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60 · Mar 2022
Waiting
Shamai Mar 2022
I’m waiting for the sun to shine
I’m waiting for the day
I sit inside and wait
Hope the sun will surely stay
Seems to always be
Waiting for something to come
I’m waiting in the morning
And when the day is done
I wait for things to rise
And the oven to get hot
I wait for rain to stop
And wait for water in the ***
My day is spent in waiting
For something to come out right
I’m spending my time waiting
From the morning to the night
If I could only go on
With the things I’m waiting for
If I could just be all myself
From toes up to my core
If I could stay for just some time
In the space that we call present
Then I could understand
And see where my time is spent
Let go of expectations
Let go of judgment too
Just do things in the present
Give myself the love I’m due
Then anxiety will fly out the door
And peace will reign inside
And I can love now all of me
And stand with strength and pride
No longer living in past and future
The present is where I’ll be
With joy and jubilation
With love hope and with glee
60 · Oct 2018
LOVE
Shamai Oct 2018
A time and space where the angels dwell
And guide us into a place of non-attainment
We look at the stars, and count their beauty
In their light
And, we wonder how we ever allowed their beauty
To reach beyond our touch

And, isn’t love like those stars that we cannot reach?
We try so hard to understand with our minds and bodies
Truly forgetting that we are created in love, exist in love, and are
Total love

We focus on attachment to body and mind
And forget the soul of antiquity
That houses the God
Of our creation

Love is but a bubble of existence
That reaches out to hold and protect us
As in the Mother’s womb
Where we can truly be
Who we are meant to

Love is that catch phrase
That tells us that we are someone
And belong
To another being of existence
If not..to ourselves

The truth is..that we are not
If we have not another
And we can search outside from here to eternity
And only find that true love
Within ourselves

Love…magic…wholeness of existence
Within and without
From beginning to end
And we are
One.
59 · Mar 2022
Prayer
Shamai Mar 2022
I pray to God for loving
And I pray to God for food
My every wish I wish for
Becomes prayer and that is good
Prayer is just a wishing game
A time to ask for stuff
Yet isn’t it time to realize
That what I have is quite enough
When I pray to God I recognize
His presence and his Grace
When I pray to God I hope
That I don’t fall flat on my face
Prayer is communication
And what I could be saying is ‘thanks’
Thanks for all you give me
And thanks for all your yanks
That bring me back to where I am
And where I hope to be
Thank you for your loving
And thanks for holding me
59 · Oct 2018
Questions?
Shamai Oct 2018
Is today a poetry day?
Or a day of prose?
Will my words be long?
Or short?
And how will I express
My wisdom
And learned thoughts?
Or maybe
I should
Try
A day of
Silence
59 · Oct 2018
Yawn
Shamai Oct 2018
My eyes are getting heavy
Perhaps I should go to sleep
The baby is already down
And hasn’t made a peep

I walk towards my comfy bed
Hoping for dream land soon
The sun has set, it’s getting dark
And soon I’ll see the moon

I’ve put away the toys and clothes
I’ve tried to make things neat
There’s nothing left upon the floor
And nothing on the seat

Another day has come and gone
With so much to get done
And now I lay me down to sleep
Until the rising sun
59 · Mar 2019
Poetry
Shamai Mar 2019
How do you write them
I just don’t know
The words come on forward
And soon there’s a show
My poetry seems to write itself
I don’t give it much thought
The words flow so freely
And they come out a lot
So I found this here website
Where I can just write
And share all my thoughts
In clear spirit and sight
58 · Nov 2018
On the Wind
Shamai Nov 2018
What is death
But a time for repose
An in between moment
In our journey of life
Taking us by the hand
Leading us to our future
Our destiny of sorts
If we can just let go
Of our attachments
Our need to own
To have power
To be human
Death takes us through a doorway
Where thoughts become more potent
And bodies not as important
Emotions are thwarted for deeds
And discernment
Slowly
We become
More
And our bodies
Turn to ash
And we
Blow
On
The
Wind
58 · Oct 2018
Gratitude
Shamai Oct 2018
Is the silence of knowing
That we are not alone
In this desolation
Of unconsciousness

