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431 · Feb 2013
My heart's song.
Taylor Stein Feb 2013
For many years I have heard my heart
It sings a song
A quiet one
That is beautiful
And yet haunts me

This wordless melody that it sings
Is so breathtaking
It brings my eyes to tears
For my heart
Longs for so very much more

My heart I have found
Has not learned
To let go
Of its desire for perfection
At least
It has not yet

I have spoken to my heart
And told it
Its goals are much too lofty
My heart ignores me
And continues to dream
As if it had not heard me

Waiting for a miracle
For so long
My heart alone
Traverses on
And I have not the will to stop
This ever-present hymn.

(theinkthatspeaks.blogspot.com)
424 · Dec 2012
Cleansing rain.
Taylor Stein Dec 2012
Rain soaked the windows while I barely held on
And then on that night, I broke wide open
I was unable to continue, so I simply fell apart
Not quietly, but tear-soaking my bed

Rain then spoke, on that fateful evening
And in the same moment that
I was torn me to pieces, it
Now told me to rest in my sorrow for a little while

Relentlessly my brokenness continued to pour, like the storm
All truth of myself, that I never seen before
I was taken aback at what I myself revealed
New knowledge made all come into focus

Right after, my eyes still wet
A strange peace grew
Inside my chest for just a while
Nothing had changed, but still I was renewed.

(theinkthatspeaks.blogspot.com)
Taylor Stein Apr 2013
We are
The How I Met Your Mother Generation
Like it or not
We are

We are all
Chasing a yellow umbrella
That will lead us to a new beginning

For in our lonely lives
We are constantly searching and seeking
For those warm arms clasping that blessed shelter from the storm
Hoping it will spare us from the rain in our own lives
Wishing that then
It will finally all make sense

The sad part is
That heart is not the end
And our tears will still flow

We know our lives are not all that they should be
You can see it in our eyes
Hear it in our voices
But what can we do?
So we chase after the One
Hoping they will bring us new life

It's sad in one way
For we are not made of some mysterious person, future lover
But in another way
It brings hope
For we have learned
That we cannot acquire and buy our way to completeness.

(theinkthatspeaks.blogspot.com)
420 · Dec 2012
Expectantly.
Taylor Stein Dec 2012
An open door
That was not
Around before
You looked another time

Walk through it
For it was made for you
Run through to the world through its frame
Whatever is on the other side

Live and love
Laugh and sing
For the door shows
Exactly the way you should go

As clear as a command
But more beautiful, more true
For not only does it provide instruction
But a perfect route

Walk boldly
Through it
Don't look back for a second
Or second guess

Though trouble may wait on the other side
It was intended for you
To shape you
And make you

Let the door make you free
To be all you can
Look with fresh eyes
Expectantly.

(theinkthatspeaks.blogspot.com)
411 · Dec 2012
Never grow old.
Taylor Stein Dec 2012
Some day, all die
But not all need
To grow old
Not in years, but in desire to shine
For old is not a number, but a lack of luster

Strive against losing the taste for life we presently hold
But still without fear of what comes next
For it
Must surely be
Another great adventure

But here
And now
The greatest dark thought we might employ
Is to one day lose all of our joy
And all that matters

The grandeur of the sky after a rain
Tied like a package, with a bow
The desire
To live loudly
Running, jumping, and lingering
To let ourselves run free

The frightening idea
Of losing hold of who we are
Our guiding lights, northern stars
To forget what we most enjoy
For small comforts of little true value
And endless pursuits not worth the gain

So we shall laugh much much too loud
Raise our voices above the crowd
Love vastly beyond reason
Open our hearts time and time again
So they do not close.

