He Fights to be the Provider,
Hiding the Pain he Sometimes feels,
Trying to be your Healer,When you both have to seal -Deals ...
In life that give way to many...
Mistakes, He lifts you up when your feeling down,
Holding all he feels deep, Down,
Worries about what you don't have while trying
to make you Laugh,
Sometimes Sitting  up, Late at night thinking
of another way to give everything
Helping you
Through the old wounds of pain caused by another Mans
Abuse,un truths or lies you never forgave,
Taking blame even thou its not in him to hurt
this presious women,
To him You are everything,
Asking Nothing of himself,
When your in pain he leands the help,
taking all your worries away
Pain Skecthed on his face,
You dont Notice, your too stuck in your own
Turmoils, You dont think..., What dose he need,
A Mans Struggles
Is beyound us,We only know what we WANT, As Women
Some of Us don't trust enough or care long as we
Get OUR share..,
We aruge with him,
Fight and fuss,
Making it harder on him to just be a Man
His Struggles,
Not to mention The Father or daddy to some of our kids,
Even when their not even his,We burend you with our self
conclusions and confusions, Make you Pay Everyday
for something you didnt do or Never Could..
Mistreatment is evident as
We give to him
Our own Abuse ...Words Hurt him too,
Even thou he Holds it ALL in
As Girls, Ladies and Women,We concurred you,
With looks of our own Deceptions and lie to get you in our web,
Black Widows Grasping at you, laying you on the plater not really
knowing what "lies" Ahead,
Not All Women but Many of THEM...,
Taking him from Man to the Beast paying for
The ******* by other old peeps family
or the Other Ex's
Not leaving Room for him to be Next,
Or The Best...,
**** His Struggles and let him deal with mines,
Let him see me as I want him to,
his girl we say, His Lady, His wife,
His Baby Momma
With all the strife and Drama,
Causing him to be Not Man but less of Him,
Make him the Next Abuser,
No its not Right but
hey Thats life,
or THE Way you want it to be..
You wanted more of his time,
stopped him from making a Dime or paper,
To Recreate him
Not in God's Image but as You want it..,
Women Listen...
He's
Giving all he can, Working Paying bills..,
In the street or 9to 5 ...,
Doing anything to let You get by,
THIS MAN STRUGGLES.
Yeah he gets a little satisfaction
from all that he's done to just put
that Smile on your face ...,
See his kids say
Hey my Daddys great,
But Given His Struggles His way of doing things..,
its time to sit and think
what it means to be a MAN,  Be Men....,
A Mans Struggle's
We dont talk much about...,ONLY what he do "WRONG"
or what he's NOT willing to Do for you,
You Complain
About what's NOT Given  or  
NOT done (done/doing RIGHT) whats not yours
or what He DONE gone in did AGAIN & AGAIN...
This Song Continues,
And now hes got your Tune Stuck in his Head,
Negatives not Words of Encouragement,
NO  Praises and Thanks for helping Rasie these bad as kids ...,
Putting food and gifts & Roof over ya Heads,
Saving up, time to spend and taking work off...not that its a cost
YOUR willing to make
( cuz Some just Aren't Going to Take it/US Women)
or to even say THANKS,
Some Of us Women just dont Get it,
Can't Say all Women but
I know Plenty of THEM,
Not willing to take his place on any given DAY...
Making him..,
Not a man but worse than sin, taking away his "self"
Esteem and the MAN you ONCE Fell in love with,
is No longer him,
Changing him Again til he's unreal...
Saying "I do" just to Get his Dibbs,
Saying "I love you" just to pay a bill,
STOP WORRYING
ABOUT WHEN HIS NEXT PAY IS,
OR IS HE GOING TO BE THE NEXT
to do what the Ex's did to you...,
ABUSE YOU,
THINK OF THE ....
Love he's giving..,
You as a women and for
giving the realationship a chance,
Wow to just be a ma!,
HIS STRUGGLES,
GOT ME IN a TRANSITION OF FEELING HIM
AND LISTENING TO ALL YOU MEN!...
I  Apologies if this Was ever me
(I bet I did it too acted petty and lost a good Man,)
I AM THANKFUL AND YOUR HEAVEN SENT.
AGAIN TO ALL THE GREAT MEN...
To all you Wonderful MEN...I say AGAIN TY...
I know some of the ****
your in and I feel your pain at times Too,EVEN
if I don't ALWAY Understand You,
Even when I'm Yappying my Mouth...,
Talking a bunch of ****,
I give Thanks to you,
all you men For DEALING with it!
Hench I dedicate this
to You Men
Cuz I can only Guess About.....
A MAN'S STRUGGLES!!!
Always Me Ayeshah

Life crumbles my visions asunder,
Ignorance shoves me into clumsy blunder,
Love throws me into the zone of blinder,
Forgetting that I'm a Pathfinder.

