You rushed to my side
Even though I never called you
When I was slipping

Picked me up
When I had not told you
That I had fallen

Supported me
When I had not bothered to mention
My legs were weak and trembling

I don't know what
I would do, or be
Without you
For even the thought
Rings false in my mind

I feel as though I am nothing
On my own

I remember the first time
I saw your face
Heard your voice ringing out
Clear as a bell

You have been here
For what seems
Like ages

My chest is warm
And I am content
Know that I have you
At the beginning
Or when all else is spent.

(theinkthatspeaks.blogspot.com)

Just now, I saw another's heart
Open fully, and exposed
Ripped in two
Down my spirits came
And I could barely keep together
Night had come

For what I saw
Troubled me so
It broke my own heart
For someone I claim to love so
Is lost, alone

I did not know what to do
To mend their many woes
For I am just another
Just as shattered
And broken

There was no solution
No ultimate end
That I could carry them too
For the world is full
Of dark trials and enduring sorrow

So I hold them in my heart
And wish for their world to brighten
I hope
A flickering flame
That someday

Somehow, someway
They will be rescued
The time of their night run out
And a new dawn will
Into their life.

(theinkthatspeaks.blogspot.com)

We have shrouded ourselves in apathy
For our protection
From the vulnerable nakedness of our hearts
It is logical yet deeply troubling

We live in a world
Who has chosen not to care
Why do we pretend not to love with deep affection?
Why must we hide a joy for each other?

The romantic love for and of another
Seems to be the only release
Of this deep seeded desire
To love and enjoy, and live among

A vast crowd is all around every day
Their souls and stories so very grand
We long to know each other better
To understand the lives around for all they are

But for now
A fleeting thought lights hope
Someday the axis of the world might move
And our apathy will disappear.

(theinkthatspeaks.blogspot.com)

There is a great darkness
But behold
The light of day does come
It will shatter the night

There is a great pain
But wait
Relief will flow freely
And overwhelm the sorrow

There is a great fear
But wonder
Joy will rain like a storm
It will cover over the terror

There is a great *******
But rise
Chains will fall away
And restore the dejected.

(theinkthatspeaks.blogspot.com)

My wounds are bleeding
But still I pour salt in them
Why do I continue this way?

I am past the point of healing
Without ugly scars
I think

But right now
I would settle for just
The smallest bit of relief
From my aching body
Would be a welcome gift

There is something that
Keeps me at the knife
That threatens to take my life
I cannot break it's bind
On my own

I am not all alone
My only problem is
My voice grows small
When I want to call
Out for the help I so desperately need
My pride stops me

But my small heart
Beats on
At least for now.

(theinkthatspeaks.blogspot.com)

I am a ship
That has been iced in to arctic chains
For many years
Cold and blowing winds have frosted my sails
And encased my keel
For countless decades

But this long winter
Dark and dreary, with no time for Christmas
Has begun to become spring
Even though the first time I felt warm breezes
I was convinced
It was a deception

Despite every latent chill
When I lose my faith
These mild, lengthening days
I cannot deny
Nor disregard
The dawn breaking forth

My mast and bow are thawing
My hull starting to shift
The ice and snow falling into the sea
Now just chilling water
Cold
But no longer an icebound prison

I cannot wait for the day
When the last ice melts from my decks
And I can set sail on the open water
To voyage new seas, fresh tides
No longer just avoiding
A frost-bitten demise, threatening to lead me to my grave

These warm days
Have broken into my cabin
My maps and charts now colored
With budding trees, birdsong, and warm water
For someday, I do not doubt
I shall sail free, unbound in pleasant wind.