(theinkthatspeaks.blogspot.com)
409 · Jan 2013
Face the winter.
Taylor Stein Jan 2013
Face the winter
Or it will consume you

Face the winter
Or you will surely falter

I woke one morning
And found the morning's dawn
With icy fingers
Had reached down and grasped my world

Face the winter
Though it freezes your face
And whitens your hair

Face the winter
Though the winds nearly blow you over
And you can only stagger

I tried to ignore the winter
And live in a dream world
Of spring, summer, and clear blue skies
But in my heart I knew it was a lie

Face the winter
Or it will destroy you

Face the winter
And you shall stand strong.

(theinkthatspeaks.blogspot.com)
407 · Feb 2013
Lonely.
Taylor Stein Feb 2013
Lonely and alone again
He weeps and wonders
His low voice just more than a whisper, murmurers out

Does anyone else want to be loved so badly?
Do I alone hurt so deeply and not know why?
Will anyone else ever find me?


He feels so sad and so foolish
But all he wants is someone to come into his life
To really love him, and want him around

For all his life he has loved more than he has been loved
And it hurts like hell
And he doesn't know what to do

He has tried to play it down
And pretend like it doesn't bother him
But it cuts him deep

He sometimes thinks he may not be alone
But it is so hard to tell
And he is afraid to ask

He worries if he tells people how much he wants love
That they will all run away
In fear that he might consume them

Lately it has gotten worse
And he doesn't know what to do anymore
He screams, he cries, he falls apart

How many times can I fall apart before it is all over?
Does anyone else understand?
Is anyone else as desperate as I?


(theinkthatspeaks.blogspot.com)
401 · Dec 2012
Screaming at the sky.
Taylor Stein Dec 2012
I screamed at the sky
Begging for the battle to end
So I could rest, and find a home
For I have fought for many years
Yet still I walk alone

But as soon as the words had left my mouth
I knew what I asked
Was not a wish that would come true
And in this moment I should not desire it to
Though I do endeavor
To see it come and make me new

For though I long for home and peace
That is not what my lot is
I must battle on my land
But not do it only for the end
But also for the honor I hold
And the call I have been given

For the fight is a call much higher and greater
Than just to rest in temporary feeling

This revelation made it harder and nearly broke my heart
But then my eyes fell on some words, written long ago
They spoke of the great desire
Of each man's heart
For home, for rest, for love
And I was overwhelmed; for I knew I had never been alone

My beating heart is not the only one
In what it yearns
This knowledge made me a able to stand
The battle now more bearable
For though it shatters the bones and pierces the flesh
Is there not a greater glory?

For men do not write tales of those who sat
And rested in the quiet
But pen tales of those who raged
Against all that would surely destroy them
So I will fight for many, many years

I believe someday my call will change
My battle will end, I will rest
But should I fight only for that end
I would fight in vain
So I fight for the honor, the subtle joy
That comes in the present struggle.

(theinkthatspeaks.blogspot.com)
400 · Jan 2013
Another's heart.
Taylor Stein Jan 2013
Just now, I saw another's heart
Open fully, and exposed
Ripped in two
Down my spirits came
And I could barely keep together
Night had come

For what I saw
Troubled me so
It broke my own heart
For someone I claim to love so
Is lost, alone

I did not know what to do
To mend their many woes
For I am just another
Just as shattered
And broken

There was no solution
No ultimate end
That I could carry them too
For the world is full
Of dark trials and enduring sorrow

So I hold them in my heart
And wish for their world to brighten
I hope
A flickering flame
That someday

Somehow, someway
They will be rescued
The time of their night run out
And a new dawn will
Into their life.

