Unfortunately I cannot truly say I am over you

it's not true, you know it too.
You know me too well, it's too true.

Your believable stupid lies
I was stupid to believe.

Your eyes follow me across a room
Across a room I follow you.

Pathetic. Regret it. Forget it.

I can't.

I'm under you.

Oh please do forget me and I will forget you.

Forget the nights you held me in your arms,

the nights we laid like spoons with the breath of alcohol on our lips.

Don't remember the way I watch you with your guitar,

I won't remember the notes you played for me.

Erase the memories of every sorry you ever said to me,

because you never were.

Keep the secrets I told you,

until you don't recall who told you to keep them.

Don't look for me in the crowd,

Look for my smile instead.

You won't ever find it.

Please forget who I am.
Because if you do maybe I'll forget you.

Why do I keep thinking of you

It doesn't matter anymore, I shouldn't like you

I hate you, yet for some reason thoughts of you lurk in my mind

We were friends, now what? Nothing?

What happened between us, only we know

Actually only you, I'm still confused

It wasn't that long

A summer wasted

I fell in a trap

Caught in what was seemingly untrue

And you.

What could possibly drift in your head?

Do you ever think of me, will you ever?

Everyone knows nothing

No one knows who you are exactly

What thoughts race through you

They don't understand you

Nether do I.

You told me, and I told you a lot.

You listened, you remembered even.

Now what?

Do you still ever think of me

Like I do of you?

It seems to me

I'm always left

Here

Just here, standing

A small piece

Of you, for awhile

Happens every time

I'm left here

Waiting for what?

You to come back?

No. Never.

Just waiting to be left again

And again

Here.

You placed your hand on the small of my back. A spot I’d thought no one would fit. My hand gripped your waist almost for fear of losing you. The world surrounding us seemed to disappear. It was only me and you in that moment. A tear now shed. I believed in anything in that moment. Cold-hearted. Young. Unsure of what was right in society. When your hand released me, I was hurt. Seconds later you brought it back again along with that moment. I’ll long for that moment every time I seem to fall for someone. Maybe a moment that could last a lifetime. A moment that could be destroyed by no one because it was finally meant to be. How could you fall in love so many times and fall in the trap of that moment?

What happened between us

a moment

wasted time

nervous hearts

confusion that seems to last

longer than it should

Are you confused?

A misunderstanding.

Too many thoughts of you,

It's not fair.

Stress. Anxiety.

Thinking too much,

believing nothing.

Not too sure

about you

what you could possibly be feeling.

How are you not affected?

Awkwardness.

Is it building?

What will happen next?

You're calling shots,

unless there's nothing that happened

in this crime scene.

Unsolved.

Memories saved

pictures kept

drawings hidden

loves began

loves lost

everything,

nothing.

No delete button

you can't turn back

instead move forward

once you're gone

you're truly gone.

Everything,

nothing.