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3h · 16
wrung out
i’ve stopped caring
unplugged
from the news
facebook
& social media

i need to protect myself
my health
mental
emotional
as a parent does
for a child

i am powerless
feel helpless
a paper tiger
i can only offer
empty prayers

i am overwhelmed
wrung out
from theses
never ending
crises

i am suffering
from compassion fatigue
i no longer give a ****
about starving kids
or drowned refugees

i am afraid
of relapsing
falling back
into addiction

i need a brake
an escape
from the everyday
stresses
Apr 15 · 89
ancient poets
ghost queen Apr 15
it's all been said
been written
expressed
how many ways

why bother
to write
re-hash
the obvious  

what can you say
that those before
haven’t

how many ways
can you whisper
your agonies
Apr 10 · 148
terrified
ghost queen Apr 10
i lie
to myself
and others
when i say
I am not afraid
to die

it terrifies me
the idea
of ceasing
to exist
Apr 8 · 152
regrets
ghost queen Apr 8
when you look down
at the body
of your mother
lying in a coffin
as the lid is closed
lowered in the ground
and covered by dirt
there is nothing else to say
but shed tears
of regret
Apr 8 · 56
dying
ghost queen Apr 8
it’s time

let go

accept

the inevitable

fall

willing

into the void

the blackness

the nothingness

of nonexistence
Two funerals in one month Mama Liz & Papa George
Mar 15 · 341
heart & soul
ghost queen Mar 15
the world
melts away
when I hold you
in my arms

there are no others
nothing else matters
you are the center
of my universe

i see God
in your eyes
feel bliss
in your kisses
serenity
in your presences

It is you
it is me
it is us
together
as one
heart
and soul
For Teresa
Feb 13 · 343
foresee
ghost queen Feb 13
it is overwhelming
to think about
the monumental
monolithic
cataclysmic
changes
that are
under way

i have let go
of the things
i can not change
freeing
releasing
my fears
and anxieties away

serenity
has washed over me
enveloped me
in a glow
of bliss
and forgiveness

i am at peace
with what i foresee
Foresee (verb): be aware of beforehand; predict.
Feb 10 · 258
sorrow
ghost queen Feb 10
how can i not, but feel sorrow
look ahead, into the future
do you see
the devastation, desolation, that awaits
helpless, frustrated, i’ve resigned myself
to my and the world’s fate
Sorrow (noun): a feeling of deep distress caused by loss, disappointment, or other misfortune suffered by oneself or others. Sorrow "is more 'intense' than sadness... it implies a long-term state". At the same time "sorrow — but not unhappiness — suggests a degree of resignation…
Jan 25 · 109
unforgiving brutality
ghost queen Jan 25
are you seeking
meaning
in the stark
unforgiving brutality
of the human
condition

overwhelmed
by the emptiness

solace
found only
in addiction

numbing
away the pain

if only for
a moment

what is it
do you seek
from this existence
Jan 25 · 80
diary character
ghost queen Jan 25
am i
important
to you
or am I
an extra
a diary character
a footnote
in your life
Jan 21 · 317
loved & lost
ghost queen Jan 21
i thought
I won’t feel it
but i did
getting dumped
hurts
was it worth it
letting you in
loving you
is it true
what they say
it is better to have loved and lost
than never to have loved at all
and
time heals all wounds
Jan 21 · 62
demons
ghost queen Jan 21
run
fast
and far away
hide
and hope
the demons
don’t find
and crucify your ***
ghost queen Jan 19
i need
a safe space
a sanctuary
to shelter
stay in place
watch the madness
from afar
exploding
outside
my window
retreat
to the bedroom
when life
is cruel
Jan 14 · 49
melancholy
ghost queen Jan 14
feel it
deep in your bones
don’t turn
or run away
accept
surrender
savor it
the pain
despair
of melancholy
Dec 2021 · 188
snow queen’s tears
ghost queen Dec 2021
above the din
of a yuletide storm

listen carefully
you can hear
a woman
sobbing

she’s
trapped
in an ice cave
a prison
of her own making

in agonizing
isolation
unloved
unknown
wishing
for the warmth
the touch
of another

afraid to love
of being hurt
closing off
her heart
to others

pristine and lovely
is the snowfall
from the queen’s
weeping
Nov 2021 · 101
muse
ghost queen Nov 2021
who is she
whispering in my ear
reciting tales
and stories  

seducing
then ****** me
with reality
and fantasies
Nov 2021 · 105
edit it later
ghost queen Nov 2021
live it
feel it
put it on paper
edit it later
Nov 2021 · 81
longing for love
ghost queen Nov 2021
I see the answer
in your eyes

