Soros' monkeys stole an election
in the greatest country ever!
Soros was richer than God so
he bribed monkeys everywhere
to turn keys and throw feces. He
erased religion. He replaced god with
small jealous men with small *****,
huge egos and armies of useful idiots.

I'm 68
   lessons learn
   accepted fate
   bridges burn
   no more hate
   worms do turn
   not too late
   for you I yearn

Do it again? Remember that,
back before we both got fat?
I'd rather eat food than you.
A fortune cookie maybe true.

In summer's tall green grass
  we planned our picnic hidden
  from God's all seeing eye
  to hide our secret forbidden
  we gave our virginity away
  as one at the altar of blood
  radio troubadour serenaded
  our marriage baptized flood.

Asleep. I'm 93
I had to ***.
I wet my bed,
sunrise dead.

I harbor a sadness in my heart
I wish I could destroy but time
stops before it has time to start.
It's gravity heavy in my own bed
with God's fierce sinner's weight
I broke my vows we wed now dead.

What comes next?
Chicken or egg?
The Bible's text?
The starving beg?
New world order?
****'s final Jew?
erase the last border
**** us by the *****.

I'm eleven at midnight Mass
  on a precipice of awareness
  girls somehow make me warmer
  I wonder if I can be a charmer
  my heart races Christ is born
  I see **** and lips I am torn
  stand kneel sit pray page eight
  worlds come and go never wait.

I fell off the Earth awhile ago.
I'm floating in time and space.
Time's never ticked so **** slow.
I think I recognize this place.
My lovers wait in beds for me
on fire with hate where I burn
I'll visit you with bent knee
and love you with all I learn

To yank a soul out
of nonexistence into
this meat and to force
a life into this thresher
my child died painless
still inside my innocence
she spared me the sin
of having been a father.

The weight of it
makes me a statue
unable to move
know what's true
I love you but it
dies on the vine
guilt kills it all
dreams live in wine.
I float in rain
dance on the drops
lessens the pain
connects the dots.

Poetry is a sick child
when you forget yourself.
Poetry is addiction
when you can't breathe.
Poetry is madness
when you doubt sanity.
Poetry is a boy hit by a car
broke leg at 5 chasing dad.
Poetry is a girl
loving a broke boy.
Poetry is a dog named Rusty
who fixed a broke boy.
Poetry is the giant full moon
over the ocean at midnight.
Poetry is tears and laughter
and ******* and endings.

I think I understand our subtle hatred
  for each the other. How long can we live
  in each other's shadow before you disappear?
  I had your children bloated while you took
  a lover. I ached for suicide but went nuthouse.
  Shrinks and pills and shocks convinced me to
  put my head in our gas oven and let it go.
  I always thought of our children 'til the end.

I'm not crafty like a fox.
I'm just an idiotic drunk
surfing on a buzz of my
own creation. I have a
clever thought or two.
My chaotic life is gentle
at happy hour. I ignore
dripping faucets and
past due bills and time
chasing me to my eulogy.

1940 Pittsburgh, PA

  Spent men went to bars then.
  They were iron workers from
  hell's furnaces with parched
  thirst needing beer and fun.

  They cursed bosses and dealt
  cards and forgot the pain.
  They went home drunk with
  midnight's bar songs again.

  Sleeping kids and skeptic wife
  greeted him in angry silence.
  Up at dawn for another shift
  and a beer to face the violence.

I make the laws of nature after all.
What lives among my vast reaches is
looking at clear night skies in awe
wondering at their reason for living
and the cruelty to die never knowing.
They created myths of God and Heaven
and a place to punish unkind acts
owned by Devil and called it Hell.
We are endless infinities' mirrors
rain falling forever with my tears.

You weren't seen
in my blind spot
too old so young
perfect ink blot
no trouble at all
self absorbed dad
in and out of lust
edge of mind mad.
you were a rock
in my slaughter
never faltered
first Daughter.

Quit trying to
make me happy
just let me be
in my misery
drunk honesty.