When life deprives me off the briddle,
When everything seems to be a puzzle,
When my story goes like a riddle,
In grief, I hear life playing it's own fiddle.

Heavy weight makes my legs jiggle,
My blistered feet make me stumble,
But 'they' see me and chuckle,
While they used to praise me in hotels.

Engineering renders me a plater,
In my own house, am made a janitor,
I date a ****** city bunter,
Money in my life is a gutter.

Physique portrays me of a working Caliber,
So they ask "Do you work here?"
Yet behind the curtains am a begger,
A begger in fashioned attire.

I hate you for making me hate my favorite restaurant because you work there
Because that's where I met you
I don't go there as often as I used to for fear you will be working
For fear I will have to see you
For fear I will have to talk to you
For fear that if I do I will stumble over my words
Stutter, speak another language, have blood spur from my cheeks due to how much I would be blushing
Vomiting up words of my renounced love for you that lately I have been sick of swallowing
It would be embarrassing to say the least
Your palms would not sweat, chills will not appear on the back of your neck, you will be just fine
I can hardly talk anymore due to the amount of poems stuck in my throat
It is getting hard to swallow
It is getting hard to breath
I have been coughing up letters and syllables, numbers given to me that I forget to call because I don’t remember getting them
I am drinking away this sadness but more often than not I forget my name before I forget yours
I do not know who I am because of you
I am losing touch with every reality that your named is not tattooed on
I am in love with the idea of you loving me
You told me not to string myself along for something that may never happen
You meant this when you said it which was something unusual for you
And I turned the other cheek to seeing your new girlfriend at walmart
Turned the other cheek to her laughing at me
Turned it again when I drove all the way home without a seatbelt on
I find myself wanted to get in a fatal car accident so I am not so tempted to drive by your house
I hit all the green lights on the way their so there must be some viable reason for me going
I see a car in your driveway that I do not recognize I wonder if it is hers
And I know you did not mean to do this
It was not something you planned from the beginning, **** just happens I guess
You are completely unknowing of what you have done
And frankly I don't want to tell you
I wouldn't want to harm your ego
You wouldn't harm anyone
In fact you may be one of the nicest people I have ever met
Something about you switches on a light inside of me, igniting this darkness that I have been residing in
For a brief moment, you reminded me what it felt like to not be so blind to love
I sometimes wish I still were
I see you everywhere I go
You are the voice inside of my head
Every time I meet someone new I cannot help but plater your face on their, smell your cologne, do not let them touch me in the same places you have for fear of smudging the fingerprints
And I know, I know it makes no sense to place valuable pieces of myself into hands that have no grip
Hands that shake, that tremble
Hands that have touches bodies, making no memories of the valleys of their skin, the mountains in their bones
I have learned you cannot teach someone to feel, cannot teach someone to love
Cannot force them to wash their body in all that you are offering them
They have become too accustomed to lukewarm love in between ***** bed sheets, threaded backseats
I find myself wanting to be a bridge worth burning
I hate you for making me hate my favorite restaurant
Because you work there
Because that’s where I met you

Mine
Awesome
Never
Cool
Handsome
Eager
Safe
Time
     With my fingers scratching your chest
     Up and down
       I can use some other treats upon the abs
       Whip cream lick
       Strawberries higher
               You could be my plater
           You liking it
                My sweet tooth

Why you always speaking voodoo on my name

Trying to turn me violent

By boiling the blood in the canals of my veins

And short circuiting the wires energizing the flows in my brain  

It like you ******

When I crash into the base of my pains

Hoping that I would turn into sand

So you can bury your feet in the grains

Your logic has always been misconstrued

But now its just simply insane

Like... really ******* crazy

Exertion you abuse daily

Your life force steady draining

In attempt to jeopardize my safety

Im just trying to push these rhymes

Before you have me pushing these daises

But no

But Hell noo

But **** noooooo

You too lazy

And revenge like ***** on a plater

Is way too tasty

Its elementary to know that your wrong

But yet sing a song that does nothing but blame me

For the lost of your flame

For the tragedy associated with the syllables of your name

For the distortion of the water mirroring the curves of your frame

All things I have not nothing to do with

But I wish I could claim

Yet your determine to finalize this quest

So you stay unrest

Staying awake to see the sun dying in the horizon

To be silenced by the resurrect of the moons crest

A machine would be impressed

Witnessing you out perform its best

They way you devote your essences trying to obviate mine

A busy schedule

But thats fine

Because you always find time to make time

Why?