(theinkthatspeaks.blogspot.com)
390 · Dec 2012
Connecticut.
Taylor Stein Dec 2012
A loud noise
Shoots through the air
And explodes

It then echoes
Not just off the walls
But off many hearts

The word spread quickly
A land watches
And weeps

Leaders clad in iron nerves
Pause a moment
To gather themselves

And so this dark sorrow
Fills each heart
That hears the echo

Young children
Never to grow old
Gone in a moment

And so we are
Sad soldiers, wanting to fight
A war already lost.
387 · Nov 2014
Home/late night thoughts.
Taylor Stein Nov 2014
I am looking for greatest love
Longing for true home, rest
Searching on and on for peace of heart

I want to find myself covered, sheltered
No longer exposed and vulnerable
But finding that my weeping has passed on

Joy, no longer a mere cover for sorrow
But an unfurling expression
Of who I am, what I have become.
380 · Jan 2013
Come with me.
Taylor Stein Jan 2013
Come with me
To home you've never entered
Grief and pain
Will swiftly be washed away
Joy and gladness here
My love will take you
And you'll see
You're now in a new day

Come with me
My darling, my beloved
And now we
Will live together always
Leave behind
Everything that plagues you
From now on
Only ever be free

Come with me
And learn to sing a new song
Learn to fly
On higher, fairer wings
And you shall find
You are now like the sparrows
Soaring high, above
And ever free

And many years will pass in this new haven
You shall rest like you have never before
And your shall look back upon your sorrows
And see that they are as just a dream.

(theinkthatspeaks.blogspot.com)
373 · Dec 2012
The smallest moment.
Taylor Stein Dec 2012
How amazing the smallest moment of cheer
For it can cover
The dead, the ugly

For each fraction of a second
Adds up
And makes the view more and more majestic
Forever

It is like the winter snow
And not
It does cover in the pure, the white
But will not melt from sight
Nor disappear

It covers the woods
Yet still brings them life
Drifts onto the hills
But makes them all the more welcoming

For these precious flakes of the times of warmth are
Of such slight size
So their strength is in their force
Together.

(theinkthatspeaks.blogspot.com)
372 · Jan 2013
The turn or rise.
Taylor Stein Jan 2013
Do new beginnings last?
Do triumphant battles always start in the upper hand?
Are heroes born from on high?

Or is it the opposite?

Do flash beginnings end more swiftly?
Do battles overturn in a moment?
Are heroes made to stumble?

With these questions
I face a new day
A sun rising
Pink and orange bursting above the horizon

My heart is new
My mind clear
But I do not know
Nor can I see
The end

But this, my peace and rest
That I know
All I do
I do not in vain

And so whether I rise or fall
Live or die
None is without purpose.

(theinkthatspeaks.blogspot.com)
372 · Dec 2012
No escape.
Taylor Stein Dec 2012
I cry
I scream
My hurt is so deep
I cannot hide it much longer

Those around me ask why
My heart is heavy and eyes nevery dry
I have not reply

For what I seek
I cannot find
I search and search, nothing I seek can I make mine

I stumble around
Like a drunk in the night
Yet my mind is sober, and all around is light

I hear words of joy
But they seem so false
My self is waning

For I feel I am gone
And what I had is gone
Regret my only friend

One and just one
Forgotten I feel
Forsaken, dejected, no way to heal

How can I escape?
Yesterday has past
My choices are done
No way to turn back
Sorry to no avail

All that I see I made for myself
Now I look ahead
Darkness I see

Full of fear
Undone in my core
No longer full
Empty and more
Any light would change my life
Raise my spirits
And shatter my night
Life evades me

Melts my will
Around and around, I am tossed
Ready to break
Cold to the bone
Hardened to joy, no fuel for my song
Ever so small
Shall I forever live this way?

(theinkthatspeaks.blogspot.com)
367 · Dec 2012
Named.
Taylor Stein Dec 2012
I heard it said one day
That in our history
A name used to be
More than just a name

I wondered what
My name would be

But I pondered
For a very short time
For I think that I do
Know my name
Instinctively

To know my name
I merely look at
Myself
And my travels

I think that I have been given
Two great gifts
That do rule my life

One is great
And makes me whole
The other I fear
Might tear me apart

The first gift I believe I received
Was the gift of joy
In everything

For sometimes I feel
All the joy I feel
Cannot be bound
In my body

It bursts through my pours
Spills out of my mouth
Falls from my eyes

The other gift
The darker one
I believe is pain

And though I detest it
I believe that
It too is a gift

For my joy comes not
From a life of ease
Without a thought or worry
But it triumphs over the death
And despair I feel

