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All I remember was a bang
A flash but no pain
I remember the feel of the hollow barrel
Stuffed in my mouth
The discomfort of the seat
And how far the trigger seemed
Now I'm here
Finally able to grasp deaths hand
Yet my hand she refuses to take
Like a ******* she requires money
The ferry wont leave this dock
Till I pay the toll
Yet I have no money in my empty pockets
I only have the hearts and souls
Of every tear that fell when my funeral began
When the last black rose fell 6 feet
When the last petal wilted away
I can't pay deaths toll
With the limbs and intestines
Of every skeleton in my closet
I can't pay deaths toll
With the smell of my scattered brains
Still painting the corner of my room
My empty pockets can't pay death's toll
So I guess I'm off to living
The life I was never meant to live
**** it was just a dream
I'm making sure
I have money in my pockets
Or at least the still beating heart
Of my angels voice
Always wishing me goodnight
Just before I dream of never paying deaths toll
Bored still testing at school ***** so I ventured off to HP
watch the fire flash in my eyes
like
razorblades bearing down on metal
scratching off
silver skin.

the rolling of my naked hips brings more
than just
dynamite lust,
it brings a dragon alive in men,
whispering,
shredding,
screaming,
fire-breathing dragon warriors
ready to fight the wars waging
on my
glowing skin,
eager to be called the winner of my limbs.

with tornadoes in my fingernails
as i scratch their backs,
bringing earthly disasters in my
ethereal touch
as i sweat on top of them
with their hands wrapped like curling vines
around my dancing waist.

look into my eyes and you'll see
the sugar cane in my irises
the pleasure waiting,
the juice waiting to crunch like bones
and run through your teeth
if i only hand you the key.

normal girls wont kiss you
like i will,
and that's why when men look,
they see my curves like a gift from heaven
they want to hear what i have to say,
and at the same time devour me.
be confident.
you are wanted,
you are beautiful.
believe in it.
 Mar 2014 Krista Langford
casey
j
 Mar 2014 Krista Langford
casey
j
you were always more of a moon
than a sun.
that is, the sun is constant
a false sense of happiness
to get others through the day
probably wishing she could disappear
but you,
you were the least constant
yet most consistent thing
to me at least
like the moon you went through stages
but you decided it was time for a new moon
so you disappeared
completely
just enough to start
a new life
 Feb 2014 Krista Langford
thrcy
I told you to not fall in love with me, I said.

Because who would love a girl
who would rather spend time writing poetry about you
than acknowledging your existence

Why would you spend your time loving a girl
whose hobbies are pushing people away
and wavering opportunities as they pass by

And why would anyone want to love a girl like me
who leaves you behind just to be in her own little world
and completely forgets to bring you along with her adventures

For why on earth a boy like you love a girl
who'll constantly go on journeys all by herself
leaving you behind without any notice
and just randomly comes in to of your life again

How dare you fall in love with somebody like me
who can't even face her own demons and can't
admit to herself that she's scared of getting hurt
and doesn't want anybody getting close to knowing the real her
for they'll know how mess up and broken she is

To why would someone amazing as you love someone
who leaves you hanging all the time
with one word replies and wrecked expectations

So why bother to love a girl like me
even if hurts me so bad to do this so
I'll be the first to run away you
no matter how great I think you are
for I don't want to damage you as much as I have damaged myself

I am not like those other girls you speak of
who seems normal and very beautiful
so why love me instead?

Now why would you love me
when I can't even love myself and can't see beauty in me
a girl who is so indecisive about every single thing
and can't even go up to tell you how much shes cares
but rather admires you from a far

Please, don't waste your time loving me
because the time we share together
will just became a faded memory
made into a tragic poem
and you'll never know why it ended that way

It's worth it, he said.

You fell in love with a girl like me anyways
solving me like I'm this big mystery game
constantly trying to figure every part of me
to why I became this way
trying to fix me and help me become who I once was

So I let you fall in love with me, deeply into love
because you are the closest thing to happiness for me
and for once in my life
I can make a poetry filled with joy
for you have showed me true self love
and believed in me that I could get better
You were her friend* and yet on a starless night in the back room of an empty bar, you ripped away her innocence. She did not deserve a gag on her mouth and scratches on her cheeks. Blue bruises on the inside of her thighs constantly reminding her where you'd been.

You were her friend and yet you ripped away at her clothing as easily as if you were plucking the roots of a tree, and perhaps you were, because you dug her out and left her there to wither.

You were her friend and all you gave her was forced kisses reeking of whiskey and a bed sheet stained with her nightmare. There was no remorse in your eyes as you held her down and had your way. Again and again and again. You did not even wipe her tears.

You were her friend She did not deserve the whispers and glances in the hallway, your smile reminding her of what you did and your taunts when she sees you.

She was your friend She did not deserve dreams of a rope as a necklace and thoughts of a funeral where no one came.
 Feb 2014 Krista Langford
Chris
I said I’d never write about you again,
but I suppose I’m just as good at lying
as I am at leaving.
I’ve forgotten what your voice sounds like.
I always criticized you for not letting go,
as if the weights around my ankles
weren’t made of my faults
and everything I wish I could take back.
You told me today that
you’ve found love again.
I hope he finds flowers growing
from all the cracks I created
in your heart.
I hope he sees galaxies
in the darkened voids
I left behind your eyes.
I hope he understands
that you are full of splintered doors
on rusted hinges
that need to be loved and not repaired.
I hope he is nothing like me.
I’m sorry my words left scars.
I’m sorry my silence
reopened them constantly.
I’m sorry I was too busy
loving myself,
instead of loving you.
I'm pacing back n' forth in the recesses of my mind.
Thinking about tomorrow; as if I have the time.
I've got a book of regrets and a list of excuses.
Stitches for the cuts and ice for the bruises.
I've got the heart of a warrior but the guts of a coward.
And I'm always screaming inside my mind; as if silence could get any louder.

I'm trying to stay positive; I'm trying to learn.
But it's hard to move forward when your "success" is everyone else's concern.
They're always breathing down my neck and saying things like "you can do better!"
But I guess they don't know that my ambitions change with the weather.
I can't explain it or even begin to understand why.
It's something that's out of my control no matter how hard I try.
I wrote this several days ago. Never posted it. Enjoy.

— The End —