I search for you
In my sleep I reach for you
And my fingers grasp the blankets
My teeth find the plush of my pillow
I scream when I find you're gone

I search for you
My eyes scan crowds
Until I catch a glimpse of black hair
My breath catches
And my tongue finds my cheek

I search for you
When my phone rings
The ringtone I don't have
Still plays in my mind
I hear you

I search for you
When I make inside jokes
Waiting for someone to laugh
The flicker of recognition
That flashed in your eyes

I search for you
When I touch him
And his breath tickles my neck
His eyes scan my nakedness
I nearly call out your name

I search for you
When I look in the mirror
And I don't recognize myself
I am no longer beautiful
The way you described in scribbled letters

I search for you
In my dreams
I beg for you to stay
Then you smile and leave me
Did you smile when you died?

I search for you
Every breath that I take
I feel your heartbeat
In my chest
You owned me, and I owned you

I search for you