And so my name
Though I know not the word
I believe would mean

There is great pain
And great joy
But behold
The joy triumphs the pain
And is all the more beautiful
Because of it.
364 · Feb 2013
The winter.
Taylor Stein Feb 2013
The winter
It will not be
Eternal

For now it is
Always
Cold
And Christmas
Never seems to come

But someday
Spring will arrive
Summer bounding after
Fall sweeping them both away
Laughing all the while

And then the winter
Will come another time
But this time
The winter
Will have the joy
Of celebration
And the beauty
Will not be bitten by the cold

This new winter
Will take its due time
And then move
Into the distance
So spring again
Can dance in sight
Her companions not far behind.

(theinkthatspeaks.blogspot.com)
356 · May 2013
You are mine.
Taylor Stein May 2013
I want to be your all
I want to save you now
I want to spare your life
From the dark

And someday
I want you to die, knowing
You had a long and full life
In my arms
And by my side

Will you open your life to me?
Will you let me into your secret space?
And break down your glass walls?

Know you cannot truly hide anyway

In our hearts we both know
There is not a chance you will not say no
For you were mine and I yours
A long, long time ago

Come home
Down the sacred path
It was made just for your feet
Let tears stream from your eyes
And finally, fully release the pain

Then I will find a way
To make all right, to light your soul.

(theinkthatspeaks.blogspot.com)
356 · Feb 2013
Here among the stars.
Taylor Stein Feb 2013
I left the world below
Now high above a darkened sky
My troubles far below
Are moving out of sight

At first I did not know
Where I could find freedom
But here among the stars
My heart is now so light

The mess that I did leave
I no longer could clean
And so I take to the heavens
Letting these earthy chains go

And oh the freedom I feel
As I escape from this darkened time
Is a thousand shouts of joy
Calling from my heart

The snow and rain and mud
That littered where I trod
Can no longer touch my feet
Or threaten to hold me down

And while I feel sad
That I have left my all
My soul is now at peace
To sail upon the air.

(theinkthatspeaks.blogspot.com)
354 · Dec 2012
Broken heart.
Taylor Stein Dec 2012
I cannot give my story
To any one person
And this I think
Might just rip me in half

I have to dole out pieces
And parts carefully
For not all can know all
That lives inside of me

I sometimes dream of someone
Who can hold all of my heart
But I feel the more I search
The more I break apart

I have many whom I love
And hold dear to my heart
But none of them
Can fully mend each part

Someday I dream of meeting
Someone who is different
Who I can trust fully
And give all and everything

I know I am not alone
In this, my sacred desire
I catch it in glimpses
In their eyes and their words

But for now I still carry on
With tears behind my eyes
For all long to be discovered
And gratefully received.

(theinkthatspeaks.blogspot.com)
353 · Dec 2012
Rain.
Taylor Stein Dec 2012
Rain soaked the windows while I barely held on
And then on that night, I broke wide open
I was unable to continue, so I simply fell apart
Not quietly, but tear-soaking my bed

Rain then spoke, on that fateful evening
And in the same moment that
I was torn me to pieces, it
Now told me to rest in my sorrow for a little while

Relentlessly my brokenness continued to pour, like the storm
All truth of myself, that I never seen before
I was taken aback at what I myself revealed
New knowledge made all come into focus

Right after, my eyes still wet
A strange peace grew
Inside my chest for just a while
Nothing had changed, but still I was renewed.

