Submit your work, meet writers and drop the ads. Become a member
Johanna Khan May 2013
Mit jeder Träne die fällt
Werden meine Gedanken klarer
Mit jeder Träne die fällt
Zerplatzt ein neuer Traum
Mit jeder Träne die fällt
Zerbricht mein Herz in neue Stücke

Dein Anruf hat mein Herz zum Rasen gebracht
Ich konnte nicht aufhören zu lächeln
Die Zukunft war eine Traumwelt
Du und ich und unsere Träume in ihr vereint
Gedanken an dich haben meine Tage verschönert
Gedanken an deine Stimme
Gedanken an deine Augen
Gedanken an deine Umarmungen
Gedanken die mich lächeln ließen
Und mir jetzt das Blut in den Adern gefrieren lassen

Mit jeder Träne die fällt
Werden meine Gedanken klarer
Mit jeder Träne die fällt
Zerplatzt ein neuer Traum
Mit jeder Träne die fällt
Zerbricht mein Herz in neue Stücke

'Take care' waren meine letzten Worte an dich
Die Antwort von dir - nur ein Lächeln
Dein letztes Lächeln für mich
Ist im Nachhinein auch mein letztes Lächeln gewesen
Nun flüstere ich jeden Abend mit dem Mond
Doch mein 'I miss you' wird dich nicht erreichen
Denn dein Mond ist jetzt ein anderer
Du hättest dieses eine Mal auf mich hören sollen!
Sie halt meine Liebe
Noch im Speicher
Ihre Augen werde ich nie vergessen
Ich sah Gott in ihr wie kein anderer
Wenn ich sie wieder zu sehen,
Wenn dor Tod keine Grenze
Lass es sein, oh Gott, lass es sein

Sie ubt Achtsamkeit in ihrem Gang
Sie spricht, wenn sie spricht
Sie liebt es, wenn sie allein ist
Sie erzahlte mir,
Und ich glaube, sie

Wenn das Ego hingibt Stolz
Wahre Macht gehalten wird
Wahre Liebe aufgedeckt
Und die wahre Wahrheit ans Licht -

Her kiss of days between

She holds my love
Still in memory
Her eyes I’ll never forget
I saw God in her like no other
If I am to see her again
If death is of no boundary
Let it be, oh God, let it be

She practices mindfulness in her walk
She speaks when she talks
She loves when she is alone
She told me
And I believe her

When the ego surrenders pride
True power is held
True love is uncovered
And the true truth is revealed
Jonas Sep 2023
Die Straßen ziehen vorbei
Licht an Licht wie fallende Sternschnuppen vorm Fenster.
Bei Tageslicht, Abenddämmerung, Sonnenaufgang
ein neuer Tag.
Bäume, Häuser, Felder,
Wälder

Die Materie meines Landes wiegt mich in die Schläfrigkeit,
geborgen
Das Buch in meiner Hand fällt in meinen Schoß
Immer noch dieselbe Seite,
bin immer noch nicht weiter.
Der Inhalt unverändert unbegreiflich
Mein Atem geht zum Rhythmus der Schienen unter uns.
Wir fliegen zusammen und doch bleibe ich allein.

Augen zu, Augen auf
du hast geblinzelt.
Ankunft, Abfahrt
du hast geblinzelt.
Auf ins Neue, ins Unbekannte
oder doch zurück zu alten Gegenden?
Durch die Entfernung wieder neu erlebt.

Kommst du jetzt wieder zurück?
Hast du genug bekommen,
Antworten gefunden auf die Fragen die du nicht fandest?
Die du nicht zu stellen wagtest?
Die dich trotzdem quälten?

Du warst zu lange fort,
deine Heimat ist noch hier,
aber Hier ist nicht mehr dein Hier,
längst ein anderer Ort.

Du wolltest alles hinter dir lassen,
gingest
trotz der Angst dann zu viel zu verpassen,
Hauptsache weg, weg von hier
dachtest du hättest nicht viel zu verlieren.
Allem entfliehen, Pause, Neuanfang
Ohne genau zu wissen was dieses Alles überhaupt war.

