Drip, drop
percolate
coffee-***
fill my cup
warm my soul
pick me up
CAFFEINE
awake now
Get-up
get ready
light on my
FEET
from the
DARK
grounds
Giving me
ENERGY
to go the
ROUNDS
Life serves
Imagine
life without
COFFEE
uh ,,,,
are you crazy
I rather not
NO THANK YOU !
We would be
so lazy
TIRED
versus
WIRED
eyes
half asleep
not able
to
WAKE UP
so as I
get my
SECOND CUP
I just
want to say
How
GRATEFUL
I am
For this
DRUG

Signs unnoticed on 
purpose 
A familiar reflection of 
guilt 
Change needed but never 
planned 
Fears of possibly failing 
preventing 
Motivation from kicking 
in 
Mediocre is all i'll ever 
be 
Caught in the middle 
of 
Heaven and Hell until the day 
comes 
Suspense of thee unknown
comforting 
One question still with no 
answer 
Was I created, born or
raised 
THIS WAY, WHO IS RESPONSIBLE?
FOR MY MISFORTUNES?
WHO?

Internal warfare 
MENTALLY 
EMOTIONALLY
External warfare 
PHYSICALLY 
MENTALLY 
EMOTIONALLY 
Im not in the Military 
but why does it feel 
we abide by the 
DONT ASK DONT TELL 
AS A WHOLE 
AS A COUNTRY 
AS A WORLD
Im tired of bleeding
Im sick of temporary fixes 
I want to :
PERMANENTLY CHANGE

I miss her
She misses me
When we’re together
we can be us
But that’ll never happen
and it’s not because
OF US
but rather
All the in-between
that refuses
To allow
OUR
stars to shine
TOGETHER
So we remain
amidst the same sky
DULL
amidst the same WHY?
hidden from our light
Amidst the same
LIFE
but separated
By the in-between

PUNCH PACKED POETIC WRITE

PUNCH FELT REALISTIC FIGHT

PAIN INSIDE AND OUTSIDE THIS MIND

LET IT OUT, POETIC WRITE

LET IT OUT, REALISTIC FIGHT

He kicked the can
far before the keg kicked

He drank himself
until he drowned

Literally his last breath
was spent at this bar

Right before his last cent
he was broke in many ways

His days started at open
his nights began at close

Only leaving room for
a drunken walk and sleep

His spirits were always hi
until the spirits went bye

A rowdy guy he could be
when others spoke to thee

He was a lonely man
sorrow built up caked his face

Cold brews washed it down
as foam covered his chin

He knew his limits though
never touching the liquor

The beer numbed the pain
the brews calmed the temper

A good tipper indeed he was
but now he's gone from us

He kicked the can
far before the keg kicked

The pub still lives on
from open to close

His lack of presence
remains the biggest difference

He was a lonely man
that found comfort at

The bottom of every glass
he had ever ordered

But was it genuine habit
or was it out of pattern

I never the courage to ask
I never the care to speak up

Is life moving to fast
for us to take the time

I'm no therapist, I remind myself
but merely a tender of the bar

However I still feel guilt
knowing I filled the last mug

Meaningless words dealt
fake "how you do's"

It turns out, until he was gone
I never valued his soul

He was a lonely man
but now so am I

He kicked the can
far before the last keg kicked

And now I'm left
kicking myself in the ***

For never becoming
a good friend
​​​​​

Early resentment
from working long hours
blame pointed towards
each other's direction
Pain felt forever

Late resentment
from the forever pain
still causing havoc in
each other's direction
Pain felt forever

I use my hands 
to act out 
Non-violently 
I use my hands
to hold my pen 
Non-violently 
I use my hands 
to hold my notepad 
Non-violently 
As quickly as 
thoughts surface 
Non-violently 
words are written 
creating more space 
Non-violently 
relieving stress 
In a healthy way 
Non-violently 
before I discovered 
this healthy outlet 
VIOLENCE 
tried to take over 
with the same hands 
Violently 
Against myself physically 
and others emotionally 
Violently 
My hands prefer 
writing as opposed to 
FIGHTING 
Violently 
I use my hands 
to share with others 
Non-violently 
That they too
can fight the fight 
Through Writing 
NON-VIOLENTLY 
and use their hands 
to take a stand against 
ABUSE