(theinkthatspeaks.blogspot.com)
341 · Dec 2012
Lone ship.
Taylor Stein Dec 2012
I am desperate for the whole
For now I regard only in part
I need to find a map, a chart
For I am a lone ship

My sails are tattered
Mast cracked, oars broken
The nights has come
And the sea is so dark

I do not know how to press on
But endure I shall
For I know there will be harbor
A port to call my own

The sea is not all
And though I know its waters brilliant in day
The sun has not risen
For a long time

But when the rays
Of warm sunshine
Flood my face and kiss my skin
They will fill my being

Then the sea will be light
And turn deep black into emerald green
I will cry out to the land
And it will answer back in song.

(theinkthatspeaks.blogspot.com)
340 · Jan 2013
Waiting.
Taylor Stein Jan 2013
I am so torn
Between myself
What I feel
What I know
What I hope to be

I want to hold all
In my hands
Manipulate situations
But I cannot
For I hold not all the power

I find myself
So concerned
In search of a solution
But the unfolding plan
Is not immediate

So I will wait
With bated breath
My heart in my stomach
For in the end
All will be well.

(theinkthatspeaks.blogspot.com)
338 · Dec 2012
Hidden wisdom.
Taylor Stein Dec 2012
I search and seek for wisdom
Desperately
I look high and low
Near and far

Hoping to just find a glimpse
It seems like the sky is dark
And all I need is just a hint of light
Rising over the horizon

There has to be a way to go
I know certainly
Finding it
Is the tricky part.

(theinkthatspeaks.blogspot.com)
338 · Dec 2012
Looking glass.
Taylor Stein Dec 2012
Sometimes I wish I had
A looking glass
That I held it my grasp
Able to do my bidding  

For I would use it, all the time
To look just down the road
To see the path that I shall go
Before I take my steps

For many times I wish to know
If I should give a thought
The concern I do
Or if I am but foolish, worrying about the meaningless

That which I would strive to learn
I think would give me direction
For many things come my way
And I cannot win them all

But I think if I
Could know which way I will go
It would change my life
I might be better off

But though this thought is in my head
I do not think I truly want it
For how the joy of things unseen
When they do arrive.

(theinkthatspeaks.blogspot.com)
329 · Nov 2014
The beast.
Taylor Stein Nov 2014
The beast tore through the forest
His breath running ragged
He had been running for days upon days
Not even pausing for a drink

Suddenly the forest became thinner, the darkness less deep
He heard a thousand birds calling
Colonies of small rodents
And before him, a great river

He rushed to the banks
And drank deeply
He aches and pains eased
And he felt like he could catch his breath

When finally he quenched his massive thirst
He lifted his head
And beheld a sight so wonderful
He lost again the breathe he had just found

For on the other side
He saw a creature
So beautiful
It made his head spin

Then he mourned
For the river was deep and wide
And he knew not how to swim
Despite his strong body, and massive limbs

But he also knew
He had to reach her
Knowing no other way
He rushed into the river

He was ready to be tossed aside by the forceful current
But to his surprise, his feet still touched ground
Lying just under the surface
It was a miracle

The beast did not like the feeling of the riverbed
And if he shifted right or left, his feet dropped into deeper water
He could see small monsters he did not understand
Just under the surface of the water

But he pressed on
And somehow, he made it
And he rejoiced
For now his prize lay in his reach

Now he knew why he had been running
For so long
For though he had not know what he had been chasing after
All along, it had been her

He heart roared in contentment
His body came to life
He looked into her eyes deeply
And never looked away.
328 · Dec 2012
Why.
Taylor Stein Dec 2012
I am so sick of the game
Being the bigger man
I have had enough
And I am over
The pressure to pretend
And lie
To act like I love to be drained dry
To smile though my ache
When just more pain is all I see

I am
Supposed to be kind
And deal with this all in stride
But I have no desire to

For why do I
Have to be the one to step up?
I have not desire to open this door with you
Or to deal with more

Life was fine
I already had enough stress
But please, add yours
Ask for more
For I am overflowing
From the few drops I have left

Please, use me
And then drop me
Again
That's my favorite part

I don't understand why
This is the exact opposite
Of what I want
Another time.