feel it
in your kiss

the hunger
of your heart

the aching
of your soul

the longing
to be loved
Nov 2021 · 298
dumb luck
ghost queen Nov 2021
what is it
you truly
seek
want
desire
from life

the dumb luck
of ***** meets egg
that made you
flesh and blood

self aware
conscious
of the brevity
of life
and the finality
of death

like a match
temporarily
lighting
keeping
the darkness
at bay

only to be
swallowed up
devouring
all that was created
when extinguished
Nov 2021 · 72
bright star
ghost queen Nov 2021
you are
the bright star
in a dark sky
guiding me

to you
Nov 2021 · 83
snug & warm
ghost queen Nov 2021
the sun lingers
low
on the horizon
the sky
a patch work
of oranges
and iridescent purples

softly bluing
into black
darkness envelopes
stars light
flicker
twinkling
throughout the night

i feel it now
the loneliness
the yearning
for companionship

to hold and be held
safe and snug
in a loving embrace
of another
Nov 2021 · 101
electric cowboy
ghost queen Nov 2021
do you feel it
when we dance
in a closed embrace
the way I hold you
our bodies
as they move
saying so much
with so few words
Nov 2021 · 58
tango
ghost queen Nov 2021
do you feel it
when we dance
in a closed embrace
the heat of my body
softness of my breath
the way I hold you
delicate and gentle
my touch
says so much
Nov 2021 · 564
surrender to fate
ghost queen Nov 2021
The moment
you voluntarily
unconditionally
surrender
to fate
like a dried leaf
falling
to the ground
on a windy day
all your fears
worries
will vanish
and disappear
Nov 2021 · 53
the pursuit of happiness
ghost queen Nov 2021
happiness
is not the point
to life
but a byproduct
of consciousness

the pursuit of happiness
is a construct
of the disenfranchised
believing they’re entitled
to more meaning
from existence

brief moments of joy
strung together
to form an illusion
of contentment

are merely distractions
from the pain and suffering
of the human condition
Nov 2021 · 82
missing you
ghost queen Nov 2021
i feel it
when you’re away

an absences
a yearning
deep in my soul
Nov 2021 · 203
indifference
ghost queen Nov 2021
if god is not dead
then indifferent
to the human condition
as prayers are unanswered

the only difference
is how you behave
to love and cherish
and not hurt or hate
Nov 2021 · 279
soul of a cello
ghost queen Nov 2021
you feel so much
so deep
soul of a cello
so vulnerable to love
and hate
Oct 2021 · 89
earth kisses sky
ghost queen Oct 2021
pyrrhic is this victory
love replaced with hate
you stood on a plinth
now lay in a grave
earth kisses sky
rage & wrath
of lightning & thunder
when breaking hearts
clash & collide
Oct 2021 · 68
fibonacci + love = u
ghost queen Oct 2021
0 & 1 is 1                my
1 & 1 is 2                love
2 & 1 is 3                for
3 & 2 is 5                you
5 & 3 is 8                is
8 & 5 is 13              eternal
13 & 8 is 21            boundless
21 & 13 is 34          immeasurable
34 & 21 is 55          limitless
55 & 34 is 89          incalculable
89 & 55 is 144        unconditional
∞                             ad infinitum
Nerdy math love
Oct 2021 · 467
addicted to you
ghost queen Oct 2021
you’re a bag
a bent

a mind bending
addiction

i can’t stop
resist
or shake

i crave
hurt
need more

when spun
smokin rain
craving you

when you touch me
ever so slightly

fingers caressing
lingering

I ache
to the core

for slow kisses
brightly colored skittles
and marshmallow bunnies

you make me wet
crazy

thizzing
on X

i can’t get enough
of you
Oct 2021 · 108
sorrow & tears
ghost queen Oct 2021
late at night
alone
in the glow
of a candle
pen in hand
a muse
whispers
recites
a litany
of emotions
spilled
blotted
staining paper
redacted
through a stream
of tears
Oct 2021 · 1.9k
craving you
ghost queen Oct 2021
am i
in love

is this
what love
feels like

euphoric highs
suicidal lows

suffering withdrawal
anguish

craving you
like a drug

when you
are gone

elated
calm

only
when you’re here

and i’m in your arms
Oct 2021 · 117
poet's pride
ghost queen Oct 2021
poetry
is the realm
of intellectual
and emotional
aristocracy

forgive me
for my hubris
and folly
if you think this
a fallacy
Oct 2021 · 1.1k
heartbeats and whispers
ghost queen Oct 2021
early bluing
of an autumn sky
nip and chill
of a countryside