(theinkthatspeaks.blogspot.com)

One winter day
I felt my skin grow cold again
Against the old, familiar wind
So I prepared to descend
Into the dark and dreary street
I had taken so many times before

But this time
I was wrong

For though I turned toward the alley that led
Me always into my sadness
I found that I could not go far
The block had become impassable
By strength not my own
And this, was to my great surprise

Many times had I dreamed
That I would be unable
To wander down the dark lane
But for many years I had
Been disappointed

But now to find, the alley closed
I felt an enduring heat
Not a bright hot flame that often leaves
But a burning ember, steady

I do not know how long the passage
Will be blocked and impassable
But for now glad am I
The dream I dreamt, for time unmeasured
Has broken into reality.

(theinkthatspeaks.blogspot.com)

I stepped back
Took a breath
And was amazed

In my great hurry
I had changed
And grown

Through what I thought was a mess
There was a bright star
Not me
But my progress

I am still so surprised
For thought I thought I was just keeping above water
I actually swam up the stream
And took ground.

(theinkthatspeaks.blogspot.com)

Your words fall so quickly
And I feel so alone
I do not want to admit there is
Something wrong
But I, I am furious

I have tried a thousand times
And you, you have made me feel foolish
I have tried to play it down
Let it go
But no more

Why?
My mind wrenches in pain
I have followed you
Built you high
And now
What?

Another came and sought me out
Asked for my advice
They opened up
Showed love to me
Something you do no more
And never much before
If at all

I feel so wounded by your lack
Of care, of love
For scarce I feel that I have been
The object of your pursuit
And only an inconvenience

I hurt so much
And all the time
You know this, and know it full well
But now again you let me down
And leave me alone
So I can barely stand

I have tried a thousand times to stand alone
I cannot
And will not
Now

I often feel that I have been
Used and then abused
Not with words, or deeds
But with your callousness

So fine
I scream
Just have your way
Toss me aside, again
Shown me how you've grown to be
A man of carelessness

Now my heart feels warm
For in this new light of what I have long held inside
I have found a path to a new place
Where maybe someday, someone might know my name
But it now again it beats fear
That I shall be crushed should I rise again

Grief and sorrow
Sadness and sickness

A poor beggar in the mud
I feel I am
And as time does pass
My heart only beats a quiet thud.

(theinkthatspeaks.blogspot.com)

I cannot give my story
To any one person
And this I think
Might just rip me in half

I have to dole out pieces
And parts carefully
For not all can know all
That lives inside of me

I sometimes dream of someone
Who can hold all of my heart
But I feel the more I search
The more I break apart

I have many whom I love
And hold dear to my heart
But none of them
Can fully mend each part

Someday I dream of meeting
Someone who is different
Who I can trust fully
And give all and everything

I know I am not alone
In this, my sacred desire
I catch it in glimpses
In their eyes and their words

But for now I still carry on
With tears behind my eyes
For all long to be discovered
And gratefully received.

(theinkthatspeaks.blogspot.com)

I feel the pain too brother
In my bones, I feel it as you fall
Lash for lash and scar for scar
My head smashes down the stone steps
Crash for crash and drop of blood for drop of blood

But what runs between us, brother
Is more than those red splatters on the filthy ground
For you, time and time again
Have proved water is in fact thicker than blood
And bonds chosen closer than those of flesh

Water carries your pain to me, brother
Lost joy from palaces of princesses
And despair from dungeons of ******
New scars from those thought to be friends
And wounds from laughter of enemies

I hope when we and not just you brother, bear the load
Your bleeding stops a little sooner
Water cleaning and cleansing the wounds
I hope weight shouldered together
Will fight back stronger against all that is destroying you

And we, lash for lash and blow for blow
Will fall twice on the murderous brows against you
Bound by water, our mighty weapon
For when you fall, we fall together
Because you've taught me brother when I fall, you will too.

You know
I'm not quite sure
About the love of princesses
Satin gowns and evening *****

I've dreamed of it all for so long
I'm not sure I believe it anymore
Because all I found in the arms of a woman
Is hurt, heartache, and sorrow

But I have found the love of a brother
Is richer than a thousand kings
The arm of a friend
Stronger than a thousand warriors

It seems so strange
For we chase and we chase
Happy endings, summer love, and romantic kisses
And value love above all other ends

And love is higher
It overcomes all
Gives strength like no other
And is in itself an end

But what I am starting to believe
Beginning to find
Is we are wrong
About what kind of love we really, truly need.