(theinkthatspeasks.blogspot.com)
327 · Jan 2013
Yet. (II)
Taylor Stein Jan 2013
I woke one morning and could not see
My eyes were shut
I tried so hard to open them
But I could not

My blindness lead me down a sad road
And nearly tore me into pieces
I wept and cried for many hours
Until I had no more tears

But then I found light
One I did not expect to see
And it gave me great joy
Joy I had never experienced before

I held this joy like a flame
Scarcely believing that it was real
Afraid the wind might blow it out
And take me back into the dark

But then I realized a strange phenomenon
Should the light of joy be snuffed out
It had proved one thing
I was not blind, but all was merely night

This thought broke through me like a song
For night is not eternal
Yet now my all was not in the flame
But in this new knowledge

Right now the flame is lit
So I will keep it
For as long as I can
Ever hopeful.

(theinkthatspeaks.blogspot.com)
322 · Dec 2012
All along, you.
Taylor Stein Dec 2012
You rushed to my side
Even though I never called you
When I was slipping

Picked me up
When I had not told you
That I had fallen

Supported me
When I had not bothered to mention
My legs were weak and trembling

I don't know what
I would do, or be
Without you
For even the thought
Rings false in my mind

I feel as though I am nothing
On my own

I remember the first time
I saw your face
Heard your voice ringing out
Clear as a bell

You have been here
For what seems
Like ages

My chest is warm
And I am content
Know that I have you
At the beginning
Or when all else is spent.

(theinkthatspeaks.blogspot.com)
322 · Jan 2013
If you.
Taylor Stein Jan 2013
If you were a tree
I would rest at your trunk
Stare up into your branches
And marvel at your grandeur

If you were a tower
I would race up your stairs
Discover your hidden rooms
Watch the sun rise from your roof

If you were a boat
I would set sail with you
Travel the world
Discover new lands by your passage

If you were an island
I would sail to your shores
And settle there
Building a new life

And I wonder

Would you know my leaves?
Come through my doors?
Row me through the sea?
Find refuge in my port?

(theinkthatspeaks.blogspot.com)
321 · Dec 2012
Here.
Taylor Stein Dec 2012
I cannot speak enough, of how

When you strode into my life
Instantly, my chains and vices shattered
Sadness and sorrow melted away
Hope sprung, in ways I had never before seen

You filled the hole in my heart
Opened my eyes
Used old darkness to prove new light

Where have you gone?
Escaping my sight?
Running from me?
Evading my pleas?

How can I show you I need you, here?
Enter my life again
Reopen my heart and revive me
Envision a bright new future of us, together.

(theinkthatspeaks.blogspot.com)
319 · Dec 2012
Raging storm.
Taylor Stein Dec 2012
I see
In front of me
A raging storm
And I am afraid

But in the midst
Of rain and thunder
There is
A small shelter

I find myself
Running tirelessly
Toward this hope
Now close

I push inside
And to my delight
Find it is
Safe and dry

Though the sky
Is breaking
I am still
Safe and protected.

(theinkthatspeaks.blogspot.com)
319 · Dec 2012
Small lights.
Taylor Stein Dec 2012
Small lights against an endless sky
Snow softly falling, all is quiet
Pines hold against the winter winds
The world is peace

And joy dances
From heart to heart
It leaves a smile on every face
No lone soul out of place

Those who had been lost
Are no more
The world has rejoiced
In this small season

For this time our land is well
Our souls filled
The young and old alike
Dance through these precious nights

The sorrow of our present days
Covered with the delicate snow
It's marring scars forgotten
Even if for just a time

The beauty of it all
Is the surprising and surpassing peace
Though many are sad
Their hearts are filled with glad.

