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WARNER BAXTER Jul 2015
“While the rules for writing haiku in Japanese are clear,
there is no Clear consensus for any other language.
This means that I am write and everyone else is wrong.”
                                                      ­            *~writer unknown~


Definition of: haiku* (according to Words Of Warner)

A secret and ancient Japanese style of poetry. Invented and
protected by the elite group of ninjas known only as The Basho.
Some say, The Basho dwell in a sacred temple made of gold and
rice paper, hidden deep in the bottom of Mt. Fiji. Others claim
they are in elaborate tents made from the finest silks at the
highest peak of Fiji. But no one knows for sure. Except maybe
James Mc. But he’s not talking.


How to write a haiku -

First, pick a subject. You must choose from the chosen list;
rain, wind, the sun, bugs, Mt. Fiji, Bruce Lee or frogs on a pond.
The only exception is snow, and only used during the winter.

Second, pick a form.  You can write in 1, 2 or 3 lines, sometimes
4. It all depends on those silly syllables, or as the Japanese call
it, morae. Remember, less is more, more or less always but never.
Here’s a tip, the best haiku are written backwards.


Now you are ready to write your own fun little foreign poems
called haiku.*



Note: if you are counting “morae” or words, don’t forget to divide
the number of “morae” by the number of lines, or is it divide
the number of lines by the “morae” and please use the                          on-line    Japanese counter/converter.
Haiku, a poem
five, seven then five morae
has only three lines.
Haiku poem describing haiku
Mateuš Conrad May 2020
the universe doesn't balance itself out
when i give... what's necessary to a petted
animal...
a petted... animal...
something that's: the animation of
an otherwise inanimate worth of a table...
the eclipse of the moon...
given four legs and furr and a meow...
but... this world... this... juggernaut
realism of: lost... pondering schizoids
of: what's loss... and what's reality...
honestly?
         the fact that i burden myself
with much cuddles... much cushioning
of "troubles"...
i pet a cat... i don't farm... a ******* pig...
although... i'd love to rephrase that...
i pet a cat... i milk... a cow...
i butcher a pig... i decapitate a chicken...
i "forage" for eggs: abortions...
i enjoy caviar...
esp. smoked salmon...
cucumber... dill... mayo...
bagel... rainbow trout overies...
****! i'd eat that sort of ****
in a pancake version...
oh... right... they do that...
in st. petersburg...
    my bad...
          no... i pet a cat... i pet a dog...
if i had a dog... it would be either
a rottweiler... or a dobermann...
and his dr. evil sidekick:
the dobermann-pischner...
the drwarf ******: geek heaven citation
pwetty lingo pwetty lingo... dachshund!
         knee-cap serves: the curb...
and the jaw and bite...
expanding wonders of
copernican revisionism...
or so... the afro... was... told...
how did... the dobermann-pischner...
become the... dachshund?
ate the wrong mushroom...
watched m.t.v. at the wrong time
during the 1990s?!
the ****... happened to this... lacklustre
of... merlin...
knee-capping...
    toe-tying and the brides
of... swan-lake imitation...
ballet! that one... celebrated... circumstance...
voyeurism of sadists...
safety... netted... ******* riddled...
flap...

it aches me to pet cats...
i should be farming pigs!
i should be... fake!
i won't eat a cat... though!
      but i'd love to...
               fake the sort of "petting"
that farming livestock involves...
to borrow from the brood of beef...
the sacrificial world:
advice...
why do i pet cats... why would i love
to pet a crow?
i do so... to escape...
what i hear... when...
people treat people...
worse than... **** treats maggots...
fore-runner! summon
the german!
       vorderteillaufschiene!

  there's... a ****** good reason...
why... michael portillo... didn't become...
the next leader of the conservative party...
gnats and the blonde blush: quiff...
scandi: wind-whipped ice-cream puff...
or... whatever...

it's such a terrible pointer to make...
why one pets animals...
rather than... herd them... farm them...
it's almost like...
what reading a book is...
to counter reading journalism...
a book to counter a day in
a newspaper's point...
of... the synonym of toilet paper...
books?! monster magnet of moths
and worms...
fair enough!

          i pet animals... cats... dogs...
i farm pigs...
  i race horses...
because... i want to escape...
what still remains...
how other humans treat fellow humans...
no excuses... but there are always
excuses...

it's that sort of automated "enough":
forgoe the farming of blid obedience...
for a "love" not wroth
a karen... a return embargo... pop / ****....
chisel the tree into a toothpick...
let's call it: the birch....
              
         the sentence of a skinning
sentencing: closure... elaborate...
the: western lands...
why i will milk the cow...
jockey the camel...
and not ride... the bull...
into war... to counter the use of horse...
had i used bulls:
what worth of war hogs...
lament of the: lost leisures...

when one pets animals...
one doesn't farm them...
     chickens' cluck plucking...
aeons of sunrise...
to pet an animal:
is to farm one...
      and all that...
         which is be made...
alternative sascrificial...
****'ite islam and...
islam from persia...
isn't...
        camel jockey...
       h'arabia...
                     mecca what new
tehran...
old iran: new islam...
                  xerxes: this old grief
with old "greece"...
              before the shawls of the baltic...
sea come forth... come late:
and the blood boiling: to the brim...

i am tragic... tsar impressions...
i better pet a cat..  loss of leash...
i better pet a dog: leash included...
lessen: the farming
of poultry abortions...
i pet dogs... i farm... cows...
i endeavour to eclipse the buddha...
in how... chimpz became...
giddy-to-fathom-how-man:
and the hugh-mann...

i pet details of lost art...
because... the chickens flouted...
the concept of pigeon flight...
and the crow-pecking...
MORAE... mora varies:
the universe of punctuation...

to pet a cat... to tame a dog:
to befriend: via leash...
to harnass a horse...
such befriending alienation...
the crisp loot of the petted...
not farmed..
and... the reality of...
"who's who" of the detail
of chimp treating the next to nothing...
loop / loot of a gorillaz
loitering: kin: next...
            
    no... the end...
     here's me to... loitering over
your grave...
and when... madame tussauds...
takes to concern itself
with... the better lived-up second
cause... for excusing...
the last... run;
morose over the drying of ink...
and the best... equipped...
loitering of... hybrid wax:
told! rodin never could...
scoop... a better "hiob".

— The End —