Cardboard box on an empty street
Snow lightly falling
A small figure, huddled inside

I hear her begging
Just for a light
Her hands are blue
Her hope all run out
Nothing left in her
No more will to go on

I want to move on
Enough cold already in my heart

A small timid whisper
Comes from her mouth
Not more than a breath
Nothing close to a word

A streetlamp shine nearby
It lights up the box
And hearkens the sky
The small face stares up
Timid and frozen

I do not know what I have to give
But I open my heart
I reach out, and.

(theinkthatspeaks.blogspot.com)

It's not just the words
But the melody
When a song cascades into the air
It is glorious

It resounds off the walls
And rushes into hearts
More than the simple stanza heard
But the origin, the meaning

Voice reveals heart
The majesty of it
Fills a room
An enduring journey to be truly seen

What is longed to be screamed
Like a rushing waterfall
Bursts through
And saturates everything

Oh the astounding thrill to be alive
And know what it is
To feel, to love, to hurt
To be lost and then found.

(theinkthatspeaks.blogspot.com)

Up among the eaves and rooftops
I am searching
I am seeking
But I have yet to find

My eyes wander
Hoping to discover a rhyme or reason
In this constant turmoil and disarray
This is my one desire

Though my search has been fruitless, I wait
For in all the confusion and chaos
I am certain
There is an overarching blueprint, a master plan

I rest, and then stand tall
Looking out at the bright city lights
A mess of colors and sounds
All coming together into one.

(theinkthatspeaks.blogspot.com)

Rain soaked the windows while I barely held on
And then on that night, I broke wide open
I was unable to continue, so I simply fell apart
Not quietly, but tear-soaking my bed

Rain then spoke, on that fateful evening
And in the same moment that
I was torn me to pieces, it
Now told me to rest in my sorrow for a little while

Relentlessly my brokenness continued to pour, like the storm
All truth of myself, that I never seen before
I was taken aback at what I myself revealed
New knowledge made all come into focus

Right after, my eyes still wet
A strange peace grew
Inside my chest for just a while
Nothing had changed, but still I was renewed.

(theinkthatspeaks.blogspot.com)

Click
My mind closes the door, and locks it

Pound
On the door, begging to be let out

Why?
Do I consider it

Closer
I walk, unaware yet aware of the danger inside

Consider
The inside of the locked seems better than before

But
I know the lie

False
A life I do not want lies inside

Walk
From the door, like a man in chains

Dark
The room behind the does lies

Broken
The things inside will shatter me

Yet
I turn, and look ahead.

(theinkthatspeaks.blogspot.com)

Come with me
To home you've never entered
Grief and pain
Will swiftly be washed away
Joy and gladness here
My love will take you
And you'll see
You're now in a new day

Come with me
My darling, my beloved
And now we
Will live together always
Leave behind
Everything that plagues you
From now on
Only ever be free

Come with me
And learn to sing a new song
Learn to fly
On higher, fairer wings
And you shall find
You are now like the sparrows
Soaring high, above
And ever free

And many years will pass in this new haven
You shall rest like you have never before
And your shall look back upon your sorrows
And see that they are as just a dream.

(theinkthatspeaks.blogspot.com)

I need words
And not empty phrases
To convey
Kindly
What my stumbling mouth cannot

To show love
And not forth hatred
In words that tell truth
That is difficult
To receive

I do not have these words
And hope they will
Be poured into my mind.

(theinkthatspeaks.blogspot.com)

Lonely people
In a lonely world

Surrounded, yet walled off
By so many things
Pride
Anger
Fear
And more

How strongly we make sure
We stay alone
Which is so strange
Because that is
What tears us down
What breaks us apart

And yet, ironically
It's the thing that we all share
Loneliness

It's sad and its not
In our heads, but all around us

And the spark, the idea
Of being perfectly intertwined
What a unsettling
And captivating thought.