My
interior is superior
to my
exterior is inferior
My
internal is eternal
to my
external is ephemeral
But
you don't want
to get
to know the
REAL ME
superficial

I seek the truth only
that doesn’t mean I’m lost though
I just want reality

I pretend to forget
kids are starving 
I have a sports car 
a badass truck
I make 120k a year 
doing what I love 
I own a camper 
I can park anywhere 
I have a condo
in Michigan 
and stay in 5 star hotels 
all across the country 
But yet theres people
with no running water 
So to tell you 
I struggle with faith 
shouldnt leave you puzzled 
How can I have all of this
Knowing some have nothing 
and to the ones
that feel good they give 
I bet its never enough 
to help all out 
but yet still 
you are doing just fine 
Is this our fault 
or is it even mine 
That this mind 
OF MINE 
works this way
Maybe it is, maybe its 
NOT 
who really ******* knows 
I work hard 
but to some 
thats not even 
an option 
FrEeDoM isnt FREE 
when you have a conscious

my feelings
YOUR FEELINGS

MY EFFORT
your effort

tsap ym
YOUR PAST


Yeah my past
was ****** up

Well I’m not
YOUR PROBLEM ANYMORE

FREE
eerf

"Love cannot be lost however it can be taken"

One bad decision 
may cost an entire life 
only one mistake

Beware it truly exists

Danger when it stares

Just stay hidden amongst the world

You don’t want to be spotted
or SINGLED OUT

Its watching us all BIG, small,
T
A
L
L

Any and all

You , me
him, her
and THEM

Power of three
triangle strongest shape
with three sides
3 stooges
3 little pigs
Big bad wolf
3 houses
or The most famous
“Third time is the charm “
let’s not forget
ABC to market the alphabet

123 to market the numbers

I know the powers of three , but do you

YOU
HIM
HER

Three words with 3 letters to cover all the sexes

Don’t take the 3 for granted

Don’t let the THIRD EYE
catch you OFF GUARD

1.Through him
2. with him
3. in him

1. G 2. O 3. D
GOD

Or
Lets

Not
FORGET

Mom, Dad, Dog, Cat

The list goes on

1. seconds 2. minutes 3. hours

1. days 2. months 3. years

Feet , inches , centimeters

Every Ruler READS

Spark , ignite, flame
123

Warm yourself up
here we go
its to easy
creating A poem
writing all verses
with 3 words
every single time

3.....2.......1........
AND BLAST OFF
here we go
space ship rocket
Off in sky
to another planet
to be victim
to the 3
and the power
it truly has
they too will
worship and follow
THE THIRD EYE

To think all the inner issues
and the questions they bring

Are solved by outer solutions
and the answers they bring

Deepthoughts
caughtin
MoTiOn R
             a
               P
             i
          D
               l
            Y
    d
   O
   w
Unaturally
\                  /
   \             /
      \idea/
       BORN

TRUST
frisbee
thrown
GONE

PAIN
medicine-ball
thrown
HEAVY

HEARTBREAK
boomerang
thrown
RETURNED

Time will tell
tall tales of fate
REGARDLESS
My thoughts
or ideas of us
REMINDER
We cannot
predict the future
REALITY
We may be
mad at eachother  
RIGHT-NOW
But who knows
what tomorrow brings
REASSURANCE
So stop with
the preconceived notions
REMEMBER
Time can heal
all our wounds

Timing in life is 
EVERYTHING
Lining my life up 
CONTINUOSLY 
******* my life away
OCCASIONALLY 
Life is all timing 
EVERYTIME
Life lines up 
CONTRADICTION 
Life ****** on me
OCCASIONALLY

Time tells all tales 
What once was thought 
What once was heard 
May not always be the truth 
Time tells all tales 
Time releases the truth 
What once was thought 
What once was heard 
May not be easy to think about
May not always be easy to hear
Time tells all tales 
Time heals all wounds

​...........              |
                         |    MOTIVATION
                         |   ___
                    《   》
    TIME
__      |
​​​                        |
       ­                v
                  《    》
            ----------------------

Ti­me weighing down
My motivation
As I attempt to accomplish
My goals in life
Time weighing down
My morals
As I attempt to live honestly
My expiring life
Time weighing down
My ambitions
As I attempt to overcome
My fear for lost time
TIME

