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Mar 2015 · 558
Taylor Stein Mar 2015
I feel the pain too brother
In my bones, I feel it as you fall
Lash for lash and scar for scar
My head smashes down the stone steps
Crash for crash and drop of blood for drop of blood

But what runs between us, brother
Is more than those red splatters on the filthy ground
For you, time and time again
Have proved water is in fact thicker than blood
And bonds chosen closer than those of flesh

Water carries your pain to me, brother
Lost joy from palaces of princesses
And despair from dungeons of ******
New scars from those thought to be friends
And wounds from laughter of enemies

I hope when we and not just you brother, bear the load
Your bleeding stops a little sooner
Water cleaning and cleansing the wounds
I hope weight shouldered together
Will fight back stronger against all that is destroying you

And we, lash for lash and blow for blow
Will fall twice on the murderous brows against you
Bound by water, our mighty weapon
For when you fall, we fall together
Because you've taught me brother when I fall, you will too.
Nov 2014 · 734
Taylor Stein Nov 2014
You know
I'm not quite sure
About the love of princesses
Satin gowns and evening *****

I've dreamed of it all for so long
I'm not sure I believe it anymore
Because all I found in the arms of a woman
Is hurt, heartache, and sorrow

But I have found the love of a brother
Is richer than a thousand kings
The arm of a friend
Stronger than a thousand warriors

It seems so strange
For we chase and we chase
Happy endings, summer love, and romantic kisses
And value love above all other ends

And love is higher
It overcomes all
Gives strength like no other
And is in itself an end

But what I am starting to believe
Beginning to find
Is we are wrong
About what kind of love we really, truly need.
Nov 2014 · 333
Home/late night thoughts.
Taylor Stein Nov 2014
I am looking for greatest love
Longing for true home, rest
Searching on and on for peace of heart

I want to find myself covered, sheltered
No longer exposed and vulnerable
But finding that my weeping has passed on

Joy, no longer a mere cover for sorrow
But an unfurling expression
Of who I am, what I have become.
Nov 2014 · 270
The beast.
Taylor Stein Nov 2014
The beast tore through the forest
His breath running ragged
He had been running for days upon days
Not even pausing for a drink

Suddenly the forest became thinner, the darkness less deep
He heard a thousand birds calling
Colonies of small rodents
And before him, a great river

He rushed to the banks
And drank deeply
He aches and pains eased
And he felt like he could catch his breath

When finally he quenched his massive thirst
He lifted his head
And beheld a sight so wonderful
He lost again the breathe he had just found

For on the other side
He saw a creature
So beautiful
It made his head spin

Then he mourned
For the river was deep and wide
And he knew not how to swim
Despite his strong body, and massive limbs

But he also knew
He had to reach her
Knowing no other way
He rushed into the river

He was ready to be tossed aside by the forceful current
But to his surprise, his feet still touched ground
Lying just under the surface
It was a miracle

The beast did not like the feeling of the riverbed
And if he shifted right or left, his feet dropped into deeper water
He could see small monsters he did not understand
Just under the surface of the water

But he pressed on
And somehow, he made it
And he rejoiced
For now his prize lay in his reach

Now he knew why he had been running
For so long
For though he had not know what he had been chasing after
All along, it had been her

He heart roared in contentment
His body came to life
He looked into her eyes deeply
And never looked away.
Nov 2014 · 580
Quiet love.
Taylor Stein Nov 2014
I used to think love was all in the dramatic
Life films made from memories found in the attic

But now I'm not so sure
And I'm hoping that means I'm just more mature

I don't want to lose the allure of love
But I also wanted to see it in reality, not just from above

Love can sometimes be screaming matches and passionate kisses
Running, hunting for each other like the church for Salem witches

But now I'm finding what I want most
Is quiet afternoons, long bike rides, and morning toast

For I've had enough drama to last a lifetime
And I haven't been on this earth for a long time.
May 2013 · 301
You are mine.
Taylor Stein May 2013
I want to be your all
I want to save you now
I want to spare your life
From the dark

And someday
I want you to die, knowing
You had a long and full life
In my arms
And by my side

Will you open your life to me?
Will you let me into your secret space?
And break down your glass walls?

Know you cannot truly hide anyway

In our hearts we both know
There is not a chance you will not say no
For you were mine and I yours
A long, long time ago

Come home
Down the sacred path
It was made just for your feet
Let tears stream from your eyes
And finally, fully release the pain

Then I will find a way
To make all right, to light your soul.

Apr 2013 · 718
Falling in love.
Taylor Stein Apr 2013
The laughter of a friend is sweeter than the purest sugar
The comfort of brother cannot be measured in price

I have fallen in love with those around me
I never saw it coming
Not the love of secret whispers or stolen kisses
But love all the same

I want to fall in that other kind of love someday
With a woman who causes my heart to skip a beat
Every time she walks past

Before I find on myself bended knee
Or have to share my bed
Before my happy endings and ride off into the sunset
I want to fall in love everyday
With everything

I want to fall in love with the way the morning sun hits the trees
Every morning on the way to my busy life.

