You tell me how quiet I am,
and how I should talk more
But when I open my mouth to speak all you hear is a muffled voice
Trying to formulate a sentence while being suffocated by you
My voice is like background noise to you
You don't care about what I have to say
Everything I say is irrelevant news to you
But yet you tell me how quiet I am,
and how I should talk more

Why can't you stop being so perfect can't you see you're bringing my self esteem down every second you exist I can't even make eye contact with you because I always get lost in your beauty wondering why can't I look as good as you ******* and your perfect eyes, hair, body, and personality I hate you

written on February 16, 2014
Every time I see you it hurts
Your face reminds me of what could've been

Maybe if I hadn't have left we could've still been friends

I wonder if you mutter my name just to hear it roll of your tongue,
Or if you read all of our old text messages because dear God

*I still do

written
on February 13, 2014

My memory of you is like the scent of cigarettes drenched in my clothing and no matter how many times I wash them I can never seem to get rid of you in my mind.

You’re permanently stuck there like a tattoo implanted in my brain and I’d like to say it’s a nice feeling to know you’re always around but it’s not.

I want you gone, I don’t want to think of you because when I do the endless nights seem to get a bit longer and I’m here alone in my room writing a poem you’ll never see, being stuck on the memory of
you like a broken record player while you’re moving on with your life.

written on February 10, 2014

I really need to learn not to cringe when I hear your name and stop spending countless nights remembering how things used to be when things were simple.

The sun doesn’t shine as much without you and the nights seem longer than they were before.

Everyone else isn’t as interesting as you.

If people were stars you would be the sun.

My world revolves around you.

.        .        .

I miss the hugs you used to give me for absolutely no reason than “just because”

I always held on a bit longer than I needed to

You never noticed the same way you never noticed how little we talk now.

Our conversations were endless like the galaxy we live in

When you spoke you elaborated on what you said

Words flew out of your mouth like *****

But now?

Now all I get are one word replies and awkward hellos.

I miss your pale face and thin body and your brown hair with natural red highlights which I thought was so beautiful

It’s been so long since I’ve seen you I’ve forgotten the color of your eyes.

They

         Were

                 Brown

                          Maybe?

I can remember that they were gorgeous and had I sparkle to them that melted my ice cold heart

How could I be sad with you around?

I hate that we don’t talk but I can’t say it’s entirely my fault.

I’m trying.

I tried.