the edge of a very steep cliff. You're about to fall, constant fear stops you but beneath your feet, you see wonder from beyond. You see possibilities. You see a town from somewhere far where there is so much life. You see a forest from afar and it seems so wonderful you start believing in good things again.I've  come to remind myself that I had a family, I had friends but most importantly, pain is a great wake up call. I thought love is a great unconquerable emotion. I severely underestimated pain and how it can change people. Pain brings wounds that either scar us for life or bring a different perspective. I'd say I've seen the worst possible side of me when I got depressed. It was scary and it makes you hate yourself. You get repelled because it's dark and ugly. But on the flip side, I saw how pain has made me see that after all that, I could make it. In fact, everyone can. I also peered into the mind of depressives and it was extremely helpful since I have good friends who have been cursed with this disease (they were suicidals even). I'd lack the understanding when they shared their experiences to me before but now I was slapped in the face for even considering to call them selfish or cowards. They are not. I feel like I need to tell people this because depression can only be understood when you have been there. People have different ways of handling pain which my mom likes to call 'pain threshold'. Some have it deeper, some can only contain pain in few doses. I wanted to give each and everyone who had ever been depressed a big hug because nothing is worse than losing meaning in life. And my heart goes out to each and everyone of us who caged all that pain and somehow moved forward despite the odds. Quite honestly, I would have preferred being hit by a car and be confined for more than a month than go through all that sadness and meaninglessness where hell is walking right inside you/strong desire to want to give up on life altogether/strong desire to be shaken off by society as an outcast and that won't even matter. You'd literally want to do anything just to take away all that hopelessness and misery. But at the same time you're too tired to do anything. Most terrific **** I have been so far, just ******* terrific.

*I wrote the first part of this entry when I was on the plane going home. Tonight, I finished it with a heavy heart. I am depressed again despite being with people that I love most and engaging in lovely talk with them just a couple of hours ago. My emotions are being strung along by someone other than myself. My distractions are no longer working—I might need new ones.  As I looked back to parts of this entry I realized that this condition gives me brief chances where everything is peaceful. I just hold on and wait for those chances. I've seem to tolerate this better now and my mood swings reveal a general pattern of anxiety first, normalcy then on to depression. Sometimes there are specific times, sometimes it's all random. This has been unnecessarily long but I have only been comforted by two things during my depression: music and writing. Although to be quite honest, writing can also cause me to be more depressed as I have lost my energy and motivation to write even when the other side of my brain cries in frustration because I do love writing so much. Music on the other hand gives me a lot of hope for some reason and a form of escape from all the unwanted thoughts. Some songs do make me more melancholic but my interest in music has changed ever since I started getting depressed.
Super rough draft. My writing has become pretty meh but I really wanted to share this. I have jumbled all my ideas in what seems to be an incoherent mess. Though in my defense, my brain has worked 5 times slower ever since. I could still count but most of the time my head's all black canvas with slight moments of paranoia.
Ashley Feb 2017
Depressed Depressed Depressed
They stay, staining the grass upon which they lay.
Corpse that walk amongst the living,
with beautiful smiles that hide their trimmings.
Specs Jun 2018
The comedian is depressed—
Irony at its peak.
People cannot see the lies
Whenever she starts to speak.

The comedian is depressed.
Her smiles are not her own.
Day and night pass by and by,
Her house is not a home.

The comedian is depressed,
But the audience cannot tell.
In the end that's all that matters,
That, and if you perform well.

The comedian is depressed,
Head filled with gray and blue.
You cannot know the full extent
Until you acknowledge that it's true.

The comedian is depressed,
Each laugh is fleeting, at most.
Original thoughts inside her head
Tied her to a whipping post.

The comedians are depressed,
And more are going away.
How much longer till people think
To ask if we're okay?
Ashley  Apr 2013
depressed
Ashley Apr 2013
I am not complaining
I am depressed.
I do not mean the garden variety
Typical misnomering
Ignorant word use.

I am actually depressed
Things have happened
That caused me to be depressed
Things happen
That make it worse.

But do not take my words
In the wrong manner
Because I know the difference
Between sad
and depressed.

I am depressed
There is no
Sugar coating to be had
I accept it
But it hurts.
Carey  Apr 2014
Depressed Hurts
Carey Apr 2014
Depressed comes
Depressed going
Depressed Stay in my head eating away at me
Depressed brings the pain
Depressed bring the ****
Depressed cut me into two

— The End —