(theinkthatspeaks.blogspot.com)

A loud noise
Shoots through the air
And explodes

It then echoes
Not just off the walls
But off many hearts

The word spread quickly
A land watches
And weeps

Leaders clad in iron nerves
Pause a moment
To gather themselves

And so this dark sorrow
Fills each heart
That hears the echo

Young children
Never to grow old
Gone in a moment

And so we are
Sad soldiers, wanting to fight
A war already lost.

Lying in my bed, my mind begins to stir
Glowing lamplights of reminiscence

I can still remember all the moments
In my life
That defined me
Shaped my being

I still can picture them
And I treasure them
Bright jewels in the dust
Not all good, still none bad

I can still see the lights shining, thoughts rushing
Through my head

I wish you were with me
I'm falling apart
I love you, even after what you did.

(theinkthatspeaks.blogspot.com)

I worry that my demons will
Come and then consume me
Then throw my body to the ground
Rendered lifeless

I do not want their dark ways
Their tales of hopeless woe
I want to rise victorious
But I do know not how to go

They take me, piece by piece
Each time they push me a little further
My eyes they pour, twin waterfalls
They cannot express all my sorrow

I need an escape, a path
How long will I wander?
I am a train on an endless track
I cannot see the end

Why do my demons come?
Why do they want my soul?
For I feel a poor beggar
Not worth my salt

All I want is peace
And release from this danger
I beg and plead
By to my dismay, they will not let me go

I feel so all alone
I do not have a friend to turn to
All my need has used my goodwill
The love now I want, I used

My greatest concern
Is that I will embrace the dark
And not look back
I do not want this

I cannot shake the feeling
That this is what I have coming
Where shall I turn?
What shall be my harbor?

I am a cup
Turned over, poured out
A little hope trickles in
I sigh and press on.

(theinkthatspeaks.blogspot.com)

What I do
I do not for the end
But for the journey
And the wisdom

Sometimes it's hard
When I feel that I have failed
But I must remember
I have not
If I have learned my lesson

Others think me strange
And hold their trophies
High

I have no prizes
Simply kind words
Spoken to me

In the end
The honor shall fade
But the wisdom
Will endure.

(theinkthatspeaks.blogspot.com)

An open door
That was not
Around before
You looked another time

Walk through it
For it was made for you
Run through to the world through its frame
Whatever is on the other side

Live and love
Laugh and sing
For the door shows
Exactly the way you should go

As clear as a command
But more beautiful, more true
For not only does it provide instruction
But a perfect route

Walk boldly
Through it
Don't look back for a second
Or second guess

Though trouble may wait on the other side
It was intended for you
To shape you
And make you

Let the door make you free
To be all you can
Look with fresh eyes
Expectantly.

(theinkthatspeaks.blogspot.com)

Face the winter
Or it will consume you

Face the winter
Or you will surely falter

I woke one morning
And found the morning's dawn
With icy fingers
Had reached down and grasped my world

Face the winter
Though it freezes your face
And whitens your hair

Face the winter
Though the winds nearly blow you over
And you can only stagger

I tried to ignore the winter
And live in a dream world
Of spring, summer, and clear blue skies
But in my heart I knew it was a lie

Face the winter
Or it will destroy you

Face the winter
And you shall stand strong.

(theinkthatspeaks.blogspot.com)

The laughter of a friend is sweeter than the purest sugar
The comfort of brother cannot be measured in price

I have fallen in love with those around me
I never saw it coming
Not the love of secret whispers or stolen kisses
But love all the same

I want to fall in that other kind of love someday
With a woman who causes my heart to skip a beat
Every time she walks past

Before I find on myself bended knee
Or have to share my bed
Before my happy endings and ride off into the sunset
I want to fall in love everyday
With everything

I want to fall in love with the way the morning sun hits the trees
Every morning on the way to my busy life.

