happy new year
and with it all its promises
to be broken

where are they
you know the ones
with smiles so tight it causes their face to crack
the pretty-evil
while others walk the razors edge
they've dulled it

i dream
from it i've drawn a shapeless being
colored outside the lines
i did not give it a mouth to speak
but i see its monsters grin

its stood in the backways
it though me how to lie
convinced me loneliness would be my only comfort
i listened
i feel fine

look at me
look me in they eyes
i am not your savior
you've confused our friendship
for something much more than what i can provide
and for that
i am truly sorry

wash my hands
wear my mask
eyes down
keep away

canceled parties
postponed weddings
crushed dreams
lost memories

lock the door
draw the blinds
netflix, are you still watching?
yes, stop asking

January first
a brand new day
who are we kidding
its only the beginning

i'm about to combine my hobby, passion and career into one
the job that keeps food on my table
my kids table
i'm horrified

good morning
skipping breakfast
and start the day
push till lunch
skipping lunch
grind till dinner
ill have dinner
end the day
half hour till liftoff
the best and saddest part of the day