The morning sun rays don't awake me with tender kisses
They curse and spit before slapping against my eyes
I procrastinate breathing in deep air before I finally let
The tiny razor blades speed into my nostrils
I try not to contemplate my bed of daggers
As I cut my feet through the harsh blades of cold floor
"It is a good morning" I whisper and let the rest of the war begin

for whatever reason
i cannot move
i cannot breathe
i cannot think
for whatever reason
i am paralyzed
by the lack of movement
in my chest
for whatever reason
i am asphyxiated
by the lack of air
in my lungs
for whatever reason
i am disoriented
by the plethora of voices
in my head

I always love falling asleep,
the moment where anything could happen in your dreams,
the moment where I can forget that my world is messed up.

When I'm sleeping,
I'm not sad,
I'm not angry,
I'm not lonely.
I'm happy.

I can forget I have scars on my wrists and on my heart,
I can forget that everyone at school hates me.
I can forget.....

Sleeping is my way of escaping from the pain of the world,
because some days all I want to do is sleep forever.