brown eyes and
slender thighs
used to belong to
me

i can't remember
when or why but
i gave them away for
free

all the letters
and the phone calls
crying about
everything
yet nothing

because in the end
that was all we were-
nothing

nothing to do
and
nothing to think
but there's something
missing
whatisitwhatisitwhatisit
i don't ******* know!

i look into her pale blue grey eyes
they are lifeless
empty
hollow
vacant
nothingness
when did the passion and meaning
leave her to defend for herself
before when you would look into
those beautiful blue eyes
they would light up whenever she
smiled
laughed
joked
or even just existed
now it's like she's fallen off the face of the earth
leaving behind a fragile shaking body
with no remnants of the girl i used to know

i am home again
at eighteen(failure)

when i look in the mirror
i can't decide who it is
i'm looking at

and for the first time
it's okay
not to know

i am home again
at eighteen (hopeful)

when i look in the mirror
i see
whoever i want to be

soft brown hair
kind hazel eyes
warm ethereal soul

she always thought i was her angel
but maybe she is mine