the body keeps score
resurrecting at night
re-living early in the morning
when it’s dark and you’re lonely
fragile most vulnerable
waking up crying
remembering replaying
traumas past and present

i float among the stars
slowly spinning
touching nothing
feeling something
it’s crystal clear
not black or white
but somewhere
in between
lost in time
surrounded by sound
it all stops
the silence is deafening

it’s unbearable
numbing and crushing
destroying
my will
to live
this darkness
surrounded by loneliness

the slow swirl
of a cloud
in a endless sky
wandering
among the stars
as the moon dims
a dream fades
remembered briefly
at sunrise
i wake up crying
for a life
i've ever lived

you realize
you’re aging
getting old
closer to dying
with every sunrise

fear takes hold
creeping into your mind
consuming your thoughts
i am no longer young
spry or vibrant

i feel helpless
hopeless
how long do i have
before the sun’s final set

you will die
be forgotten
only your poems
and writings
maybe remembered

you ache
for the touch
of a man
desperate
afraid
of growing old
dying alone