freedom comes with the highest price/i paid for my sanity with my blood

i once was a nice child
so innocent and kind
i was polite and friendly
the nicest girl you'd ever find

I'd clean up my room
and put all my toys away
I'd smile and be ecstatic
when grandma came to play

when mother came home
I'd give her a kiss
make her a cup of tea
and tell her she was missed

everything was brilliant
life was so great
until mother brought home a boyfriend
someone I'd grow to hate

u see he was friendly towards me
gave me gifts as well
but when no one was around
he made my life hell

now for the sake of my dignity
i will not say what he did to me
lets just say he caused me pain
and eventually almost drove me insane

so now to ease the terrible pain
i pick up my knife and slit open a vein
i bandage my wounds and lick up the blood
i know i shouldn't cut myself but the pain makes me feel good

and i know blood is a high price to pay
just to take my pain away
but at least when i watch my life drain away from me
i can heal myself for today and keep hold of my sanity

until the next day comes
and I'm left all alone
crying on the floor
in the place i call home

Because i lost the battle
i was trying to win
my demons beat me
so i gave in

and tomorrow mom when you get out of bed
thinking I'm asleep, sweet dreams filling my head.
you'll see blood on the sink and blood on the door
and me lying dead on the bathroom floor

And there will no suicide note to explain the reason why
I really felt like I had to die
although written on the wall and the mirror too
will be ' I'm a human not a zombie and i don't love you'