(theinkthatspeaks.blogspot.com)

A final no
Phrase complete
With tongue and lips and mouth she speaks

And I am gone
A black hole of pain
With nothing here left to gain
Everything I hoped to be
Was bound in her; and not in me

The dream collapsed
And I am done
From now on I shall just be one

A flicking hope
Now shut out
My heart has no strength, it cannot shout

The words I utter
Seem to be
No longer wholly part of me
Just empty phrases
Parts of past
A stranger here; alone at last

I feel strange peace that hope is gone
For now alone, I carry on

My body broken
My spirit crushed
Alone in chains of past and fear
My heart no longer whole is here

I battle and rage
But when I cannot go on
I do not fall apart
I simply go away
A ghost of another day
If all I feel I do pen here
Why do I need another ear?
Their life more pertinent then mine
It's for their sake, I pen this line

I still do tarry among the past
Because I hold so very fast
To hopes and dreams of days gone by
When I had hoped to try to fly
I still do want to rise above
Rising strong, in hope and love

But I know this faltering dream
Is nothing more than something unseen
Unseen in heart
Not in the plan
I hold until I cannot stand

By why I rise?
For 'er I fall
A lone warrior in an empty hall

With mouth and lips and tongue she speaks
A final no
Phrase complete.

(theinkthatspeaks.blogspot.com)

Denial lingered
Like an old friend
Unwilling to go

Then anger came
Storming in
And ripping apart my soul

Bargaining then arrived
Reluctantly
For it bore a painful price

Depression I fear
Is setting in
And permeating my soul

Acceptance is a flighty bird
I have yet to catch
But when I do, what then?

(theinkthatspeaks.blogspot.com)

The kindness of a friend
Is like rain
On a land besieged with drought

It fills the soul
And wets the eyes with tears
It brings hope to a hopeless place

The love of a friend
Is like a thousand lights
In a dark room without windows

It floods with new light
And now made whole
Overwhelming joy in a place of great fear

The words of hope, spoken by a friend
Are like the fire of a lighthouse
To a ship on a stormy night

It opens the heart
And breaks sadness apart
In its place a new song.

(theinkthatspeaks.blogspot.com)

I one day decided
That I would try
To race to higher ground
And as soon as the thought
Had left my mouth
The ground grew higher
Thickets and brambles seemed to grow
In a matter of mere minutes

But still I went
With brave heart
And delved into the thicket

The more I ran
The more I hurt
And feel and bruised my knees
But carried on

I found my legs were growing weak
Much too quickly
My calves burned
And I fell
I cut my face

I kept on for a long time
Though it was rather painful
And then I realized I had gone
A very short way

And so I cried out
Why, oh why?
Does the land fight back when so hard I try?

And a voice
Inside my head
That is not my own
Whispered

It said
Do you not see?
Are you so blind?
When you struggle so
You are made strong
Though you have not gained miles
You have grown
Grown more than you can see
From your current state
Now you are as you should be

You spend your time
Searching and seeking
For wisdom you do not have
You see you are not the end
Not should you be
And so
You have grown.

(theinkthatspeaks.blogspot.com)

I cannot speak enough, of how

When you strode into my life
Instantly, my chains and vices shattered
Sadness and sorrow melted away
Hope sprung, in ways I had never before seen

You filled the hole in my heart
Opened my eyes
Used old darkness to prove new light

Where have you gone?
Escaping my sight?
Running from me?
Evading my pleas?

How can I show you I need you, here?
Enter my life again
Reopen my heart and revive me
Envision a bright new future of us, together.

(theinkthatspeaks.blogspot.com)

I left the world below
Now high above a darkened sky
My troubles far below
Are moving out of sight

At first I did not know
Where I could find freedom
But here among the stars
My heart is now so light

The mess that I did leave
I no longer could clean
And so I take to the heavens
Letting these earthy chains go

And oh the freedom I feel
As I escape from this darkened time
Is a thousand shouts of joy
Calling from my heart

The snow and rain and mud
That littered where I trod
Can no longer touch my feet
Or threaten to hold me down

And while I feel sad
That I have left my all
My soul is now at peace
To sail upon the air.