You could see so much more

Feel so much more

Do so much more

Be so much more

But you let hate consume your once illuminating core

So this is a warning to a soul I once adored

Free yourself from this self inflicted war

And don't think of me

Not even in the slightest anymore

Anxiety straps his body binding his muscles and locking his joints. Stress is visible on his torn bleeding fingers. Fear crippling his mind showing him the images of the world, ones that look like they're straight out of a Tim Burton movie. Dark demented but true. Oh so true. So true that everyone else has gone blind saying that everything is fine. But it's not. He's not fine. Oh no he may put on a smile and hide the pain in his eyes but it's there. You just have to look deep enough. Reality is so distressed we make up fantasies and call them reality. We ban all the things that will allow you to see the real world. We brain wash the children to believing that they deserve everything on a silver plater. "Reality" is not even real, just a fragment of our fevered imaginations. So when anxiety immobilizes your body, seizing your muscles and tightening them till they're strung taught. When it locks your joints not allowing you to move. When stress makes you mutilate your body by ripping the fleshy linings on your fingers pouring blood. When fear fills your mind giving you chills those little goose bumps and that shiver that runs down you spine when you know something is just not right. No not right at all because you can't handle the images of Reality and when you try to process them and tell others what you see they put you in a mental hospital. "For your own good" they said. They call you ******, crazy, mentally unstable. So you zip your mouth shut and let them think your ok. You let them believe that their child is not broken that they can still "save" you. You let them listen to these falsifications so you can go home and be "normal". So much so you start believing the lies again and forget the harsh Reality.

What to choose?
Which life to end?
A girl who made a mistake
And can't lead her own life anymore
Who has to pay for someone else's
She doesn't want?
Or a child who hasn't been born
Who has a right to life
But who takes someone else's
Who won't be missed?
But how many people will she have to discard for this one child?
This mistake.

Messing with a gun
And accidently shoot yourself?
We're happy to help.
Drinking since 15
And need a new liver?
Here's one on a silver plater.
Made a mistake or ****** broke?
Deal with it
Its your own fault
You made your bed
Now the two of you lie in it.

Life is important.
But living life is the point
Don't take that away
For the sake of reproducing a species
Already overpopulated
Let the girl live.
And when she's ready
She'll give you want you want.
Until then
There are millions of people
Who need help with bigger problems
Then the right not to choose
So leave a person's choice alone
And let them live.

To the fully licenced driver driving beind me, the L plater, 

I understand you may have had a long day at work and can't wait to get home.

That maybe you have a thousand other places to be or things to do. 

That you kids may be arguing in the backseat.

But please understand this...

This driving thing is new to me and it's a little bit scary, 

The whole,  everyone's lives are in your hands thing, it's real.

Understand that this time of day is busy, which means more cars for me to watch and I'm not as good at multitasking as you. 

Know that I'm trying my best.

So when I'm going 45 in a 50 zone, please don't sit right behind me like I'm doing 10.

Please don't beep your horn and get impatient because I'm trying my best.

I'm not as used to driving as you and I'm sure we'll both get home quicker if I don't cause an accident.

Know that it's in your best interest that I'm going below the limit as well as mine.

So even though I hesitate and may cause a few minutes of delay for you.

Know that everyone had to do it and once you were a learner too.

The Dark Messiah, I bring you
the Sun on a silver plater
of conscience, hungry for hope.
I give you back the tenderness,
fertility and freedom
that you constantly pursue.

I am not the same word
that escaped from your lips.
I do not associate myself
with the thought that wounds
the thin skin of the mind.

The Dark Messiah, take off
these shackles from yourself,
throw off the thorny shadow
from your back.
I will dance so that you will hear
about my existence.

I will fall in love with you
so much that all people will doubt
the proximity of heaven.
Distracted, enslaved by a glass dream,
I delight in the journey
of your hands on the map
of my body.

The Dark Messiah, I have found enough
truth in myself to resurrect
the overpopulated lie.