i went up to you
and said "i got a
C!" and you smiled
and knew that i
was very proud.
you gave me
permission to
get closer with
your eyes and
i did.

you then smiled,
asked when my next
test was and i
answered back,
"in two weeks."
you smiled and
then we became silent.

i looked at you and
decided it was time
to tell you how i
felt.

"congrats, i heard you're
engaged. thats amazing."
and he smiled and said,
"yes, i am. its wonderful,
thank you!" and he had this
light in his eyes when he
said this to me.

i told him to have a
good day and before he
said anything, i walked
out.

i felt the need to puke and
cry and i wasn't sure of
what to do because
I'm so completely in
love with you.

im so happy for him
and i know i shouldn't
feel this way but,
i really wish he had that
same light in his eyes
when he talks to
me.

I miss your familiarity
with my silence
your understanding
of my laughter
and your simple way
of letting me know
that I was not alone

It really gives you an appreciation
For the things you hate to do
When you are unable to do them.
It gives you an appreciation
For what you don't notice
When it hurts to notice them.
I want what I cannot have
Yet I still dream of you
The most unreachable thing of all.
Hidden away in your tree
In your books of things that many
Don't care to learn
But perhaps ought to.
A smile that brightens my day
Show it to someone
Fight these people tearing you apart
Show them your happiness
That you've shown me.
Enchant them
Fill them with wonder
And awe at your sheer
You  - ness
Look at this amazing world we take for granted
I know not how you see it
Nobody knows that
So show them
Show them with your life
Breathe it
And continue to amaze us all.

in the dark i saw a glow
    t he glow of a billio n
              s o f t       little cells.

and ******>   not yet feel ing any fear,
i became q u i e t-

                               i drew n e a r.  

y o u're so very   w arm.

We're all living
     for little deaths

Moments of some
     skewed inspiration

Pleasure out of desperation
of short-term goals

This is all now
right as I type this
Are you aware
that you're already
enlightened?

Stop searching
time is like string
and we're already right
where we need to be
******* with infinity

right here,
in this very ******* moment

Where your heart beats
     with empathic connection

With instant bliss
     knowing that together
     we all feel this