Taylor Stein Apr 2013
We are
The How I Met Your Mother Generation
Like it or not
We are

We are all
Chasing a yellow umbrella
That will lead us to a new beginning

For in our lonely lives
We are constantly searching and seeking
For those warm arms clasping that blessed shelter from the storm
Hoping it will spare us from the rain in our own lives
Wishing that then
It will finally all make sense

The sad part is
That heart is not the end
And our tears will still flow

We know our lives are not all that they should be
You can see it in our eyes
Hear it in our voices
But what can we do?
So we chase after the One
Hoping they will bring us new life

It's sad in one way
For we are not made of some mysterious person, future lover
But in another way
It brings hope
For we have learned
That we cannot acquire and buy our way to completeness.

Apr 2013 · 389
Taylor Stein Apr 2013
I am running
From you to them
And back again
Sorry I am
But running all the same

For I am too filled with fear
To let myself close
I tend to get hurt

And this is just as much
My own fault
As it is yours

My expectations are vast mountains
To which you cannot even begin to measure up to
And I recognize this

But it also can be you
Who rips my heart, apart

I found myself so dark and bitter
For I was trying
To find everything I am in you

So let me quickly race
Pausing only momentarily
With those I love
For they are many

But mostly, I am trying to protect myself.

Mar 2013 · 706
Taylor Stein Mar 2013
We pursue happiness constantly
Bliss more desired than gold

But we are merely chasing a daydream
To a place that here does not exist

We also have a higher calling
We were made for more

To stand and fight for truth and justice
And born to mourn all is not well

For the devastation all around
Should not go unnoticed

This blindness would mock the majestic earth
For beauty is shattered, merely a shadow

So let us weep at all is broken
For we were not made merely to laugh

But also to know there is more.

Feb 2013 · 357
Taylor Stein Feb 2013
Lonely and alone again
He weeps and wonders
His low voice just more than a whisper, murmurers out

Does anyone else want to be loved so badly?
Do I alone hurt so deeply and not know why?
Will anyone else ever find me?

He feels so sad and so foolish
But all he wants is someone to come into his life
To really love him, and want him around

For all his life he has loved more than he has been loved
And it hurts like hell
And he doesn't know what to do

He has tried to play it down
And pretend like it doesn't bother him
But it cuts him deep

He sometimes thinks he may not be alone
But it is so hard to tell
And he is afraid to ask

He worries if he tells people how much he wants love
That they will all run away
In fear that he might consume them

Lately it has gotten worse
And he doesn't know what to do anymore
He screams, he cries, he falls apart

How many times can I fall apart before it is all over?
Does anyone else understand?
Is anyone else as desperate as I?

Feb 2013 · 531
Time and myself.
Taylor Stein Feb 2013
I often feel that time is ever my foe
For it continues to steal everyone one I love
And only allows them into my life
For moments that seem much too fleeting

But time does not stop, instead a two-edged sword
For my days of sorrow and moments of regret
Time seems to make them more
Turning mere seconds into what seems like eternity

And as the days of joy pass, running from my eyes
The deepest love departing before I can rest
My soul tears, for I cannot regain what is lost
I constantly struggle for the most of every moment

But should I suddenly be able to conquer time's speed
I do not believe that this would be wise
For the bitter and sweet moments of this short life
Seem all the more beautiful in their haste.

Feb 2013 · 557
City lights and chaos.
Taylor Stein Feb 2013
Up among the eaves and rooftops
I am searching
I am seeking
But I have yet to find

My eyes wander
Hoping to discover a rhyme or reason
In this constant turmoil and disarray
This is my one desire

Though my search has been fruitless, I wait
For in all the confusion and chaos
I am certain
There is an overarching blueprint, a master plan

I rest, and then stand tall
Looking out at the bright city lights
A mess of colors and sounds
All coming together into one.

Feb 2013 · 377
My heart's song.
Taylor Stein Feb 2013
For many years I have heard my heart
It sings a song
A quiet one
That is beautiful
And yet haunts me

This wordless melody that it sings
Is so breathtaking
It brings my eyes to tears
For my heart
Longs for so very much more

My heart I have found
Has not learned
To let go
Of its desire for perfection
At least
It has not yet

I have spoken to my heart
And told it
Its goals are much too lofty
My heart ignores me
And continues to dream
As if it had not heard me

Waiting for a miracle
For so long
My heart alone
Traverses on
And I have not the will to stop
This ever-present hymn.