I'm living
in a holding
pattern waiting
to be cleared
for my burial.

Two lovers court you
give you sweets and all
the lust you would want
peg, hole or blow up doll.

I embrace your sorrow.
I recognize it as my own.
I know your sunken cheeks
of hunger as I know mine.
I think poor and I think
humble but proud, fierce
not looking for a fight
but demanding respect.

Women solder circuit boards for hours while
   a man tests their work with his instrument.
   King of the line. He struts like a rooster
   and has his pick among this house of hens.

   He bathes in cologne and goes commando to
   be ready at the drop of a hat for anything.
   He drives a van with a mattress in the back.
   He rocks it at lunch hour which is his limit.

   He thrives in this small world of desperate
   angels giving love but never knowing him.
   He kisses the girls then makes them cry.
   Love is fire until a factory whistle blows.

December 1, 2017

        From midnight to one
        her life came undone,
        the world's fabric torn
        as a ghost became born.

        She haunts across our street
        noises made with dragging feet;
        trembling voice says with a whisper,
        "Beware the coming of the Reaper".

I brought you to life
   in a poem. You'll never
   love in moderation. Love
   screams out loud and catches
   its breath and sleeps 'til noon.
   Then it happens next full moon.

Bury my heart
at Wounded Knee
I played my part
now set me free.

You are finally facing
my demons left behind.
I am now facing yours
to whom I've been blind.

You drank too much sorrow
choke in sleep by tomorrow
overnight we had a fight
you took your final flight.

Please just make
Hello Poetry
kid friendly.
Better for you
and for me.
The heck with
Chuck Bukowski,
Ginsberg's Howl.

Poets can't keep secrets. We're poets.
     We must express emotion no matter
     truth or consequence. We spill tears.
     We pen silent trembles in spatters
     scratch blame upon the pages like
     ancient scribes with prayers to rain
     upon unwashed masses and baptize
     you into the church of gracious pain.

Nothing's perfect but some
     things are perfect enough.
     Begging God in tears to cure
     your cancer for the kid's sake
     as you puke your guts out in
     the chemo spa treatment room.
     Remission means temporary
     reprieve between the scans.

I was married and then not. ****.
  Vows don't demand beheading anymore.
  We earnestly married in farce.
  We drowned in my guilt and moved on.
  I was in wilderness for 40 days and nights.
  You called crying when Pepper got hit by a car
  and died. I came to your dorm room and we
  drank beers and got naked and ****** away
  our naivete. I never saw you again.
  I went to Boston for my next chapter.

I wrote you a poem
  saying I was alone
  imagine us holding
  hands walking along
  cobble stone streets
  look in shop windows
  ready for Christmas
  I buy your sweet time.

Our hearts are low hanging fruit
for you ******* Casanovas.
We're forgotten as soon as you ***.
We curse you when you never call.

When my brain implodes,
my Irish heart explodes
the entire Earth erodes
I was here for a breath
my birth to my death
a tiny piece of flesh.

I'd never end my life on purpose.
   I couldn't pull my own trigger or
   swallow my hand full of pills or
   jump from egotistical heights to
   look like a broken doll discarded.

   I daydream of situations where I
   have tests and see my doctor who
   delivers bad news, the worst news.
   I'm stoic. I refuse chemo. I'm done.
   I'll die in a morphine haze happy.

   When is old too old? My days are
   reruns of reruns. I won't find the
   love of my life. I won't break hearts
   or have mine broken. I've lived the
   Kama Sutra with a sore back for it.

   Maybe the snake hair girl will
   look deep into my soul and see a
   piece worth stealing and hold me
   in her bed and whisper as I look
   into her eyes and turn to stone.

Chemistry and Biology. Bang!Bang!
We call it Love! It's really Lust!
Pregnant you glow until you grow.
Be my Valentine 'til Death or Dust.

Taken with Cindy Issack from work.
Marriage counseling. Friend events
week nights confused unused a ****.
I'm passed off to a shrink for bents.