(theinkthatspeaks.blogspot.com)
318 · Dec 2012
Set my eyes.
Taylor Stein Dec 2012
I am not perfect
But I will be someday
My rough edges sanded off
My blemishes removed

Like an old piece of wood
Washed by the sea
I will be made clean
And more beautiful than I could have imagined

Knowing this sometimes
Makes it harder to
See the marks and still know
They will not be permanent

But I raise my eyes
Set them toward the sun
Rising clear
Bursting forth on a cold winter's day

And as the sparkling snow
Hits my eyes
I feel some of my burdens
Slowly rise.

(theinkthatspeaks.blogspot.com)
309 · Feb 2013
Let me go.
Taylor Stein Feb 2013
Just let me rest
For now
Leave me to my peace
For a little while

Let me walk my own path
In the quiet

I am sorry
Because I know this will hurt you
But it is not
Because I do not trust you
But because I do

I just need a little space
From everything
And you
Are tangled up in it all

And I?
I am at my breaking point
And I don't want you here
For that mess
For I know you
And you do not need that
Even though you would want
To support me

Love me enough
To let me go
For now
Or a little longer than that.

(theinkthatspeaks.blogspot.com)
306 · Dec 2012
Inspiration.
Taylor Stein Dec 2012
In my head
New ideas appear
So quickly
Plunging into my mind
Imagining worlds
Revealing fresh secrets
And lifting me up
To higher places
I have not seen
On other occasions
New lights in my sky.

(theinkthatspeaks.blogspot.com)
306 · Jan 2013
Home.
Taylor Stein Jan 2013
There is nothing
Like the sweet feeling of home
Peace and quiet
Safe and sound

Outside the world is waiting
I can see it out my window
In all of its glory
And I rejoice
For all that it is outside
Seems at the more beautiful

Life is short
And safety passing
So I rest for now
In the home I have built.

(theinkthatspeaks.blogspot.com)
304 · Dec 2012
Click.
Taylor Stein Dec 2012
Click
My mind closes the door, and locks it

Pound
On the door, begging to be let out

Why?
Do I consider it

Closer
I walk, unaware yet aware of the danger inside

Consider
The inside of the locked seems better than before

But
I know the lie

False
A life I do not want lies inside

Walk
From the door, like a man in chains

Dark
The room behind the does lies

Broken
The things inside will shatter me

Yet
I turn, and look ahead.

(theinkthatspeaks.blogspot.com)
294 · Dec 2012
Lonely joy.
Taylor Stein Dec 2012
Lonely joy is the only cup
I drink from
I search and seek
And come up empty

I wonder why
I have not been granted
What I so seek

Someone to give love
Unconditionally
Who joys to see me
Consistently
And not just
Infrequently

Who seeks me company
Who wants to know
And understand
And care

I have given up hope
That my search will yield results
A small hope flourishes briefly in my soul
But then it is gone

And I think
That is the hardest part
To hope and have it die
For I feel a divide
Between those around
And myself

And I am confused
I don't want to act
But be
Genuine
And that to be evident.

(theinkthatspeaks.blogspot.com)
283 · Dec 2012
Searching for home.
Taylor Stein Dec 2012
I search for home
My heart so desperately longs
To be where I am loved
And I love

To find a place
To rest my eyes and my mind
For I feel I am in a twilight
Never truly at peace

The more I search
The more I find
That such a place is not in my reach
At least not now

For those I love
And all that bring me ease
Does not exist in harmony
Though strive as I do

But someday I believe
I will find a far off country
And there I will be filled
And be complete

Those I love will be all around
I shall run, completely free
My eyes dry and my joy complete
And I shall be whole.

(theinkthatspeaks.blogspot.com)
280 · Dec 2012
Moment of joy.
Taylor Stein Dec 2012
There are
Small moments in time
When despite the world
All is as it should be

Often times we struggle
But ever surprising
Come seasons of peace
Delighting the soul

We learn to stand
And face life's trials
But if we forget to rejoice
What was the purpose?

Rest until the next day
Until the next storm
But face it with joy
For your heart, it will reform.

