I went home yesterday.
And I learned there's no
Home
Left to come home to.

There is no space for who I was.

Sometimes a person's leaving allows for new life to grow.

I don't trust this new home either. I can feel the mold under a new coat of paint.

But perhaps I am jealous.

Because my parents have each other.
My siblings have parents.

And I don't have Any Body.

As a child I was better at spousing, mothering and daughtering.

Today I am lost.
Journeying perhaps.

Becoming.

I know that I can reach the sun,
I know you doubt and wonder.
But I can ride a thunderstorm
To catch the bolt of thunder.
I know you think i cannot
The truth yells from your eyes.
For they haven't learned to match up
To the part of you that lies.
For i see the sun as you do
It's only another star.
Too small and too distant
From where you stand and are.
From where I stand the sun is there,
Just waiting to be taken
By one that will distribute it
To the lonely and forsaken.
So that when its dark and overcast
They can take it as a hinter.
How there are times of less sun
In the dark and lonely winter.
But there's always enough warmth
In a world that stands and holds.
All the thousand stories
That it's people haven't told.

Sensitive.
whether

Too
or
Always

Is a victory of an accusation.

people in their wholeness
can only be understood.

not explained.

An ear can break a human heart
as can a word, an eye.
A ****** is inevitable
when perpetuating lies.

We, unaccustomed to courage
says Maya.
We, who have chosen
with choices we were not aware
of making
as we made them.

we need a revolution.
some courageous warriors
that will lead us into
liberation.

but the frontline soldiers
never come home.

They said you cant put a period in the middle of a sentence.
Can't start a thought with an and or a but.
But I did.
And I think the best place to put a period is wherever it belongs.
Because life has taught me that not all thoughts have a subject and a predicate.
Sometimes  an incomplete sentence ends in a period.
Or an exclamation mark!
And I've known too many people who's voices have been quieted midsentence.
Punctured by others who have punctuated their thoughts with a small and deliberate mark of ink.
Black ink.
Charcoal, the ashes of fire.
And I've known people who have ended their story with a period before having completed their thoughts.
For their energy ran out  before their thoughts had run through.
and a period seemed to them like the only way out.
For they imagined they had run out of paper.
But I put a period in the middle of a sentence because sometimes a sentence is complete when it's imperfect.
Like I am.
and sometimes I put a period in the middle of a sentence because sometimes a sentence is complete even if others can't understand it.
Like God is.

we fell out of love
as we fell in.
slowly.
and all at once.

desperate times call for desperate measures.
they say.
it's a life lived in desperation then.
a desperate hope.
so near to despair.

Spent formative time,
riding,
my wild horse
my wild mind
to the place
right before the world ends,
then Dedicated the rest of a lifetime,
to the effort,
of saddling her,
all the whilst wishing
shed just take off
one last time
and fly.

Tell someone often enough to shut UP
they will

shut
        d
           o
             w
                n.

I wonder at the ironies
of shadows and of light.
for the storm's shadow is a rainbow
and the sun's is black as night.
And i know where the rainbow hides
when the storm is dead
and i know where the shadows lay
after the sun has set
the rainbows sit in the sun
and shadows lay in the night
and i know because my life is
but shadows, rainbows, light.

i dare to wish
and tend to dream
for the alternative would be
a life of limited to worries
and what i know and see.
And some say that hope is futile
a live yet barren tree
but i believe in the thousand stars
that light the dark for me.
And hope may be the thing with feathers
but whats not said, yet's true.
Is that the thing with feathers
can fly right up to you
it can build a nest upon your window
and lay a golden egg
and i grant myself these empty dreams
so that i at least have that.