"Are you in love?"

'No, not yet.'

"When do you think you'll fall in love?"

'Come the day I'll learn to love myself.'

"When will that happen?"

'Surely not anytime soon.'

"And why is that?"

The truth is,

        I'll never find someone
        who despises me
        as much as myself

        and I'll never be able
        to let someone love me,
        'cause they said

        "you have to love yourself first,
              before anyone else does"

But what if I'll never do?

Life is not about
how long you have lived
it's about how well you have lived
even for a short period of time,
and that's how anyone can be young.

I think that
there'll never come a day
that I'll be able to return your love.

Because in order to do so
I have to love myself first.

And that's something
I can't see myself doing
even after a million years.

I'm sorry.

Sometimes all you really need
is a hot cup of coffee
and great company

oh, and music too.

Why do people love in the first place?
Why do you let yourself get hurt?
In love, it isn't all about solace
You know you'd get hurt, you know it
But you still love anyways

How do you love someone?
Is there a proper way to do so?
Love does not have a guideline
It's one of the things in Earth
Where there's no right or wrong

So why keep putting boundaries?
Why prevent people from happiness?
Let them experience the ache, the pain
For them to realize, to actually realize
Just how lucky they are, to be in love

To be happy

i've never been inlove before
nor have i wanted to.

i have never been the one to dream about love
to want it, and think how lovely it could be.

i have never slept in the a.m.
just so i could to talk to someone
about literally everything and anything

i have never held a man's hand
that wasn't my father's
or my kid brother's

i have never felt so much happiness
so much that my heart could burst

and i've never felt pain like this before
nor have i cried myself to sleep because of a boy

i never thought that receiving a letter or playlist
could be as romantic as all those sappy movies

i have never gotten my heart broken before










until you.

He had fallen in love with a broken girl
in hopes of fixing her, he had stayed.

Never had he thought he'd end up getting broken too.
Who would love a broken girl?
Who could fix a broken girl?

Despite this he had stayed
not so he could fix her but because he would be with her
when she loves herself and picks up her broken pieces.

And she would do the same, for him.

I hate having to beg for attention
But I'm scared of not getting any

I hate that I have to beg for your time
But I have no choice, you're my life line

I hate this feeling of loving alone
But that's how much I love you

So I'll still beg for it anyway
No matter how long it takes
Even if my bones will break

Because we weren't what we used to be anymore
because all I can do for you is to stay by your side
and be someone you can hold onto
while you pick up your broken pieces.

It seems like fate is done with our story.
I'm the only one holding on
and so all that is left is our faded memories.

oh and a mess of me and my broken pieces.

i know this isn't poetry
but i'm tired of
relying too much
on coffee and
sleeping pills

it ***** when you're sad and the tears won't ******* fall like **** let me cry out my guts and my feelings

I don't want to feel numb and void of emotions, let me feel anything at all because not feeling anything scares me more than being depressed

I fell too deep
Never got back up
It's too late for me

Go save yourself

At the end of the day
there'll be a beautiful sunset
waiting for you

Right afterwards
the sky will be painted black
with twinkling stars for comfort

But then the clouds start to cover them
Blocking your view, and the demons
they appear again in your head

It's past midnight: early a.m
you have no idea
why you feel how you do

You just lay there alone
with vicious thoughts running around
as the tears slowly start to fall

From your cheeks to your nose
and your clothes even got wet
and you run out of breath

You try not to make a sound
because no one should know
it won't be any good for anyone

Until you fall asleep
and hope to have a good dream
but still you fail to be happy

Even in your sleep
not a hint of joy to be found
only this pounding feeling in your chest

And then you hear the alarm sounding off
As your eyes open you see darkness
The same ceiling you stared crying to sleep

It took every ounce to get out of bed
to face a new day
and be miserable inside

As the sunrise comes
we have to pretend once again
how can I stop this feeling?

