IF,
All of a sudden,
   you feel lonesome in a crowd of people on the New Years day at Times Square
     you feel that chill crawl up your neck to your eyes on warm summer day
             you suddenly feel scared, afraid, and cold
                      You feel UNWORTHY, UNLOVED, NEGLECTED, IGNORED, SCARED

                 Then,
can
                   we
be
.....................................................
friends?

Hush now, baby,
No need to cry,
You're finished here
And you've said goodbye.

What are you waiting for?
There's nothing left here,
And where you're going
There's nothing to fear.

'Nobody cares'
So go to sleep
You won't be here
To see us weep.

What could you have
possibly expected us to do?
How could we have saved you
When nobody knew?

Us together
Us against the world
Then you're gone
You had to be a hero in someone's eyes
Mine must not have been big enough

I’m the first to die
As the story goes.
My body’s wrapped in clay
Stranded empty pain
And it lasts, you know.
I got out the shame
And you know it’s all the same.
With your holy hands
That are shakin’, shakin’.
And you know it’s all the same.
Come with me, step away from here,
And you’re runnin’, runnin’.
But now you start to sleep,
Don’t remember how to feel,
You just settle, settle.
Strangers gather round,
And the passage is read,
I can touch you again.

A bird sings
A flower grows
The squirrels flick their tails and scold
The sun stays longer
The wind blows
And life begins

Your hands easy
weight, teasing the bees
hived in my hair, your smile at the
***** of my cheek. On the
occasion, you press
above me, glowing, spouting
readiness, mystery rapes
my reason

When you have withdrawn
your self and the magic, when
only the smell of your
love lingers between
my *******, then, only
then, can I greedily consume
your presence.

Bound and determined,
determined
to find the part of me
that I lost.

Looking at your sleeping face,
I feel as though
it's in you.

You encompass who I am,
who I was
and who I will be.

I found myself in you,
bound and determined.

You cannot frighten me
(A demon that had dimmed)
I am not scared of you
(Awakens every time I encounter you)
In spite of your spite
(Reminds me that a rest)
Your venom, your vitriol
(Is not as good as a change)

You are not the monster
(I am undone in your company)
We make you out to be
(Everything I want to be)
Screaming, thrashing
(Lies patiently at my side)
Lashing out
(As my past unfurls ahead of me)

Re-hashing conversations
(‘I thought....you’d gone?’ I whisper, pleadingly)
Re-presenting words in new ways
(‘Not yet’, you stretch, luxuriously)
Our days are difficult with you
(‘There’s more here to be done.’)
But what are they compared to yours?
(I sigh. It’s not a huge surprise)

Fighting everyone to be right
(I’m twenty-nine, not twenty know-it-all)
Your actions drown out everyone
(There’s still a lot to learn, un-do)
Even your words are lost
(And always will be...)
In the wake of your fury
(Do you see?)

You’re fooling no-one but your own
(You cannot frighten me)
And not for long
(No-one scares me more than myself)

Lying in a field of grass
wasting time, you and I.
Our thoughts shifting and drifting,
watching the clouds pass by.

The trees whisper gently
as the breeze ripples and winds,
joining in our conversation,
helping us pass the time.

Sometimes I stare at your profile.
Sometimes you glance my way.
Sometimes we clasp hands.
Sometimes we dance and sway.

Life seems so sweet and simple
as the sun sets in the sky.
Glancing, talking, laughing,
and watching the clouds pass by.