Feb 2013 · 308
Here among the stars.
Taylor Stein Feb 2013
I left the world below
Now high above a darkened sky
My troubles far below
Are moving out of sight

At first I did not know
Where I could find freedom
But here among the stars
My heart is now so light

The mess that I did leave
I no longer could clean
And so I take to the heavens
Letting these earthy chains go

And oh the freedom I feel
As I escape from this darkened time
Is a thousand shouts of joy
Calling from my heart

The snow and rain and mud
That littered where I trod
Can no longer touch my feet
Or threaten to hold me down

And while I feel sad
That I have left my all
My soul is now at peace
To sail upon the air.

Feb 2013 · 717
Locked door.
Taylor Stein Feb 2013
I tried to open the door to your heart
But you held it shut
And I do not know quite why you did
Which hurts

I wanted to peer inside you
Enter into your life and give you aid
Win you over and show you all was well
Make at least some sort of difference

But right now
It seems that I will not be

I hope it was not selfish
My desire to help you out
Though sometimes I fear it was
But still, I am not sure

I do not wish to again
Smash myself upon the rocks of repentance
Unless I need to

I know this for sure
That in my heart I hope, I desire
That I wanted this for you

So for now I will love
In whatever way I can
From outside the door I will show you I care
For you
Not just for me.

Feb 2013 · 313
The winter.
Taylor Stein Feb 2013
The winter
It will not be

For now it is
And Christmas
Never seems to come

But someday
Spring will arrive
Summer bounding after
Fall sweeping them both away
Laughing all the while

And then the winter
Will come another time
But this time
The winter
Will have the joy
Of celebration
And the beauty
Will not be bitten by the cold

This new winter
Will take its due time
And then move
Into the distance
So spring again
Can dance in sight
Her companions not far behind.

Feb 2013 · 1.1k
Taylor Stein Feb 2013
I am losing
You are winning

I am faltering
You are conquering

I am speechless
And you have the right words

I am not strong
You have no weakness

I need someone like you
In my life

And be here
With me

Feb 2013 · 388
Taylor Stein Feb 2013
Denial lingered
Like an old friend
Unwilling to go

Then anger came
Storming in
And ripping apart my soul

Bargaining then arrived
For it bore a painful price

Depression I fear
Is setting in
And permeating my soul

Acceptance is a flighty bird
I have yet to catch
But when I do, what then?

Feb 2013 · 1.3k
Taylor Stein Feb 2013
I am hurting
And I know I should pick myself up
But I have not the strength
Not even a little bit
Please come and save me
For I am broken.

Feb 2013 · 214
Taylor Stein Feb 2013
I'm not sure where to go
Would you help me?

I have no where to run
Will you show up in my life?

I just want a face, a friend
Can you help me out?

I know I have been running
From others

But right now
I just have a hole in my chest

I cannot fill nor know how to
Can you show me someone cares?

Feb 2013 · 270
Let me go.
Taylor Stein Feb 2013
Just let me rest
For now
Leave me to my peace
For a little while

Let me walk my own path
In the quiet

I am sorry
Because I know this will hurt you
But it is not
Because I do not trust you
But because I do

I just need a little space
From everything
And you
Are tangled up in it all

And I?
I am at my breaking point
And I don't want you here
For that mess
For I know you
And you do not need that
Even though you would want
To support me

Love me enough
To let me go
For now
Or a little longer than that.

Feb 2013 · 594
It hurt.
Taylor Stein Feb 2013
It hurt like hell
When I walked away
But I am glad it was me
And not you

For if it was you
It would have killed me
For sure.

Feb 2013 · 224
Over and done.
Taylor Stein Feb 2013
It's over
And somehow
That is a relief
The thing I feared most
Has brought me peace
I am okay now
Feel whole again
A little bruised
But over all
Just okay.

Feb 2013 · 424
Weeping willow.
Taylor Stein Feb 2013
In an open field
For ages upon ages
Against the winds of life
There stood a lone tree
That had stood tall
A weeping willow

A tribute to sorrow and sadness
An enduring figure entrenched in mourning
Under the open sky

And so the willow wept
Mourning for the broken earth
Crying many tears for the land
It stood in for all of its life

The sorrow it felt
Was so deep
That though the willow could not see nor speak nor hear
It still knew of this great travesty

Then at last the thunder came
And rolled in with the mighty power
Pouring rain on the earth
Rain that cleansed
It washed away the *****
And made all clean

The earth was no longer broken
The skies had split in two
And the world was new

Yet still the willow wept
But now
Now for joy.

