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You Were Red.
You Liked Me Cause I Was Blue.
You Touched Me;
And Suddenly I Was A lilac Sky And You,
Decided Purple Just Wasn't For You.
 Mar 2014 the disappeared
E
Sit in a crowded gymnasium
on a Thursday.
Basketball is not the point.

Stare at the orange speck anyway.
Silence your phone and his voice from before,
Still inside your head,
words the color of the burnt orange ball.

Find music in the squeak of the rubber soles,
Notice the referee's slanting stripes, and how they blur
when you stare, until even pictures inside your head blur.
Nod to the man wearing the red cap beside you,
whose words dribble across your mind,

They imprinting a message:
travel
next year
last year
time
killing
foul
out
losses
hope.

Maybe you miss that last word,
Or maybe you see the message graffitied on the score board.  
Maybe you close your eyes and open them again,
And notice the white jerseys gleaming in song with light,
The same light that slants up toward you,
Your shirt should also be white,
With the same light shining on those who travel
and on those who foul out.

Sit in the crowded gymnasium
on a Thursday,
and forget about what he told you last night.
I wrote this while observing other spectators at a State Basketball Tournament... It was interesting to speculate what was going on inside other people's heads in the crowd. This is not autobiographical.
No more ****. No more slavery. No more poverty.
Lady be free.
No more mutilation. No more denial. No more pain.
Lady be free.
We demand equality. We demand equity. We demand access.
Lady be free.
We desire these things, because you did.
Lady be free.
We were moved by your spirit.
Lady be free.
You moved action into progress.
Lady be free.
The world now has an opportunity to right a wrong.
Lady be free.
We can remove the last of humankind's chains.
Lady be free.
When we do, we shall all be free.
All be free.
 Aug 2013 the disappeared
neko
there is a hell, believe me, i've seen it. but it is not here. open your eyes & start walking--
the earth is not a cold dead place.
i like things that make me sleep or dream
although sleeping doesn't always imply dreaming
i'd like to think that i am dreaming a lot of the time

see, and the thing that bothered me the most about it was that
i remember a flashing light i'd stare at out in the distance at my own house
a 4am train or something maybe, i was never sure because sound never accompanied the sight

regardless coming to the staggering realization that i may never experience that small, trivial piece of time ever again in my life is

why i wrote this
 Apr 2013 the disappeared
Chuck
Even in the intoxication
Of sleep
Your eyes see clearly
Simple to do.
Difficult to find.
Stress, anxiety,
consume my breaths.
Let me find solitude,
to stop, relax.
Inhale, exhale.
 Apr 2013 the disappeared
Damaged
Get your **** together and stop being sad*

What you do not realize is that,
that is exactly what I do everyday.
Just to please society.

Every morning I wake up and put on a smile.
The smile that hides all my pain and tears.
Because if I showed how much I actually hurt,
I would just be judged.

Sometimes I feel that is all our society is;
they're a bunch of judgemental ******.
That is why I have to hide behind this mask;
and sometimes...that isn't even good enough.

So you see,
I do pull my **** together.
Every **** day.
Just to please everyone.
Got a text from a teammate telling to that I need to get my **** together and figure out what Im doing with my life...Dont you think I am trying?....Venting thoughts
Harp strings.
Heart stings.
Start things.
He sings.
Phone rings.
Rungs
on a ladder leading up,
Up,
Up, and away.
Say,
Why the ****
am I not enough?
No, just terrible, terrible luck.
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