Hast du es nicht ausgehalten letztendlich
so ohne sie, die Anderen?
Im Nichts, im Nirgendwo auf eigenen Wegen zu wandern?
Einsam im Herzen hast du dich wieder verrannt
Im Herzen stumpf, die Seele verbrannt.

Nun kommst du wieder,
zurück,
um zu sehen was  noch übrig ist
Zurück zum Alten, Vertrauten, Selben
Wir sind aber nicht mehr die Selben
Du ja auch nicht.

Alles wieder etwas anders, verschoben
Wieder ein bisschen auseinander gelebt,
voneinander entfernt,
weitergemacht, natürlich, nur halt ohne dich.
Schade eigentlich.

Doch nun schließ die Augen, schlaf
Gestern war auch ein neuer Tag,
verronnen,
Morgen wird noch kommen.
Wer nie ankommt der reist für immer,
umher.

Naja, wenigstens auf Schienen,
und noch nicht entgleist.
Hope Less says to Merri Way that Frank Ly has been on her mind ever since Dana Point hooked up with Tim Id. Bea Serious, overhearing this, scoffs noting that Hy Perbole has been dissuaded from this notion.
          Enter Cliff Hanger, Adam Ant and Murray Hill who were hiding from Colin Oscocopy and Ty Lenol also following the same rumor, but they are shushed by Roman A. Clef who says he knows the real story.
          This occurs at the church social organized by Dawn Patrol. Bill Collector and Donny Brook watch from the periphery. Then comes the shouting: April Fools, Chuck Wagon, Moe Mentum and Ruth Less get into politics: it is a no-win situation. Fortunately, Benedict Ion, with the cunning Bob Cat is able to calm the situation.
          Di Alysis, new to town, chats up Peg Leg and Al Gorhythym, laughing about the antics of ***** Nilly and 2 Dollar Bill but Luke Warm is iffy about what he views.
         Rock Bottom, that sad sack, tries his luck with Miss Matched, getting nowhere and is unhappy to see Ray O’Sunshine barge into the conversation as he orders Mart Ini to join in with Lazy Susan.
         Uh oh, here comes ****** Mary with Mel N. Choley who has the nerve to tell Pete Moss he smells.
         Terri Yaki sits with Will Power who, dieting, will not eat. They sit at the same table as Rich N Glamorous, Patty Melt and Miss Quoted.
         Here’s where it gets weird --- Ben E Fit cannot get away from Polly Amorous who pursues him relentlessly while he tries to put moves on the audacious Bo Dacious.
         Hugh Tensils and the aptly named Nick Named joyously interact with Deb It and Dad Nabit, narrowly escaping a falling chandelier which is prevented from harming anyone by Nick O’Time, who is always in the right place at the right time.
         Ty ****, known for being parsimonious hangs with Corporal Punishment, an unwelcome party crasher
          Ray Gun seeks out Phil Anderer to ask about the latest concoction of his pal Al Chemy, learning that he been experimenting with Joy Ride, Long John and Phil Istine.
          Justice Delayed and Justice Denied sit at separate tables refusing to interact with each other.
Oddly enough even
when frolicking in the autumn mist
with seasoned super tramping
cheaply tricked out goo goo dolls
some resembling Indigo Girls,
one foo fighting beastie boy
unable to adjust snoozing
on the left bedside.

Don't ask me why,
cuz we (all the barenaked ladies
who gifted me
with their uncommon
sense and sensibility) did make
a conscientious effort and try
behind closed doors to pry
ourselves loose from convention
impossible mission to modify behavior
indelibly etched in consciousness
since being knee-high,
each of us sought safety secured
snuggled in the ***** of mommy dearest
in an effort to thwart the bogeyman,
whose breastworks did protect and electrify
with severe shock
aforementioned unwanted intruder.