A waving motion
Of understanding
That in our alone-ness
We still belong
To the many that walked
Before us

It is a remembering
That hand in hand is needed
In order to complete
Our life’s work
And that
We were never intended to walk
Totally alone

Oh, great creator of life
Forever guide us forward
Bringing together that which was
With that which is to be
And remind us again and again
To check into our hearts
In order to know
That all is, as it is meant to be
In gratitude.
58 · Feb 2019
Today
Shamai Feb 2019
Today
I want to give back to God
The gifts of love
Honesty
And respect
I want to be
That person
That God
Expects me to be
I want to hold
In highest esteem
That part of myself
That is
God like
And to know
That I have been made in perfection
And to live
Truth
58 · Mar 2019
What if?
Shamai Mar 2019
What if what we call dreaming
Is actually our true home?

What if our lives are just a giant video game
Played by people with a weird sense of humour?

What if we really don’t exist
Except in someone’s warped sense of justice?

What if Truth
Is just someone’s mind creation?

What if when we sleep
We are really living in another dimension?

What if what we call justice
Is really injustice to someone else?

What if what we think is proper
Is really improper?

What if we can’t know right from wrong
And it just gets skewered up in our fantasy?

What if life as we live it
Truly takes us nowhere?

and all along, we thought
that there was a right and wrong way to live
and that our lives depended on how we behave
and treating people with kindness was important
and that compassion played a role in who we are
and that we all have a purpose in life

What if there is no purpose
And, we are just here….now…..
58 · Jun 2020
Dissociative Fugue
Shamai Jun 2020
Living a life
Of not feeling
And having problems
Attaching to life
And those around me
All that abuse
That kept me
From being myself
And now
Sometimes
I float
Have trouble keeping
My feet on the ground
So many years
So much time
So far away from the abuse
And yet
I’m still
In it
58 · Dec 2020
What?
Shamai Dec 2020
What is it called
When you don’t even
Have the strength
To yell
At your dog
To stop
Barking
57 · Dec 2019
LOVE
Shamai Dec 2019
What is love
If not a perpetual
Joy of be ing
Our hearts sing and our bodies glow
And we believe
Yes, truly believe
That there is more to us
Than our bodies, minds, or emotions
Human love can be a tingle
And Spiritual Love
Can be our lives
57 · Jan 2022
LOVE
Shamai Jan 2022
There’s a feeling inside of me
That I call love
It’s warm and it’s cuddly
And a gift from above
Love is a word
That is hard to describe
A feeling a knowing
It comes from inside
When a person’s in love
They radiate Grace
They’re glowing they’re happy
It shows on their face
The day can be rainy
Or blustery cold
But when love is around
It is beauty to behold
This four letter word
Can express just so much
A warm compassionate voice
And a gentle touch
They say love is just
In the eye of the beholder
But when love is around
People don’t grow older
For love is the panacea
For everlasting Grace
For when love is around
It brightens up the place
57 · Mar 2022
Blemishes and Beauty
Shamai Mar 2022
We drove on the street
And every time
I made a mistake
You pointed it out
And when we shopped
You made sure
To tell me
When I was wrong
And in the house
You pointed out
What
I needed to do
Please remember
None of us are perfect
And we each carry with us
The things
We need
To work on
Imagine for a moment
A world
Where people
Point out our beauty
Instead of
Our
Blemishes
56 · Dec 2020
Silent?
Shamai Dec 2020
Sometimes
I have only poetry
To express my thoughts
And my experiences
My hopes and my dreams
Get expressed
Through poems
What would I do
If there were no poems
Or poetry
With which
To express
All
Would
Be
Silent
56 · Dec 2019
GRATITUDE
Shamai Dec 2019
Gratitude
Is at the essence
Of our be ing
When we can appreciate
And love who we are
And all that we have
And bring harmony and joy
Into our lives
Then we can know the true meaning of
Gratitude
56 · Jun 2019
Life
Shamai Jun 2019
Life’s twists and turns
Are a journey
Of no return
No matter how we long
We can’t go backwards
Or force the future
To come forward
So
We live in the present
While
Holding on
To all that was
And all that is to be
55 · Oct 2018
Spring
Shamai Oct 2018
I awoke this morning with a thought of Spring
How, just like the crocuses push through the snow
And show their tiny heads before opening
So we are like that Spring
Opening when our time is ready
Taking our time rising
From the unconscious to the conscious
Knowing of who we are
And how we will project ourselves
Into the newness of our world

