"fragmentally" poems
How can I access these feelings
I’ve never felt before?
No experience can measure to the
pain I feel internally, fragmentally.
I’ve never felt real pain,
but I can write.
I can imagine how it is to feel this way
is this indirect or insincere?
I’m not sure.
But I feel it.
In my lungs I feel it.
In my heart I feel it.
In my brain I feel it.
Pain I’ve never experienced,
It’s inside of me
and I can’t make it leave.
How do I make it leave?
Apr 25, 2014
Apr 25, 2014 at 7:46 PM UTC
I packed you perfectly
like one packs organs in ice
to preserve them--
to keep the memory breathing
in a box of souvenirs from our six years
fragmentally put together,
until I'd need to relive them again.
I scanned our pictures like x-rays,
the bones glowing silver linings,
blurred and blue.
You always light up.
In any recollection,
you will always be the clarity
I connect to.
I have my moments-- Don't you too?
Nothing is what I thought it was.
I feel you pulsate like blood
under a bad bruise
I packed you perfectly.
You didn't move.
Nov 22, 2013
Nov 22, 2013 at 3:13 PM UTC
That which
has gone before
days that are
no more
but memory
never sleeps
even fragmentally
some remnants it keeps
how blessed
are those
who have no tears
know not life's throes
of anguish and pain
and what have I
to say? my sorrows
I hide. You asked: 'Why?'
But I can't refer you
to the file of my life--where it's kept
I know not---therein, forgotten
in dust and oblivion wrapped
for none could ever escape
from the all-pervading force of fate
free-will, courage, defiance
all drops in failure at its wrathful gate
yet, somehow, I don't know how
these my long-suffering tears
have given me more strength than I deserve
I prevail despite the onslaught of tumultuous years.
Feb 7, 2018
Feb 7, 2018 at 7:13 PM UTC
I stitched
hands trembling
patch to patch
concealing your perfection
your fabric pricked
with each new stitch
an inverse of C-section
Each ***** at you
a stab at me
and trickles of red blood
adorned
visage of clotted dreams
the color of dried mud
Patch after patch
meticulously
fragmentally I forgot
aware that there’s no other way
full of dismay
full of regret
A grim artwork
you stood and smirked
your scarred and awful smile
a bride of snide
spread far and wide
a dusty, mangled guise of guile
I covered
this textile Frankenstein
this fractured made a whole
covered myself with you
and mumbled
a prayer to rest
my tattered soul
Aug 6, 2018
Aug 6, 2018 at 2:57 PM UTC