last time we tried to change the world too fast to try to change the world too fast we tried to change the world too fast last time we tried to change the world too fast to change the world this time the change we try will last

I don’t believe in brothers
And I don’t believe in the brotherhood of man
And I don’t know much about anything
but i know i need a smooth operator
I wish I was a normal guy

that kava had me feeling pretty
And I think I let you in.
It was smart, it was sweet
I try to say goodbye,
And you sweep me off my feet
I try to play it cool
But I crave your lovin on me

It’s centrifugal motion
But your still on my lonely mind
It’s that pivotal moment
And I dream about you all the time

When you Take it on back
And turn on the red light
it’s like a thousand Julys

——————————/———————————

I don’t wish,
I don’t want to wish,
Wishing only wounds the heart.
I’m tired of being played like a violin
Always betting and loosing on love
But When I get, what I really really want, I need ****** healing.

Even when I dream of you,
I try to fly and fall.
The sweetest dream will never do,
Without my wings I feel so small.
I guess I need you baby

And I don’t wanna miss a thing
This kiss this kiss
You’ll be with me in my dreams
This kiss this kiss
tonight it’s you and me

Even when i dream of you
its centrifugal motion
without my wings i feel so small
and i dream about you all the time

man must learn to aim
the stream that comes from within
so he is not soiled

Two guys drowned in my backyard... a month and a half ago. At first I thought I would process it spiritually, and I tried:

sitting shiva on the dock
reading tim leary’s book of the dead
writing poetry while they were in the bardo

But their death has become a social metaphor.
A transitional event, transitional like:

covid
the recession
and 9/11

                        They are Boys Forever

Even though they were both men, and brothers aged 26 and 30, they are frozen forever, anywhere before their death. they are the 90s and 2000s, and most importantly the 2010s, but definitely not the 20s.

So, I swirl my callused toes around in the water’s particles wondering what pieces of them may be left behind from before they fished the bodies out. I wonder, what those pieces saw, what secrets those pieces saw, when, if ever those pieces were loved.

People extrapolate theories as to how a day of causal boating could result in the senseless death of two brothers, letting their phobia’s and traumas project upon the event ie;

“they were doped up”
“they were fighting”
“they were drunk”

Why can’t we just let them be mythic?

can my hamster get corona?

chloroquine

chloroquine hoax

when will we shake hands again?

things to eat so i don’t get corona

think my way into not getting sick

my heroes are dead and my enemies in power

think my way into health

think my way into living a better life

get better at doing the thing

think my way into change

how fast are humans supposed to change?

you’ll find it on the back streets

on hot and humid nights.

you’ll smell the night is tinged

with something sacrine bleeding

melancholic.

remembering nights when me and my guy
would be altered and get nostalgic;

remembering times when decaying crusts of summers browning bronzed you;

ask me how the back end of his thigh tastes...

fluorescent?

what about the inside of his neckline...

phosphorescent?

full gut but somehow craving,

so sweet but somehow rotting,

in the halogen lights,

what is this smell?

     : magnolia

drag the winter on
oh how i long
for an end to this winter.

the healing that comes
with the sunshine of may
the bounty we gather
                      
around the hearth,
the lovers we remember
with the thawing of earth.


                  who would have thought
                   last summer would end?

Inviting it to become stronger
like a drug taking over you
continue to sink in
It doesn’t need to change
the fact you’re loosing time
the wide road before you
try not to fight it
try just to sink into it

Ms. Del Rey says “the world is made for two”,
but her idea of two is some fresh hell;
it’s seems that Lana thinks a girl’s abuse,
is cinematic fodder one can sell.
The other woman sings about her man.
“sO pOPuLIiSt” with flowers on her head.
While some may come from poor & tell the tale,
Del Rey wears being poor like it’s a dress. 
But voices that she channels in her songs,
Bespeak a femme fatale alone, and they,  
Are both no one, and everyone in one.
The guardians of endless summer days.

Said yes but you meant no
Last time I was on these roads
I was chasing money
I was running for the paper
Now the money chases me
I run from the winter

When walking on the cobbled sweating streets,
Through center town, I stop to have a drink.
Begrimmed the fog in valley sets to speak,
To visions of the “whats already seen”.

Like one who acts like god is here to give,
The mucid trace of once experienced:
Begets my physic, like a *****, and hence.
The lighting call of music down the lane.

The frisk and gambol sure‘d is my measure;
That I should keep on dancing like a child,
With youth by candle light and flushed with mead...
Not drowning now but flying promenade.

By the labyrinth of what’s Implied in thee,
I’m running through the halls of jubilee.
With longing to the forests edge I creep...
Imbibe upon the sweet lycanthropy.