as seasons turn
things remembered
nostalgic
for a summer
lost in time

basking in the glow
of a fire
and the warmth
of a lover

snuggled deep
in each other

finding love
and shelter
between heartbeats
and whispers
Oct 2021 · 728
live & love
ghost queen Oct 2021
I write about love & life
while others live & love
Oct 2021 · 188
lonely girl
ghost queen Oct 2021
lonely girl
eating alone
in a corner
never looking up
from her book
wearing jeans
flip flops
and a sweater

you fascinate me
sitting there
oblivious
to your surroundings
a tourist
in my world

to approach
and talk
are you
a character
in my diary
or something more

i missed the moment
will never know
you paid the waiter
closed your book
met my eyes
smiled
turned
and disappeared
Nov 2, 2018 Friday Night  Bocce Italian Kitchen in Bishop Arts
Oct 2021 · 187
angel's touch
ghost queen Oct 2021
your touch
slow gentle tender
soothes
chases away
my fears worries anxieties
i am safe
to sleep
dream
love
give myself
to you
Oct 2021 · 98
slide into depression
ghost queen Oct 2021
desperately clinging
to a false sense
normalcy and acceptance
i seeked validation
in romantic relationships
when all that i cherish
has been taken away
i realize
that i’ve aged out
and lost my identity
stripped of purpose
and meaning
I don’t see any hope
or reason for being
i find solace
in addiction
i realized i’ve lost
and surrendering
accepting the fact
and letting myself slide
into another depression
Oct 2021 · 67
death row
ghost queen Oct 2021
living on death row
sequestered in a cell
never dreaming
no more hoping
living between tests
and a doctor’s stethoscope
a positive result
and i am
a dead man walking
Oct 2021 · 195
an angel’s dream
ghost queen Oct 2021
all and everything burns around us
a wall of flames consuming the world
a personal hell projected into reality
a final reckoning for our collective sins
none are absolved not even the innocent
an angel’s dream the beginning of the end
overwhelmed wrung out by the quotidian
too tired to fight too tired to care
we lay down and wait our turn to die
Oct 2021 · 131
the edge
ghost queen Oct 2021
as a child i was frighten, as an adult, i am weary when i walk the forest’s edge, a real and imaginary line between night and day, light and dark, life and death, the delineation of my tamed civilized world, and the chaos of the savage wilds.

i remember walking along the edge as a child, holding my mother’s hand, looking into the darkness, hoping to see something magical, to justify my fears, dismiss my suspicions, anything to alleviate the mundane, monotonous, insipidness of my bleak, desolate quotidian life.

i imagined mythical creatures in the forest, with the thrill and horror of an occasional siting of a real wolf trotting along the tree line, stopping at the site of me, making eye contact for a moment before slipping back into the darkness of the forest, feeling like prey, a rabbit in the middle of a meadow, hyper vigilant, knowing death is an instant away
Oct 2021 · 167
fatalism
ghost queen Oct 2021
meaning is a myth, reality an illusion
resigning to the black inescapable fatalism
accepting one’s fate is predetermined
or worse yet, accidental and serendipitous

we all know our end, the end is coming
our life, consciousness finite and limited
the moment when the light extinguishes
and we cease to exist
Sep 2021 · 59
wishing desperately
ghost queen Sep 2021
I just wanted
to be close to you
any excuse
to touch
press against you
feel the heat
from your body
smell your scent
taste your lips
reassuring soothing
melting away
my anxiety
hear your voice
feel your breath
warm and soft
against my neck
sending shivers
up my spine
wishing desperately
you’d kiss me
that night
on the dance floor
at the house of blues
Marsha, September 24, 2021, House of Blues Panoptikon Dallas
Sep 2021 · 1.1k
i envy them
ghost queen Sep 2021
i envy them
the young
their beauty
naitivity
effervescences
oblivious
of what’s to come

i envy them
but not their futures
the catastrophe
and horrors
oblivious
of what’s to come
Sep 2021 · 182
what is poetry
ghost queen Sep 2021
journaling of emotions?
    expressions of the heart?
        externalizing of thougts
            cathartic musing
                a rorschach test
                    therapy?
                        art?
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Creativity_and_mental_health
Sep 2021 · 295
dreams of love
ghost queen Sep 2021
the black box
called the mind
a byproduct
of physiology
dreams of love
a phantasm
of the heart
so two
can become
one
Sep 2021 · 109
pareidolia
ghost queen Sep 2021
it doesn’t exist
it’s a creation
of a black box
called your mind
absurd insane
pareidolia of the eye
seeing factuals
hoping there is order
terrified of the nothingness
pleading for grace
from a divine
ghost queen Sep 2021
youth ephemeral fleeting
only blooms during spring
attracts lovers in summer
fades in the gentleness of fall
dies in the icy blue of winter
Sep 2021 · 137
this fairy tale
ghost queen Sep 2021
this fairy tale
called love
is an illusion
a distraction
a respite
from the brutality
of the human condition
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