I just want to get out
for a while from reality
and into your arms
feeling your warmth

I just want a hug
in this rainy weather
a short break from it all
all I ask for is a cuddle

Death is not creeping up to me
I am running straight to it
Just a tiny spec in the universe
Forgotten only after it blossomed

My hands are losing its grip
I am bound to let go anyway
This slowly fading presence
Insignificant in the eyes of others

There is no fight left in me
Let it be if the world rejects me
Karma is only giving what is due
And I am in no place to reject it

The feeling of pain is gone now
Here there is only nothingness
I feel so light, without worries
I am undeserving but will go in peace

All I need is to be forgotten
I don't need to be six feet under
Nor ashes to be scattered at sea
For at last I can rest from this lifetime

I am empty,
Trying to squeeze out words
To make a poem that is loved
At the same time hated

A poem that is loved
Because of its familiar sound
A poem that is hated
Because of the reality it portrays

I am empty,
Empty of love
Trying to fill up my heart
Only ending up void again

Again. Here we go again
This feeling of emptiness
Never quite sure
Of one's own emotions

Stranger. Who are you?
It's as if they were strangers
Not knowing what she loves
What she hates,  what she wants

She is her own stranger,
A different person each day
And each day again
That stranger felt empty

Always stuck in between,
between being a kid
        and growing up
between being grateful
        and wanting more

I'm always stuck in between,
        but somehow never stuck
        in your heart, your mind
                                  your soul

You were always stuck in mine
Whether you wanted to or not

When people say that
they got you always
but end up ditching you
in the dust, makes me realize
how I really only have
myself to rely on

You said
It was happy being with me
but as you got to know me
You left

we're worlds apart
you
&
me
just like in this poetry

At times we crave for attention
at other times we crave for appreciation
but at the end of the day,
I think all we really want is for love.

I want someone who hugs me from behind.
I want someone who'll kiss me on my forehead before my lips.
I want someone who loves me without really knowing why.
I want someone who I can be myself with.
I want someone who makes me laugh with their own laughter.
I want someone who'll go with all of my craziness.
I want someone I can never have.
I want all of it.
I want you.

because I don't know you anymore
where I am in you
where I belong

It feels like treading on shattered glass
I don't know where to stand or where to go
and so the blood keeps dripping
and all that'll be left are scars on my feet

Today when the sun was setting,
                          I ran into a friend
whom I haven't seen in a long time.
As the cold air blows, I stopped in my tracks.
And he just p a s s e d me by.

I was a stranger - to someone I considered
                             - a friend.

And it hurt. I was a stranger to him.
Like the memories we shared
               - got taken away by the winds.
This made me feel
the cold breeze up until my nape.

And when the sun finally set,
At least the moon
              - shined brightly to comfort me.
Yet it still made me remember
the memories we shared under it.

i can't hear my own voice
only the voices in my head
i'm losing myself, i don't know

      i've met many people
that act like they care
like they know me
they think can save me
they know nothing at all

      These feelings they
  eat me
    tear me
      hurt me
        b r e a k    me

i forgot what it felt like to live
i was gone in a world that i made
          - a world for my
            e s c a p e.

How have you been?
Are you all right?
I look at the night sky and think of you
I listen to songs that remind me of you

Are you doing fine?
Have you eaten yet?
I passed by your favourite restaurant today
I watched the first movie we saw together

I wonder how the stars look up there
Do they look different up close?
How have you been?
Because I've been missing you since

It wasn't that I never loved you
It was just that I loved you too much
that I had to let you go.

but you don't really have to know that.

What if the sky wasn't blue
or if I ever discover something new
what if all your promises stayed true
all of your I love you's

What if we look at things at different view
will things change for us to come through?
what if somehow we'll make do
and maybe meet again at our rendezvous

Maybe if we stayed true and knew
that someday sunrises will be our view
there's no need to read into
just hold my hand and whisper sweetly

I love you

I am in love with a man
whose heart is taken,
yet he does not know of it yet.