(theinkthatspeaks.blogspot.com)

I cannot speak enough of how

When you strode into my life
Instantly, my chains and vices shattered
You taught me how to stand unbound
And healed my many scars

My new strength let me
Prevail against all that before had felled me
Unimaginable was the change you brought

But I still feel pain, still struggle
New trials still pierce my heart

I thought that if I shed my old scars
That I would feel less pain
And walk though the world, unharmed
But you have revealed
My heart is ever open, exposed

This new hurt shall again become my strength
But for now

I long for you to be here.

(theinkthatspeaks.blogspot.com)

I search and seek for wisdom
Desperately
I look high and low
Near and far

Hoping to just find a glimpse
It seems like the sky is dark
And all I need is just a hint of light
Rising over the horizon

There has to be a way to go
I know certainly
Finding it
Is the tricky part.

(theinkthatspeaks.blogspot.com)

There is nothing
Like the sweet feeling of home
Peace and quiet
Safe and sound

Outside the world is waiting
I can see it out my window
In all of its glory
And I rejoice
For all that it is outside
Seems at the more beautiful

Life is short
And safety passing
So I rest for now
In the home I have built.

(theinkthatspeaks.blogspot.com)

I am looking for greatest love
Longing for true home, rest
Searching on and on for peace of heart

I want to find myself covered, sheltered
No longer exposed and vulnerable
But finding that my weeping has passed on

Joy, no longer a mere cover for sorrow
But an unfurling expression
Of who I am, what I have become.

I am hurting
And I know I should pick myself up
But I have not the strength
Not even a little bit
Someone
Somewhere
Please come and save me
For I am broken.

(theinkthatspeaks.blogspot.com)

If you were a tree
I would rest at your trunk
Stare up into your branches
And marvel at your grandeur

If you were a tower
I would race up your stairs
Discover your hidden rooms
Watch the sun rise from your roof

If you were a boat
I would set sail with you
Travel the world
Discover new lands by your passage

If you were an island
I would sail to your shores
And settle there
Building a new life

And I wonder

Would you know my leaves?
Come through my doors?
Row me through the sea?
Find refuge in my port?

(theinkthatspeaks.blogspot.com)

My heart hangs
On the buzz of my phone
In the small chance
That someone important
Might be checking up

My eyes well up
When I hear a song
And speaks of something
I feel I should know
Midst piles of notes
I cannot help
But be overwhelmed

My joy rests
On the response I get
From the words I type
Just for the chance
To share my story
Another time

I want to be alive
And matter
I want to live a life
That is more than just a small spark

I believe
That I was created for something
So great
And so overwhelming
That I cannot stand it

I just want my story to fall
Out of me
I want it to matter
I want it to mean something

I often pretend
That I am in some great film
That the poor view I have
Makes sense in another lens
With the right melodies
Playing at the right time

I like to imagine
That the friends I have
Desire to know me more
But I do not know this is true
So I look for small signs
And hang myself
On little failures.

(theinkthatspeaks.blogspot.com)

In my head
New ideas appear
So quickly
Plunging into my mind
Imagining worlds
Revealing fresh secrets
And lifting me up
To higher places
I have not seen
On other occasions
New lights in my sky.

(theinkthatspeaks.blogspot.com)

It hurt like hell
When I walked away
But I am glad it was me
And not you

For if it was you
It would have killed me
For sure.

(theinkthatspeaks.blogspot.com)

Juliet
Our love isn't illicit
Or secret

Your parents and mine
Are friends
Is that okay?

I love a good story
With a happy ending

But right now
I just want you in my arms
Our own problems
Less dramatic

You and I
Will not be on a TV screen
Or a magazine
But a photo album
Smiling at each other
Is that okay?

