i.
We would sleep, but never touching,
your sheets were always cold,
your room dark, like a thick blanket

You told me tonight that all you
wanted to do was hold me in your arms,
I didn't know if this was the truth
or the ***** speaking your sentiments
for you

ii.
You have been out with women,
women who I'm sure were beautiful,
who were possibly more expressive,
more full of life,
able to offer you what I couldn't
but still, you said
that you were left with
comparisons
and that every time

I won.

I hate all nighters
Stress and anxiety ****
I give up, good night.

You know how the Lorax spoke for the trees? I feel the need to speak for my four-year-old niece. Not because she can't speak -- she can and rarely stops once she starts -- but because there are certain concepts time has yet to grant her. So until time does, I got you covered, Lucy.*

Mommy,
you call it the "poetry" of a child's sleep,
ohh 'n ahh, she's so, so sweet,
I call it child's "pose." Not the yoga neither.
I'm posing and rolling and cooing
biding time until you're tripping on the
Ambien retreating to a dream.
You're only reprieve.
'Cause when your *** is asleep,
I be mixing up the Play-doh,
red and yellow, black and white,
'till it's 50 shades of brown, alright?
Dirt pies from the backyard,
put 'em by the brownies
in the morning world-weary in your pajamys
Slip-up, slip-up, I smell a slip-up.
Ain't a direct threat, Queen Buttercup
because you'd just say, "I ain't afraid of you, shorty."

Blood flow. Blood slow. Simmering, saucy.
Mommy, looking down skyscraper balcony.
May I remind, a giant ain't bringing down Manhattan,
It's that little, wayward wrecking ball, eh Captain?

Over my shoulder, drinking from a thermos --
stumble in your step mean you gettin' nervous--
hand me piece of paper and two crayons
macaroni orange and swamp water liaisons
these coloring sheets are so bourgeoisie.
These coloring sheets are so bourgeoisie.
"Color outside the lines, eh Lucy?
don't play by the rules," my Mommy say,
but I been around long enough to know dat
'dese rules pay. Outside the lines?  Is just uh sloppy.
Been outside the club in front of the line
with my fellow shawties.
Slip-up, slip-up, I smell a slip-up.
Ain't a direct threat, Queen Buttercup
because you'd just say, "I ain't afraid of you, shorty."

Blood flow. Blood slow. Simmering, saucy.
Mommy, looking down skyscraper balcony.
May I remind, a giant ain't bringing down Manhattan,
It's that little, wayward wrecking ball, eh Captain?

Chicken and fries three meals-a-day.
Chocolate milk three meals-a-day.
Tricycle boys three wheels away.
Hands on your hips can't make me stay.

Lego blocks lodged in your skull.
I've hid the Advil. The Dayquil. Drank the Nyquil though.
Alright, alright, time to get confessional.
All my ***** accidents are intentional.
I melt my own Barbies to feel alive.
Snort glue sticks just to get hella high.

Mommy, you've got a messy ketchup face.
Mommy, you've got spiders in your hair.
Mommy, you've got ***-*** on your pants.
Ha. Ha.
Ha. Ha. Ha. Ha. Bi-otch.

Blood flow. Blood slow. Simmering, saucy.
Mommy, looking down skyscraper balcony.
May I remind, a giant ain't bringing down Manhattan,
It's that little, wayward wrecking ball, eh Captain?

Ever wonder what someone's sadness feels like?
Ever really see that there's a huge difference between theirs and your own?
What you understand as depression, may only be a blue day for another.
I suppose that's why we can't relate to all poetry,
Or truly understand much of it,
To its cold point.

How can we be predispositioned in good,
While surrounded by so much evil?
Call it human nature;
No such thing as corruption,
Instead it's all about purification.
Daily struggles, testing our patience and ability to remain on a steady path.
Each successful decision resulting in a step closer to personal sublimation.

So what if dreams are reality,
And reality is just the dream?
Who's to say life is what it seems,
And that dreams are only mental representations of our inner desires?
Life's a withdrawal and dreams are the drugs that stop it,
Yet equally prolong it.
Then you wake up again.

I like you like I like sunny days,
and sun rays,
and kittens,
and chocolate ice cream.
And you make me happy like that **** does.

I like you like I like my bed in the morning,
and my black out shades shut,
and watching Netflix in bed all day,
with my Christmas lights on.
And you make me feel warm like that **** does.

I like you like I like walking through the woods,
and staring up at the clouds,
and writing late at night,
and even talking to myself.
And I like you like I'm discovering something.

And I like you like I wasn't expecting you to come along,
like I haven't felt this way in a really long time,
like you keep me wondering.
like you're different.
And if I'm being completely honest,
I've never met another person as interesting as you.

I want you think about me like I think about you,
and I want you to like me like I like you,
and I want you to be able to know little bits about me that other people don't.
I want you to notice things that I'm not trying to show off, like my earrings,
I want you to notice things that are just for me,
And I want you to notice them purely because you're interested in discovering who I am too.

And I know whatever is going on between us has an expiration date,
and its not fair that time isn't on our side,
but I don't care that I only have a couple weeks with you,
because you've begun to awaken a part of me that I missed.
And it hurts sometimes,
but I don't mind the ache,
because you've already brightened a spark in me that was dim for too long.

And I don't want you to forget about me when I'm not there next year,
or over the summer,
or even this weekend.
I want you to think of me and always remember lazy mornings spent under my covers,
and late nights spent getting ****** and eating Sriracha and carrots,
and long days spent under the Mexican sun.

I want all this because I like you,
and I can't take it away,
and I can't lessen it,
and I can't apologize for it, and I'm not going to try to,
because, whether you realize it or not, you're helping me.

And the way I feel about you is so bittersweet,
and when this all ends it might break my heart,
because I think it already is.

I like you like I like gloomy skies,
And saying goodbye,
And snakes,
And dropping my ice cream cone.  
And you make me unhappy like that **** does.

I like you like I like the ****** heating in my room,
And waking up too early on a hung-over morning,
And having to work through a headache,
With the constant urge to *****.
And you make me feel tired like that **** does.

I like you like I like getting held under the ocean’s current,
And being stuck inside on sunny days,
And not being able to fall asleep at night,
And overanalyzing every interaction with you.
And I like you like I’m losing something.

And I like you like you never should have come along,
Like I haven’t felt this way in a really long time,
Like you keep me down,
Like you’re exactly like all the other guys.
And if I’m being completely honest,
I’ve never met another person as manipulative as you.

I don't want you to think about me like I think about you,
And I don’t want you to like me like I like you,
And I don’t want to share any more of myself with you.

And I knew whatever was going on between us had an expiration date,
But you didn’t even let it spoil before you threw it away.
And I know it wasn’t fair that time wasn’t on our side,
But I didn’t care that I only had a few weeks with you,
Because you were making me feel something good.
And now it hurts,
And I need the ache to dull,
Because it’s starting to **** my shine.

And I don’t want you to forget about me when I’m not there next year,
Or over the summer,
Or even this weekend.
I want you to think of me and always remember the girl that cooked you dinner,
And helped you with your homework,
And gave you more than you deserved.

And I don’t want this anymore,
And I can’t pretend to feel okay,
And I can’t smile around you,
And I can’t apologize for it, and I'm not going to,
Because whether you realize it or not, you hurt me.

And the way I feel about you is so crystal clear,
And now that this has all ended, you can wave sticks and throw stones,
But you can never break my bones.