How kindly we are
To allow the process
Neither rushing nor holding back
On our evolution
Into newness

Spring, the harbinger of
Our truth
Our selves
55 · Dec 2019
Hello Poetry
Shamai Dec 2019
I came to read your poetry
And look what I have found
A broken heart
A floating leaf
And snow upon the ground
You write as if your life is over
Or maybe just begun
You write as if you fall in love
And have no room to run
I read your words
And feel your pain
And comment on them some
I send out hearts
And small congrats
And love that you have come
To join me on this quest of life
For writing is our game
We look inside
Our deepest heart
And try to feel the pain
It’s hard to come upon a group
Where pain of love is welcome
And here I sit with pen in hand
And read all you have gained
I have to write, not just to read
I’m coming to an end
With pen in hand and paper still
Some poetry to gain
55 · Oct 2018
Words
Shamai Oct 2018
I never quite know
What to write in a poem
I look into my heart
And search words
To find meaning
To life's distractions
Never quite knowing
What I will find
When
I’m finished
55 · May 2020
Nothing
Shamai May 2020
It’s over
They took me away
Ever to be never
Longing to return
To the pain
Pain is better
Than
Nothing
54 · Nov 2018
Our Stories
Shamai Nov 2018
Our life
Is about stories
The ones we make
As we are living
Our lives

The stories that take us
From childhood
To maturity
And back
Into childhood

The stories that define
Who we are
And who we think
We should be

Our stories
Our lives
Our downfall
Because
We believe them
54 · Nov 2018
Somtimes
Shamai Nov 2018
Sometimes
Life just feels like
Too much
Like people everywhere
Aren’t conscious
Of Truth
And they hurry, scurry around
Without making any sense
Of life
Don’t people want to know
What life is all about
Or is it better that they live
In total chaos
Moving moment by moment
Without thought
Without conscience
Without knowing
Why
53 · Nov 2018
Love
Shamai Nov 2018
A time and space where the angels dwell
And guide us into a place of non-attainment
We look at the stars, and count their beauty
In their light
And, we wonder how we ever allowed their beauty
To reach beyond our touch

And, isn’t love like those stars that we cannot reach?
We try so hard to understand with our minds and bodies
Truly forgetting that we are created in love, exist in love, and are
Total love

We focus on attachment to body and mind
And forget the soul of antiquity
That houses the God
Of our creation

Love is but a bubble of existence
That reaches out to hold and protect us
As in the Mother’s womb
Where we can truly be
Who we are meant to

Love is that catch phrase
That tells us that we are someone
And belong
To another being of existence
If not..to ourselves

The truth is..that we are not
If we have not another
And we can search outside from here to eternity
And only find that true love
Within ourselves

Love…magic…wholeness of existence
Within and without
From beginning to end
And we are
One.
53 · Nov 2020
Fantasy
Shamai Nov 2020
Is there wonder
In a world
Of darkness and woe
Is there a place
Inside of us
That gives us a chance
To collect our
Happiness and joy
Is there a reason
Or rhyme to life
As we know it
Or is it
Just
Some kind of
Fantasy
53 · Oct 2018
OH NO!
Shamai Oct 2018
The chocolate is calling
I’ve covered up my ears
I feel the salivation
And I try to call my peers

