i’ve lost it
I’m not sure what it is
but whatever it was
it must have been good
because without it
i’m lost.

i’ve been mopping
myself up off the floor,
a hard tile floor,
where I get stuck in the cracks
and my bones crack with the labor
of it all,
of mopping myself off the floor.

i’m a wet pile of something,
a wet pile of flesh and blood
and hopes and dreams lost,
mopped up by a skeleton,
the crippling fear of everything,
but even she’s exhausted
she can’t do it anymore.

i swear to god
i swear i hate him,
wherever he is,
if he exists,
i'll **** his name and
walk backwards into hell.