Even as an older kid shelter sought
against adversity climbing into bed
particularly our favorite parent's side
to skedaddle away from wild things
roam'n the hallways
nightmarish creatures prowled
even bravest in the family did dread
of course when lights flicked on
they (scary fiends) fled,
no matter monsters

solely residing in the head,
especially if male offspring
sung at length about courtesy
Eminem and Rihanna
and christened Jed
(which from the Hebrew
translated means beloved of god)
the second or "blessing" name
given by God
through the prophet Nathan

in infancy to Solomon,
second son of
King David and Bathsheba,
whose steely mettle
exemplary existence he led
I prized, honored, coveted,
et cetera his as a newlywed,
when me and the missus our troth we pled
unwaveringly, unstintingly, unhesitatingly,
and unconditionally accepted
the marriage vows read

to us courtesy Henry J. Schireson
a Pennsylvania magisterial district judge
for Montgomery County Magisterial District
nevertheless yours truly
violated sacred covenant,
and traipsed, tiptoed, and tallied
with **** wacker through the tulips
(analogous for illicit extramarital liaisons),
where angels feared to tread.

Courtesy William Congreve's
'The Mourning Bride' (1697) I quote
"Heaven has no rage
like love to hatred turned,
nor Hell a fury like a woman scorned."

The permanent contra dance partner
accepted viz justice of the peace
legal asseveration as thee wife
July twenty twenty fifth
nineteen ninety six
none to pleased to discover visa vis
her husband prided himself
on discreet rendezvous,
which multiple escapades
donning Lothario role,
nevertheless found yours truly
inexplicably witnessing himself,
albeit non verbally communicating
courtesy tactile pillow talk

while I situated myself
er lied supinely as Phil Anderer
on the right side facing
nexus, lexus and lectus
which last mentioned word
could be single bed for one person
or double for a couple;
sometimes made of bronze
and often made of wood
and decorated with moldings
of mother of pearl or bronze,
and animal-like legs:
the more simple ones
constituted of terracotta.

Said aforementioned experience
being Casanova went awry
major adjustment to appease
and whet appetite of paramour
lost moxie to do the wild thang
after premature ejaculations
plus fount of endearments went dry
guilt riddled conscience
(people who have been chosen
from the general public
to listen to the facts about a crime)
**** read hung jury
namely cuz ******* consummated,

which unbridled ****** fricassee
clamored to alleviate celibate state,
an August occasion even
during dead of winter ~2010
frisky antics betook me,
(who convinced married gal
I met thru Craigslist personals)
to infamous “**** rock”
at Valley Forge National Park
schlepping over and across
knee deep ice and snow,
one ***** goat
to attain ******* Harris fulfillment
didst precariously vie.

Although adultery, cupidity,
felicity, infidelity, et cetera
undermined, ostracized husband,
hijacked harmony, and
aggravated twenty seven years
of potential wedded bliss
(even harder to bring to fruition
than conceiving offspring),
neither the missus nor myself
(the mister re: man, an android at heart)
could not succumb to our slumbers
baiting, counting, dreaming
of electric sheep futile

upon testing, jump/kickstarting,
experimenting, et cetera
whereupon I lied supine upon
the left side (facing the bed),
and she attempted
to await the dream weaver
comfortably sprawled out
on the right side,
yet both of us wide awake
after the bewitching hour,
henceforth we resigned ourselves
as creatures of habit
to reclaim zzz land territory.
Introduction: once again I incorporate
my trademark penchant
to fabricate fictitiously
portions of the following poetic endeavor
can you care to
discern fact from fiction?

Attempts at lifelong friendships and holy matrimony...

Shot thru with figuratively cankerous nub,
cuz yours truly did flub
even though as a scouting cub
how yours truly - alias Phil Anderer
committed faux paw unlike me papa bear,
he set admirable example
sidestepping and skirting carnal temptation,
(****** one... two...; ****** one... two...)
squelching roaring testosterone
against succumbing, rutting, quieting
call of the wild desire meaning
inevitably envisioning seducing,
mounting, kissing, caressing...
receptive quite pleasing gals,
nonetheless merely fending off such
verboten enticement left him panting.

Think surrendering to playful kibitizing
as kickstarter to hanky panky;
said violation against matrimonial covenant,
thwarting potential indiscretion subsequently
linkedin with Capital one aplomb.