I know I should  not want it
And to eat it would be dumb
But it calls to me from the other room
Beckoning, calling me to come

I try to eat a carrot
I try to eat a pear
It doesn’t quench my cravings
And my longing is still there

Sweet, juicy, dribbling down my chin
Maybe celery will do it
I lick my lips, anticipating
Maybe just a little bit

A corner, maybe a quarter
Of the bar is not so bad
Ok, just a small bite more
Half the bar I have now had

Before I know it, I am done
There is nothing left to eat
There is nothing in this world
That chocolate can not beat

So now I sit with guilt in tow
Wondering how to stop the call
Loving chocolate is not so bad
Think I’ll get some at the mall
53 · Dec 2020
Sleep
Shamai Dec 2020
Sleep eludes me
I toss and turn
And close my eyes
And still
Sleep
Doesn’t come
I throw away
The pain of yesterday
And calm the nerves
That prepare me
For tomorrow
And still
Sleep
Doesn’t come
And
I lay
Awake
Thinking
Of
Sleep
53 · Feb 2022
what's in a name
Shamai Feb 2022
We have a name
That tells us all
That we are meant to be
And yet that name is given
By the ones that we can’t see
We take the name
And make it ours
We hold onto it tight
We think that we are all of that
We think that this is right
And if we were to question
What that name now means to us
We might find that we'd query
And put up a little fuss
Imagine if that name we hold
Could be a choice of ours
What would you call yourself
Would you reach out for the stars
Or keep the one that’s given you
Hoping you grow inside
Do you live your life by others choice
Do you go along for the ride
If you could choose another name what do you think it be
Would it stay the same or take a change
Rename yourself with glee
If I could make a little change
I’d think on what to do
For changing out our proper name
Our self we would renew
Shamai Nov 2018
The world is an empty void
Of meaningless objects
And paraphernalia that
Have no substance
Those in power
Try to get us interested
In gobbledy ****
Meaningless jargon
And things
That are dangerous to our health
They make us believe
That they care
About our health
And about our families
And about the world
And all they care about
Is power
And *******
And the extinction
Of
Love
52 · Oct 2018
Too Real
Shamai Oct 2018
Is it true?
Can it be real?
Do I really want to know?
Perhaps….not
52 · Nov 2018
Pineapple Treat
Shamai Nov 2018
Juice dripping down my face
Sweetness in my mouth
Who could have known the delicacy
Of the flesh
Knife cutting through skin
Waste in bag
Eager anticipation
Yum
52 · Nov 2020
How do I go on
Shamai Nov 2020
I don’t know
How to go on
I’m stuck
In this place
That felt
So good
And
So
Whole
And now

I’m stuck
And
I don’t know
How
To go
On
52 · Dec 2020
Silence
Shamai Dec 2020
How ridiculous this is
I mean who cares
And why worry
And what does it matter
Crazy thoughts
Race through my head
Non stop accusations and reminders
To be better
Running without stop
And
I put up my stop sign
And I close down the game
And
I enter
Into
The silence
Ahhhhh
52 · Oct 2018
Friendship
Shamai Oct 2018
I had a friend
That was dear to me
And I lost her
And miss her
Friendship

I had a friend
And she helped me
And guided me
And showed me love
And I lost her

I had a friend
And I looked for her
Over hill and dale
And back again
And I lost her

