Sometimes I sit around
Thinking about what life could have been
If I had…
You can fill in the blanks
And I wonder
How different things
Could have been
If I had only
Just said no
Or yes
Or maybe
Or not spoken at all
Could I really have changed my destiny?
Or  was it already
Set in stone
Before I was born
How much free choice
Do we really have?

Being in the world
Is not always as easy as it looks
It takes
Fortification
And courage
And a strength
Seldom found
In the Animal Kingdom
For animals
Never have to worry
About being overtaken
By someone’s mind
Or being taken advantage of
With cruelty
Animals ****
For food
And dominance
And nothing else
While the animal that is man
Kills
For the sheer pleasure of it

This is
Just the way
It is
And I truly
Have no say
In
The outcome

I always thought
That life was real
And now I realize
That we’re all just playing a game
Of Hide and Seek

When will I learn
To just play the game
And not get involved
In the outcome?
Or, am I supposed to feel
And connect, and become a part of
The evolution
Of
Corruption

Money
A commodity
Written on paper
With coloured ink
And worth
Nothing

Why do we believe
Everything people tell us?
Why can’t we learn
To think on our own
And not be ruled
By the Laws of the Land?

I can think
And feel
And be
On my own
And yet
I need other
To confirm
Me

The world is corrupt
And the people in it
Even more vile
And yet
This is my home
For now

Will I learn
To be like others?
Or will I retain
My Self Awareness
And be Truthful
To my Self.

It’s been awhile since I wrote words
And thoughts upon the page like turds
Of nasty memories of things abide
From which I lived, and could have died

First body reminds us of the pain
Of which we no longer want to go to again
And then emotions from eyes do flow
Upon black wings of an eager crow
We yell and scream to get it out
These are authentic, not just a pout
And to a paper we run to scratch
Expressions, emotives, put on a  patch
And deeper in we try to go
And many times the road is slow
But travel we do on our journey home
Many steps forward on which to roam

When all is said and done and gone
We come back better, it’s not a con
For consciousness comes and mind is stilled
And peace and calm on which we build
A new understanding of life on which
We can live in the now and found a nitch

Life is lived in pain and sorrow
And joy and laughter in which we borrow
To rise again to new heights of Grace
Our authentic self to live and face

There is a vacancy in my heart
That calls to be filled
By someone who knows
Life’s meaning