I am slipping but no one can see.
I am slipping but no one can help.
I am slipping down into the abyss I won't know if it safe till I get there.
I can't no if I'll get back up till I tread them steps

I am slipping I can feel it.
Things don't feel right anymore.
Things and people are just out of my reach.
I have been slipping for a while and while my eyes are screaming out for help, my face betrays me and all u see is a smile.

I make no sound I've been down this hole before. I slide down as in slow motion to where my demons hide.
If no one can look at me n think....**** she's slipping I'll just say hi.

I'll just see if she needs a hand.
No. They just walk on by.
I slip a little further each day... the day I stop is the day I give up.

I just want him to reach within my soul
and try to grasp all the pieces that make me whole.

Crying.
Yesterday
Today
And
Tomorrow.
Why?
Why?
...

miss you.

I see you sat there alone.
If only you could see me beside you.
I see you hurting on the inside.
If only you would let me help.
I see the pain behind your smile.
Your soul is clear to see.
I see the sadness in your heart.
If only you could feel my hand in yours.


I hear the tremor in your voice.
I no your near the edge.
I hear the sobs rattle threw your chest.
I no you cry in silence.
I hear you whisper my name in your sleep.
I no you can't hear me but I answer every time.

You....your not alone. I no it hurts but I never left.


And by you I mean me....

A tear or two.

As I sit n think of you a tear rolls down my face. It splashes on the paper I hold in my hands. As I sit and try to remember A happier place 2 more tears snake down my cheek n get lost in my hair. For as long as I can remember you have been in my head, heart and life. But now all I have is this paper.
As I sit in complete silence it's you that haunts me. A tear...One... Two. ...three....sixty.....I've lost count.
The ache in my chest when I think of why your gone.
Another two are lost in my hair......
The lump in my throat to know you are gone.
Ten... twenty it's a river now...
You were my world. My life is missing you. I am missing you.
I wipe my face..compose myself...another year and your still gone.
I'll see you again of that I'm sure but until that day....
I'll cry a tear or two when I think of you.


For my very good friend Gareth usher...