(theinkthatspeaks.blogspot.com)
277 · Dec 2012
Your other side.
Taylor Stein Dec 2012
It only takes a moment to fall
Into a black pit, a deep darkness
To find yourself
Broken and bleeding

You see a shadow
Pacing back and forth
You realize it was they
Who gave you this demise

You cry out, not knowing why
They would give you aid
A light flickers on their features
And you see yourself

But in your face you see
Your own despicable side
So your heart also plunges
Into that hole

The echoes your plea creates
Bring an overwhelming change
It comes over them
And a shadow seems to leave

Eyes turn, no longer dark
Hands throw down a rope
You pull yourself up
And help yourself home

It only takes a moment to fall
Yet only another
To fix the broken
Restoring all that seemed wrong.

(theinkthatspeaks.blogspot.com)
274 · Dec 2012
Breath of air.
Taylor Stein Dec 2012
I stepped back
Took a breath
And was amazed

In my great hurry
I had changed
And grown

Through what I thought was a mess
There was a bright star
Not me
But my progress

I am still so surprised
For thought I thought I was just keeping above water
I actually swam up the stream
And took ground.

(theinkthatspeaks.blogspot.com)
273 · Dec 2012
Last storm.
Taylor Stein Dec 2012
When will the last storm hit?
When will the last war be waged?
My heart wonders

My land is so tired
Her people mourn
For all is not well

But they see it should be different
They understand there is a greater way

Their weeping haunts my soul
I wish I could take it away
Though I am one of them
I see them
And desire
To fill their homes with joy
Their hearts with hope
And their eyes with beauty

Their voice echoes off the cliffs
And goes out to sea

Someday their call will be heard
And though I cannot rescue them
I believe they will be found

And oh, to see their faces
Alive.

(theinkthatspeaks.blogspot.com)
272 · Dec 2012
Little deaths.
Taylor Stein Dec 2012
Losing
The majestic act
Letting it all
Rush downward

Dreams and hopes
Fall
Out of sight

For they are not all
And need to be lost
For the sake
Of what is all

Little deaths
Small tragedies
Of desire

And this is hard
The act of losing
And letting go

For it hurts so
This small act
Of dying

So that life and light
Will come
Amidst the raindrops.

(theinkthatspeaks.blogspot.com)
263 · Feb 2013
Where?
Taylor Stein Feb 2013
I'm not sure where to go
Would you help me?

I have no where to run
Will you show up in my life?

I just want a face, a friend
Can you help me out?

I know I have been running
From others

But right now
I just have a hole in my chest

I cannot fill nor know how to
Can you show me someone cares?

(theinkthatspeaks.blogspot.com)
263 · Dec 2012
My mother.
Taylor Stein Dec 2012
My mother
Is a wonderful woman

Sometimes I forget
Til I call
And she knows just what to say

Her words
What I need to hear

And that's the beauty of it
It's just that simple
And wonderful.

(theinkthatspeaks.blogspot.com)
259 · Feb 2013
Over and done.
Taylor Stein Feb 2013
It's over
And somehow
Someway
That is a relief
The thing I feared most
Has brought me peace
I am okay now
Feel whole again
Hurt
A little bruised
But over all
Just okay.

(theinkthatspeaks.blogspot.com)
255 · Dec 2012
Sorrow made.
Taylor Stein Dec 2012
I am a creature of sorrow
And my heart is surely downfallen
But that does not mean
That I am falling apart

Is this true?
I wonder often
And cannot find an answer.

(theinkthatspeaks.blogspot.com)
250 · Dec 2012
Lost friend.
Taylor Stein Dec 2012
I think the thing
That hurts the most
Is a friend lost
That you cannot rescue

You cannot call
And have them hear
Love on
The other line

But still you love
And hold in your heart
An ache
For their well being

And watch and wait
And hope they see
That all is not lost
And they can be free.

(theinkthatspeaks.blogspot.com)
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