I want to cry
I want to scream
Yet I have to hide
How I truly feel

Hearing the words
Your kids need you
Your kids need you happy
You can't cry
You can't give in

What if its too much
What if I can't breathe
Can't think
Can't survive feeling like this

What if

11 years ago
We met
Butterflies flew
Sun shined
As our lips connected

I wasn't fully ready
I sed goodbye

Back to now
You came back
Like nothing changed
You became the dad
My son always needed
Watching you both laugh
Bonding
Melted my heart

2 years later
You got down on
One knee and
Sed the question
I sed yes

As the butterflies flew
Sun shined
As our lips connected again

Year later
We see 2 lines
The panic sets in
But the smile grew too
We made a life

Up and downs
Came and went
But no one reached
For the door

Butterflies flew
Sun shined
As our lips connected

Things are starting to fall into place
I think or am I lying to myself
What more could I ask for
I got the man
I got two beautiful kids
So why wouldn't I be

Yet I'm still stuck
Anxiety overloads
Scared of myself
What have you done to me
Wanting acception from you
But why

You don't care about me
You only cared when I sed
Yes here take it
Yes here control me
Yes here's my life

Your meant to show me
How to live
How to survive
How to grow up
How to be strong

Yet all you taught me was
How to relay on you
How to struggle
How not to budget
How not to love

So all I will say is
Goodbye
The hardest goodbye I've ever done
Soo ....
Bye mum bye dad

I will survive on my own
I will teach my kids
I will make them stronger
I will make them smile
I will make them laugh

Because that is what
A parent should do

So it all began 10 years ago
We met just as friends
Felt something
Tried to be lovers
Was good but I wasn't  
I walked away,

Couldn't drag you down
You had everything
I had  nothing
Loved you but had to let you grow

Never in a million years
Would I think you would
Ring up my phone
Ask to see me again

Me with a child
Who would love me now
Yet you didn't see that
You saw the me, you did
All them years ago

Take us to Maccies
Little treat for catch up
To feel just the same
You lean in
Butterflies

Now 3 years later
You ask the question
Would I be yours forever
How could I say no

Now to be having your child
Is this a dream
Someone pinch me

Why do you want me to fail
Why can't I be happy
Why do you want to take my son

Hes all I have
You messed up
But you want to take him
He can't fix your mistakes
He can't mend the wounds

Hes my success
My pride my joy
I raised him
With no help from you

They say