And then
In a corner of the world
Where they write poetry
I found her again
And
I send her Love
51 · Oct 2024
War
Shamai Oct 2024
War
The bombs are explosions in the air
With fragments falling into fields of clover
And the Shield helps us to breathe
In a time when life has become so fragile
And I wait for the boom sounds to eliminate
Whoever or whatever the enemy is
And my belly flattens as I wait for the sounds to dissipate
Anticipating the siren
That causes us to run for shelter
In a time when life exists
Why has hatred and anger taken over our sensibilities
And what is it that keeps us going
In times when the going gets rough
How will we exist in a world of confusion
And chaos and unreality
When grounding means fear
And love is kept hidden in the heart
How far can we move from our humanity
And
When will it all end
51 · Jun 2020
Silence
Shamai Jun 2020
Silence
Can be so beautiful
Especially
When it comes
After a long time
Of
Thoughts
51 · Nov 2020
I haven't been afraid
Shamai Nov 2020
I haven’t been afraid
Of living my life
And taking in
All that
Life throws at me
With a smile
I haven’t been afraid of doing
What I’m meant to do
Even if the task is hard
And I wonder
Where I’ll
Get the strength
I haven’t been afraid
To be
All that
I’m meant to be
In this moment
And
It makes me happy
To know
That I can
51 · Nov 2018
Life Questions
Shamai Nov 2018
I am not
And have never been
A stranger
To my love
And anxiety
I know
And yet the unknowing
Plagues me
And makes me question
Who I am
And what I have come here
To do
And so
I vacillate
And contemplate
And ruminate
And laugh at myself
For taking life
So seriously
51 · Oct 2018
No Poem Today
Shamai Oct 2018
Today I cannot write a poem
The words they just won’t come
I’m eager to post on the board
And I’m feeling really dumb

If words don’t flow, then a poet I ain’t
Trying hard to find some words
That flow in line and keep a beat
But mine just sound like turds

So maybe I should stay away
From poetry and  prose
And keep my thoughts just deep inside
And let them take a doze

See what I mean, I just can’t write
A poem worthy of beans
I think I’ll hide and stay inside
I’ll hide by any means

A poet I’m not, as you can see
My words are kind of jumpy
I’ll just look out the window today
And just allow feelings of grumpy
50 · May 2020
Today
Shamai May 2020
Today
I will stay on track
I will do all that I promised I will do
I will continue to grow, and learn, and be
I will enjoy life and live it
Today I will know that, if this is my last day
I have lived it
To its fullest
50 · May 2020
What is life?
Shamai May 2020
Something is happening
A shift
In my understanding
Of where I am
And where
I need to be
A change
In my placement in the world
And my bodies willingness
To accept
Change
I let go of so much
And empty myself
Of past inforgiveness
I thought I had to
And now I know
It was just my mind
Guiding me
In the wrong direction
And today
I don’t know who I am
Or where I’m going
And I have hope
That
Someone does
50 · Dec 2018
You're Human
Shamai Dec 2018
Have you ever played a game
That hooked you in
And took you away
From life’s living
And
Have you ever
Listened to a boring talk
Thinking you owed it to your friend
To be faithful
And
Have you ever done something you wished you hadn’t
And thought you had
No choice

Well, guess what

You’re human
50 · Dec 2020
Hungering
Shamai Dec 2020
The longing deepens
And the craving
Begins
The gut wrenching feeling
Of needing someone so badly
That nothing else matters
And all my resolve
Goes
Down
The
drain
50 · Nov 2018
The Phone
Shamai Nov 2018
I sit and wait for the phone to ring
For an email to appear
For someone to show
That they care
To remind me
That I am still alive
And still play a role
In this life
A purpose
A reason for being
Why doesn’t the phone ring?
50 · Jun 2020
The Merry go round
Shamai Jun 2020
Around and around the thoughts go
With no beginning and no end
‘round and ‘round in my mind
Like a merry go round
Of life
And
It’s hard
To still
50 · Mar 2019
Poetry 2
Shamai Mar 2019
Sometimes it’s just fun
To let the thoughts flow
And type them up quickly
And watch my thoughts grow
Poetry is a fun way
To learn and to teach
Putting thought words together
From a comfortable niche
49 · Aug 2020
LOVE
Shamai Aug 2020
Held
In the arms
Of love
Never to return
To
Normalcy
Again
49 · Jul 2020
I Love It
Shamai Jul 2020
You came in as a surprise
I wasn’t looking
And you found me
Hiding in the dust
Wondering about life
And you took me in
And you ate all of me
Until
We became one
And
I love it
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