Be taught to teach
learn to educate

Be abused to abuse
learn to hate

Be forgiven to forgive
learned to late

0-60 in 3.4 seconds
0-heartbreak in 4.5 years

Covered in sin
torn again
feel felt found
DISCOVERED
the truth never
uncovered
falsely labeled
DAMAGED
Covered in doubt
hurt again
all fingers pointing
BLAMED
the lies always
NAMED
unknown strangers
to me
But no one
will believe me
So I remain quiet
and let them all
think they won
LOSER

Menu diluted
open to all
I go to
the meat case
and face only
the best cuts
CORNDANCE TAVERN
home of
locally sourced meats
handpicked, only by
THE BEST
Also known for their
BOURBON
Meat and Liquor
AGED to
PERFECTION
paired with
four cheese asparagus
along with Yukon Potatoes
and a much needed
craft beer:
ZOMBIE DUST
I know most parents
hate school shopping
but I enjoy it
especially when it’s time
for LUNCH

I'm the main character 
of this horrible book
Titled: LIFE 
I deny every single word 
of this horrible book
About my life 

LIES LIES LIES 

I'm the main character 
of this horrible life 
Documented by myself 
Titled: LIFE
I wrote every single word 
of this horrible book 

TRUE TRUE TRUE 

Non-fictional 
THE TRUTH HURTS

Its just another day 
the weatherman
is calling for SuNsHiNe
but Im still feeling 
teardrops of rain
its just another day 
the weatherman
is calling for clear skies 
but Im still feeling 
shades of gray
DEPRESSED
STRESSED
Sadness replaces 
happiness 
Emotions drown
blending together 
NUMB the background
Silence sounds 
all love is lost
the cost 
paid in FULL
time gone 
Never to be replaced 
faced with 
traces of 
past trauma
building up
to much to overcome 
Easier to just 
GIVE-UP 
Yeah the weatherman 
called this day wrong 
for people like
you and me

Watch, listen and read...... those are others actions, voices and words!

Do, speak and write...... those are your actions, voice and words!

Everything you do should have purpose in life.

Everything in life should have meaning.

Time is to valuable to not invest it wisely!

Pay close attention because close attention costs you.

Whether you realize it or not, I promise you they do!

Confused 
not about “ The who “
but more about 
“ The time “
Everyone knows 
it has always been 
her, yes you !
JENNIFER 
What has seemed 
like a lifetime, 
a true eternity 
in reality has been 
less than a year 
Every minute apart 
my heart has desired 
to be near, back within 
arms reach, next to you 
Your name, still engraved 
on my arm, our horoscopes 
still etched on my shoulder 
My eyes still wandering 
looking for the face 
that made my heart race 
uninterested in the rest 
By far this has been 
the hardest test 
to discover yourself 
re-invent an entire life 
filled with disarray 
Overcoming years 
of fears, drowning in tears 
from missing her love 
and still managing 
to become better, 
day by day 
and the only answer 
that makes any of it 
make sense and possible:
Its all because of You!
My motivation 
my lost companion 
my best friend 
my safe haven 
my guardian Angel 
You’re gone now 
lost in time 
like a princess
trapped in a tower,
guarded by a dragon 
feeling cursed 
waiting for Prince Charming 
I lost your love 
as an ungrateful peasant 
not knowing 
how to care for 
the love I needed 
and desired 
but since then 
my life journey 
DISCOVERY 
Has taught me 
of much needed 
LESSONS
Has granted me 
of much needed 
COURAGE 
I’m no longer him 
he has transformed 
from an insecure boy 
to a knight and shinning armor 
PREPARED to battle 
and slay the dragon 
SAVING you 
from a life 
away from your 
PARTNER 
Releasing you 
from feeling captive 
Unleashing our 
old love, replenishing 
our purpose in life 
CREATING 
​​​​​​​A HAPPILY EVER AFTER

Emotions
twirling
Insecurities
swirling
Heart
hurting
Mind
wandering
Thoughts
crossing
Fears
absorbing
Pain
resulting
In
my
LIFE
journey

Subconscious winds 
voicing opposite directions 
Emotions temperature 
heated to ice cold 