I hope so
Because outside of all this fuss
I just want you
For you

For your smile and your laugh
Your quirks
And inconsistencies.

When will the last storm hit?
When will the last war be waged?
My heart wonders

My land is so tired
Her people mourn
For all is not well

But they see it should be different
They understand there is a greater way

Their weeping haunts my soul
I wish I could take it away
Though I am one of them
I see them
And desire
To fill their homes with joy
Their hearts with hope
And their eyes with beauty

Their voice echoes off the cliffs
And goes out to sea

Someday their call will be heard
And though I cannot rescue them
I believe they will be found

And oh, to see their faces
Alive.

(theinkthatspeaks.blogspot.com)

Just let me rest
For now
Leave me to my peace
For a little while

Let me walk my own path
In the quiet

I am sorry
Because I know this will hurt you
But it is not
Because I do not trust you
But because I do

I just need a little space
From everything
And you
Are tangled up in it all

And I?
I am at my breaking point
And I don't want you here
For that mess
For I know you
And you do not need that
Even though you would want
To support me

Love me enough
To let me go
For now
Or a little longer than that.

(theinkthatspeaks.blogspot.com)

Someday I wish
That my strength could be transferred
That I could cry the tears for another
And lift their burden

For the inability
To change another's mood
Or give them joy
Gives me pain

I see the look
And know there is a story
Sense the world feels like it is crashing
All around them

Oh to be strong enough
To lift them up and let them soar free
I will never get over
This unquenchable desire.

(theinkthatspeaks.blogspot.com)

Chaos echoes all around me
And I hear the nations raging as they fall
Still my hands are steady
Still my heart is sure

I should be shaking as the world crumbles
I should be ready to stumble
For it seems inevitable
But for now, I do not fall

And this is a great wonder, so surprising
Running through me in untold ways
I have been made strong
And as bold as a lion

So I strive to use my new strength
Though unsure
What caused it to come
Or what gives it the will to continue.

(theinkthatspeaks.blogspot.com)

Losing
The majestic act
Letting it all
Rush downward

Dreams and hopes
Fall
Out of sight

For they are not all
And need to be lost
For the sake
Of what is all

Little deaths
Small tragedies
Of desire

And this is hard
The act of losing
And letting go

For it hurts so
This small act
Of dying

So that life and light
Will come
Amidst the raindrops.

(theinkthatspeaks.blogspot.com)

I tried to open the door to your heart
But you held it shut
And I do not know quite why you did
Which hurts

I wanted to peer inside you
Enter into your life and give you aid
Win you over and show you all was well
Make at least some sort of difference

But right now
It seems that I will not be

I hope it was not selfish
My desire to help you out
Though sometimes I fear it was
But still, I am not sure

I do not wish to again
Smash myself upon the rocks of repentance
Unless I need to

I know this for sure
That in my heart I hope, I desire
That I wanted this for you

So for now I will love
In whatever way I can
From outside the door I will show you I care
For you
Not just for me.

(theinkthatspeaks.blogspot.com)

Lonely and alone again
He weeps and wonders
His low voice just more than a whisper, murmurers out

Does anyone else want to be loved so badly?
Do I alone hurt so deeply and not know why?
Will anyone else ever find me?

He feels so sad and so foolish
But all he wants is someone to come into his life
To really love him, and want him around

For all his life he has loved more than he has been loved
And it hurts like hell
And he doesn't know what to do

He has tried to play it down
And pretend like it doesn't bother him
But it cuts him deep

He sometimes thinks he may not be alone
But it is so hard to tell
And he is afraid to ask

He worries if he tells people how much he wants love
That they will all run away
In fear that he might consume them

Lately it has gotten worse
And he doesn't know what to do anymore
He screams, he cries, he falls apart

How many times can I fall apart before it is all over?
Does anyone else understand?
Is anyone else as desperate as I?

(theinkthatspeaks.blogspot.com)