I never bore witness
seeing me dada caught
in sexually compromised contretemps
to any aforementioned high fidelity hubbub,
yet his sole male offspring (me)
begat courtesy Harriet and Boyce,
(but one minor tidbit to share,
neither father nor mother physically alive
they long since passed away
to Elysian Fields)
found their one and only son - nada faithful
blithely nixing pledged troth,
which rent asunder filial bond

between self and precious progeny
plus provoked wrathful ire
and eventually forgiving soul of thee missus,
nevertheless her heartfelt
initial fury at discovery
of absent husband from Bryn Mawr quarters
didst activate pulse
to throb considerably faster
and louder than usual subdued lub dub
and even at present
when daring to discuss
mine moonlighting one night tryst
as Casanova wannabe, which
hard drive of mine generated message
Abort, Retry, Fail?

Though ***** never freed
flagellated empowered gamete sea men
despite libido being shifted to high gear;
****** ******* never consummated,
nor ****** ******* bliss experienced
much less allowed, enabled and provided
ditto the recipient of mine adulterous affections.
Far fetched fanciful whim
(hard to believe) fallacy
complicity, excitedly, and willfully
following imaginative thought,
though following whim never expressed,
but how rousing, spellbinding,
tantalizing the thought of foreplay
exciting, fondling, goading
receptive flirtatious paramour,
an alluring mistress of color
to attempt and strategize my abduction
as random human trafficked heist
held prisoner until an undisclosed
sum of ransom money
delivered to the captors.

The wife ofttimes references taboo subject
regarding aborted love affair
(alluding to side piece as underhanded gibe)
upon being probed, questioned, and raked
over figurative coals with intimate queries.

These mild interrogations
trigger a sudden uptick
in voluminous silence;
tick tock transpires soundlessness
spikes male level lent rub,
between one once randy husband
and grateful wife; she exhibited forgiveness;
how virtuous ma lady accepting spouse,
which whole frisky fiasco
(on a Freaky Friday)
fostered felicitous flagrante delicto
induced reciprocal black barbs upon psyches
their paternal parent inflicted.

Although antics unbecoming
monogamous kickstarted, declared, and avowed
essentially compromising legally binding union
long since ceased
(matter of fact yesterday April 21st, 2022
me and the missus
went shopping at BJ's. Whole Club
200-C Mill Rd, Oaks, PA 19456),
the psychological fallout
still indelibly etched.

Tumultuous emotions roiled
driving past long gone
home of me childhood
324 Level Road no longer exists,
yet chuckful of memories
flooded mine consciousness
flashback triggered gamut
of existential trials and tribulations.

As a youngster behavior of yours truly
(i.e. mine) never purportedly "bad"
rather reserved, I gave no indication
then how such a cute beastie boy
when becoming acculturated
within loving family provenance
versus disaster later married life evinced
displayed, exhibited, and flaunted
characteristics antithetical, diabolical,
heretical, and piratical
(so much for hyperbole)
par excellence of an exemplary cad,
a most definite poor example

and embarrassment of one
good for nothing dad
to two adorable daughters,
who deserved better egad
myself as basket of deplorable
father figure in retrospect me not glad
carrying on illicit affair
trying to compensate
while cultivating the row
(elle) regarding husbandry
during and post pubescence
never going out on date,
nor kissing an attractive lass,

when poet of Perkiomen Valley
scores of years ago
besotted with anguish
extremely, governed as introvertedly,
and painfully shy lad,
(he knew nothing about
powder milk biscuits)
and more or less describes himself
during his adolescence as a "wallflower"
self deprivation concerning experiencing
life, liberty, and pursuit of happiness
found aging logophile mad
at himself missing out

on typical social/interpersonal casual forays
donned in fashionable dungarees and plaid
fast forward to mein kampf as unhappily wed
whereby hours spent
(rather wasted) posting
and answering personal classifieds
for female assignations
numbering well into bajillions
in other words quite a scad
only countless lunar months ex post facto
did sincere regret prevail
mooch more'n a tad;
dalliances involving barenaked ladies
costing inxs of any legal tender ***.

— The End —