Thoughts tornadoes 
my heads spinning 
Decisions flawed 
lightning and thunder 

My life 
one big storm 
Mentally speaking 
where's the sunshine 

Unfamiliar weather 
atleast for now 
There's tomorrow 
I remain optimistic 

Regardless now 
weathering these storms 
Regardless now 
weathering these thoughts

My life 
ONE BIG STORM 
My thoughts 
l
o
n
g

f
o
r

s
u
n
s
h
i
n
e

She wants loved 
but doesnt know 
what it means 
to be loved 
unconditionally 
She wants loved 
but doesnt know 
love isnt all give,
Its a give and take 
to be loved 
She wants loved 
or so she thinks 
her idea of what
love means 
is far from fact 
She wants loved 
I see years of pain 
amidst her eyes 
as the words pour out 
when she vents to me 
She wants to be loved 
she is so oblivious though 
not realizing her and I
have been more intimate 
through deep conversations 
that required no strings 
because I want her to know...
I want to love 
and I want to be loved  
I know what it means 
to be loved unconditionally
so for that reason 
I will continue to be 
PATIENT 
Knowing past love lost 
has taught me 
greater pain is endured 
through the loss of love 
than the sacrifice to love slow
She is loved
but she just doesnt know 
because for once 
she is in control 
with no pressure or 
hidden agendas 
She is loved 
but who knows 
how long it will take 
for her to realize 
the beauty through my eyes 
from her eyes reflection of 
PAIN 
I LOVE HER 
I WANT LOVE 
I WANT TO BE LOVED 
SHE WANTS LOVE 
SHE HAS IT 
BUT WILL SHE EVER KNOW 
THATS FOR HER TO DECIDE 
OF LOVE TO BECOME 
OR FOR IT TO FADE 
I KNOW I LOVE HER 
BECAUSE IM REMAINING 
TO BE A GOOD FRIEND 
NOT KNOWING 
IF SHE WILL FEEL 
THE SAME 
LOVE IS UNCONDITIONAL

You’re an adult but miss being a kid , tired of a life requiring responsibility to get far

You decide to hide from it all and commit to just being a big kid but how with no toys

When you were younger your toys were your friends , stuffed animals and action figures

Before meeting you they all were nameless and hostage to a lonely retailers shelf

You felt connected as a mother giving birth to a childhood as you gave them purpose

Naming each and everyone, allowing them to tag along in all of your adventures

But that was then and this is now, how ridiculous you would appear with made up pals

Voiceless and choice-less, it’s just not the same kind of fun it was in your childhood

So now you contemplate and sit and ponder, it suddenly hits you like a bag of bricks: LEGOS

Toys with hearts is what you desire, with brains, with voices and real life emotions

So quickly you get excited realizing the possibilities of a completely filled toy-box

Is it fair to them to use them for your satisfaction as you toy with their emotions for fun

Nicer to some than others but the ultimate mission is to get them to ride your coattail

Never out for their benefit but rather yours as you see them as your childhood toys

At your dispersement as you see fit for your emotions and personal self benefits  

And when they realize it and get fed up, they move on but your not bothered by this at all

Because just as a child it was only a matter of time before you outgrew them one by one

Then on to the next big hit, the next big trend and the old toys left to take the hit, ALONE

Well these real life toys have hearts and it’s just not the same as they are being tore apart

But you could careless as you witness the pain and agony you force them to face

As they lay in pieces astray, your mind has already moved on , gone without a trace

Well in time this may seem to work as you get your socks off to others hurt

But the reality is the play dates will come and go but before you know it’ll be to late

You’re a narcissist, not a kid and the real victims aren’t your friends but rather you

They tried to help and tried to get you to see but your to into yourself to ever care

A lifetime of new acquaintances is your life sentence as you are always losing loved ones

All the misfits you have offended all pray for the day you can finally grow up

Because regardless the pain you have caused them they are toys with hearts

They bleed, they cry, they can relate, they can hate but they choose not too

Because your not worth any of their emotions and that’s why you don’t deserve

Toys with hearts because there’s no such thing, it just doesn’t exist

They are people and you’re a
F❤️CKING NARCISSIST, with an empty toy box

You don't know
what you've been
TOLD
You don't know
what you've been
SOLD
Trust no one
dissect it all
LEARN
Trust no one
dissect it all
EARN

Relapse
GREEN LIGHT
Success
STOP SIGN
Think
YELLOW LIGHT
Plan
RED LIGHT
Grow
GREEN LIGHT
Battle
RAILROAD TRACKS
Stop or Go
CROSSBARS DOWN
Decide

"Mentality plays" roles on sexuality, what "we find" attractive may be "fueled by" encounters with trauma.

