When I told you I loved you that was a bunch of bull shyt
I just know words like that get you the ***** quick
When I ran my fingers thru ya hand and swore I loved ya every strand
Yea sorry but that was me lieng again
See I know my homie just smashed you last week
He gave me heads up that particular spot in ya head makes you weak
When I held ya hand down the street and said. I love to do that
You didn't notice every five seconds I kept looking back
When I told you my phone was getting cut off so we wouldn't talk for a week
I knew yesterday you got paid and ya checks go direct deposit faithfully
It was lies
Sorry to give you this hurtful truth
And yes right about now you feel used
Still now I lie hell to keep it real
I don't know how you feel
But I know I lie
Do I do it on purposely no probably not
But I had a girl to part 1 after I had gave her all I got
It was then I inherrited this gift of tales
You know the on the edge close to the truth but not all the way there
Just lies
Open ya eyes its the new trend
No one tells the truth anymore honesty is the sin
Now go out like I did and spread this disease of lies to ya new lover
I give you the gift of never telling the truth to another
Just LIES

Time it takes ....
For me
To recover ...
From certain things
Slowing
Urgencies  ....
Growing.......
Yet I still sit still .....
I know ....
What I should be doing..
That part of me is currently..
Disabled......
I bury my head in pursuant of what I shouldn't be.........
Keeping me from what I could be....
So....
I simply justify by lieng
Using time constraints ,back pains ,
Covid ,or what ever it takes to postpone ..
Now I'm burry........
Lay awake all night stars in my eye
Some times a few tears .....
A little worried
If I finally find >........
...
It again.         Love
Will I be able.  
Or will I finally find that love all along was my Cain......
It's killing me
I'm alone and emotionally unstable

Many moons,
Flitter by ......
Haven't got the glitter out of my eye
My reflection is blurry
Mold upon my window cill  !
I sit dormant.....  
Dark grey consumes.
Hopes  and dreams ...
Blue skies  ,
Sunny days
Everything I want to do.....
A.K.A.    .........
YOU.
.........
I finally find.  ....
Only to find
I ....
Can't have you....
Change the epoch
******* epic
Ethan Frome tragedy
Deep convulsive inhale
Fade to black
Fin!
.....
...
.