He sees me in a panic and then ******.
Non addictive friend for 15 numb years
guilt controlled by my shield from sin.
We had carte blanche **** without fears.

I believe my country has died.
Defeated Lady Liberty on her knees
with a Scimitar for her beheading.
Communists crawling into her guts
for the final feeding as we all hold
impotent guns without bullets.

When you stole my heart I was dancing.
  I was clumsy on my knees romancing.
  When I kissed splendid siren *******
  We slept and we ****** slow as beasts
  in morning and you wept. I wonder why
  the mirage gets closer **** it will die.

You poets. You priests. You shrinks.
You've no idea what I'm going through.
My shredded nerves demand another hit.
Have my body for another shot of it.
Let me dream among mine own kind.
Tomorrow I'll wake in ****** hell.
I'll find another shot into paradise.
I'll dream of being clean once again.
I'll dream of perfect childhoods and
true love that lasts a lifetime.

Just a clever weaver of words,
not a poet really just pretend.
I smoke and drink like geniuses
and chase my fame to its end.

I live in the dark
no sun no park
I feel my way
sun warm today
white cane taps
a stranger claps
I fall in love
his heart above
his light shines
in my eyes blind.

I let you brand me
as I branded you.
We drove off in a
loud tail of cans
to our honeymoon
high hopes and
asleep before ***.
Never had a chance.

Stalling is my only move.
We'll really live tomorrow.
One more chance to prove
one more chance to borrow.
Promise to pay my bar tab
with an IOU of pure sorrow.

It was just another
  womb to betray
  just one more day
  just another mother
  9 long months sober
  last day of October
  in the witch's brew
  it's coming true
  Rosemary's baby due.
  devil's lover knew.

I'm tap dancing as fast as I can the
    sparks jumping off the sidewalk like
    demon flares half insane in the dark!
    I'd bend over backwards to please you.

    I don't know what rule I've broken but
    I'm sorry. Your brutal silence breaks
    my back. I'm stillborn in a quiet place.
    My dead dreams are angry and screaming.

I barely live
day to day
hard to give
flesh to pay.

I'm aching naked
  in the raw dawn
  of our kitchen
  I found my new soulmate
  I'm leaving you and the kids
  to write poetry with poets.

  I'm aching naked
  in the raw dawn
  of your dorm room
  our last kiss and
  I'm off to Boston
  where I hope I am.

  I'm aching naked
  in the raw dawn
  of my garret
  a broken fist I put in your wall
  I'm jealousy's beast of burden
I'll call drunk from the booth
outside the Taco Bell
and slur my apology
to answering  machines.

  I'm aching naked
  in the raw dawn
  with a drunk monument.
  I'm just another voice
  gather your stuff, bye
  why do I keep dying inside?

  I'm aching naked
  in the raw dawn
  Nashville new job, we're over
  I'll mail your stuff.
  you were the cruelest month
  still I couldn't set you free

  I'm aching naked
  in the raw dawn
  always
  no cure for romantics
  who believe in God
  and impossible love.

I wear his flannel shirt and see his
old hands how can I be free? Let me
live my broken life the best way I can.
You were a war hero but I'm just a kid
who adored you and fell short of the mark.
Give me a mission. I'll fly and die for you.

I remember your touch I hunger for
like the night we became us on the
back stairs as the party faded away
into white noise and my heart beat
into yours and I knew my world just
fell to pieces and broken promises
and broken children were coming.
I relive it one second at a time.
I still look for you everywhere
trying to find the back stairs.

Bewildering array of possibility
  you were born you and me born me
  God died in the Time's Headlines
  life is accidents of French Mimes.

I always saw you on my horizon.
I drank to your health and to ours.
I went to meetings and confessed
weakness and drank bland coffee
and ate stale donuts and smoked
an endless chain of cigarettes.

In my cups we danced in the neon.
On bar stools and raucous laughter
with my dreams hiding in liquor's
ugly fog I gave you life and baptism.
Can I ever know normal? I'll be home
last call when I reach my rope's end.