Lack of love translates to "someone who chases", much love might look like someone being "taken for granted."

These are comparisons in the "lightest form", I have alot of real life experiences with the "darkest forms." imagined

What makes you attractive is the question to "ask yourself." Make sure to "be honest!"

"Don't feel bad if" you don't  offer much, "I had no answer" when I asked "MYSELF FIRST"

This soul has never been complete, this soul was destined to compete, this soul refuses to continuously repeat itself, defeat it will never accept, failures it will continue to ***** knowing its one life closer to success, this soul will forever live on in better light, each century it takes on leaves the next century better off, this soul will never die, this soul of mine will forever live on! This soul will forever be convicted, this soul will eternally be guilty until I prove it to be innocent, this soul will break all the man made rules backed by man made statistics fuel by man made mathematics, justified with man made knowledge and when it does all others will realize 99'/, of life is all just *******!

Abracadabra
YOU’RE GONE

But wait
PEEK A BOO
I see you

HIDE AND SEEK
you say
COME FIND ME

But that was then
THE MAGIC
Is now gone
SO I’M NOT
Looking for you
ANYMORE

The final trick
I LET YOU PLAY
To cut my
HEART INTO TWO

But the ****** part
YOU KNEW
All along
THE PAIN
The hurt
YOUR INABILITY
To reverse
THE TRICK

Now I remain
IN PIECES
Without your
PRESENCE

Like a rabbit
ABANDONED
From a magicians hat
NEVER RETURNED
Back home
DISCARDED
As soon as
THE SHOW WAS OVER
No use
NO PLEASURE
Just a prop
TO YOUR AUDIENCE
A complete fake romance
OF FALSE LOVE

Our eyes mirrors     THROUGH
we look to the light                  I
to reflect God’s eyes              M
shinning bright
CONNECTED
As our eyes reflect    
the strength of                 WITH
the Holy Ghost                       I
directly to our soul               M
CLEANSED
The blood of Christ        
his only son runs                 H
through our veins                IN
pumping life                        M
SACRIFICE
The last part needed
only you can decide
for yourself
FAITH

She’s a ****** bro
no she’s not, she had a son
well so did Mary

Love me
or leave me
She said
Dead
gone
LOST
the cost
my pride

Druggy illegal under the table not from behind the counter, does it make a difference? Regardless a prescription they all can become addictive, they all can make you dependent.

Popularity doesn’t make mental health healthy

Nor does being unpopular

but learning to be yourself and being happy with who that is .....well that creates growth !

You’re saved
she is
he is too
Keep being
YOURSELF
and I’ll keep
rooting for you

The machines governor dictates its performance
The mans Governor
dictates his performance

Please don’t ask for it
   I promise you can earn it
          It’ll just take time

I loved everyone 
until I was born 
Then I hated most
anger was born 
From the loss 
of the love 
It wasn't me 
it was always them 
But it was me 
that had to change 
Thank God I did 
thank them for it 
It wasn't me 
it wasn't him

Adrenaline preventing the pain from hurting, fueling anger but now I’m no longer in shock and the longer I go without her the more pain I feel internally, Memories force a relapse in behavior from old emotions resurfacing, pulling and pushing thoughts, tugging on my heart, where to start when it comes to healing..... God only knows, LOST

You're so smart, you know it all! Every question in life, you provide a quick answer for everytime. Do this for me, just one time! Think about living a life that requires no response....... A life lived where every single decision is obviously justified! Think about that, just for one time! That's when you hit the jackpot you're living a good life! Time invested to others thoughts, just aren't necessary nor are they scary because the decisions are right! The kind of life where karna is multiplied and not divided, the kind of life that makes you proud to lead and live! The kind of moral compass that never leads to feeling threatened!  That's the kind of thoughts I'm having, those are the kind of decisions I'm making and no mistaking these feelings that back them..........ever!
Because they are real!