Feb 2013 · 458
Broken and furious.
Taylor Stein Feb 2013
Your words fall so quickly
And I feel so alone
I do not want to admit there is
Something wrong
But I, I am furious

I have tried a thousand times
And you, you have made me feel foolish
I have tried to play it down
Let it go
But no more

My mind wrenches in pain
I have followed you
Built you high
And now

Another came and sought me out
Asked for my advice
They opened up
Showed love to me
Something you do no more
And never much before
If at all

I feel so wounded by your lack
Of care, of love
For scarce I feel that I have been
The object of your pursuit
And only an inconvenience

I hurt so much
And all the time
You know this, and know it full well
But now again you let me down
And leave me alone
So I can barely stand

I have tried a thousand times to stand alone
I cannot
And will not

I often feel that I have been
Used and then abused
Not with words, or deeds
But with your callousness

So fine
I scream
Just have your way
Toss me aside, again
Shown me how you've grown to be
A man of carelessness

Now my heart feels warm
For in this new light of what I have long held inside
I have found a path to a new place
Where maybe someday, someone might know my name
But it now again it beats fear
That I shall be crushed should I rise again

Grief and sorrow
Sadness and sickness

A poor beggar in the mud
I feel I am
And as time does pass
My heart only beats a quiet thud.

Jan 2013 · 367
Face the winter.
Taylor Stein Jan 2013
Face the winter
Or it will consume you

Face the winter
Or you will surely falter

I woke one morning
And found the morning's dawn
With icy fingers
Had reached down and grasped my world

Face the winter
Though it freezes your face
And whitens your hair

Face the winter
Though the winds nearly blow you over
And you can only stagger

I tried to ignore the winter
And live in a dream world
Of spring, summer, and clear blue skies
But in my heart I knew it was a lie

Face the winter
Or it will destroy you

Face the winter
And you shall stand strong.

Jan 2013 · 272
Taylor Stein Jan 2013
There is nothing
Like the sweet feeling of home
Peace and quiet
Safe and sound

Outside the world is waiting
I can see it out my window
In all of its glory
And I rejoice
For all that it is outside
Seems at the more beautiful

Life is short
And safety passing
So I rest for now
In the home I have built.

Jan 2013 · 278
If you.
Taylor Stein Jan 2013
If you were a tree
I would rest at your trunk
Stare up into your branches
And marvel at your grandeur

If you were a tower
I would race up your stairs
Discover your hidden rooms
Watch the sun rise from your roof

If you were a boat
I would set sail with you
Travel the world
Discover new lands by your passage

If you were an island
I would sail to your shores
And settle there
Building a new life

And I wonder

Would you know my leaves?
Come through my doors?
Row me through the sea?
Find refuge in my port?

Jan 2013 · 393
Defining moments.
Taylor Stein Jan 2013
Lying in my bed, my mind begins to stir
Glowing lamplights of reminiscence

I can still remember all the moments
In my life
That defined me
Shaped my being

I still can picture them
And I treasure them
Bright jewels in the dust
Not all good, still none bad

I can still see the lights shining, thoughts rushing
Through my head

I wish you were with me
I'm falling apart
I love you, even after what you did.

Jan 2013 · 527
Here. (II)
Taylor Stein Jan 2013
I cannot speak enough of how

When you strode into my life
Instantly, my chains and vices shattered
You taught me how to stand unbound
And healed my many scars

My new strength let me
Prevail against all that before had felled me
Unimaginable was the change you brought

But I still feel pain, still struggle
New trials still pierce my heart

I thought that if I shed my old scars
That I would feel less pain
And walk though the world, unharmed
But you have revealed
My heart is ever open, exposed

This new hurt shall again become my strength
But for now

I long for you to be here.

Jan 2013 · 337
Come with me.
Taylor Stein Jan 2013
Come with me
To home you've never entered
Grief and pain
Will swiftly be washed away
Joy and gladness here
My love will take you
And you'll see
You're now in a new day

Come with me
My darling, my beloved
And now we
Will live together always
Leave behind
Everything that plagues you
From now on
Only ever be free

Come with me
And learn to sing a new song
Learn to fly
On higher, fairer wings
And you shall find
You are now like the sparrows
Soaring high, above
And ever free

And many years will pass in this new haven
You shall rest like you have never before
And your shall look back upon your sorrows
And see that they are as just a dream.

Jan 2013 · 345
The turn or rise.
Taylor Stein Jan 2013
Do new beginnings last?
Do triumphant battles always start in the upper hand?
Are heroes born from on high?

Or is it the opposite?

Do flash beginnings end more swiftly?
Do battles overturn in a moment?
Are heroes made to stumble?

With these questions
I face a new day
A sun rising
Pink and orange bursting above the horizon

My heart is new
My mind clear
But I do not know
Nor can I see
The end

But this, my peace and rest
That I know
All I do
I do not in vain

And so whether I rise or fall
Live or die
None is without purpose.

Jan 2013 · 2.7k
Taylor Stein Jan 2013
Chaos echoes all around me
And I hear the nations raging as they fall
Still my hands are steady
Still my heart is sure

I should be shaking as the world crumbles
I should be ready to stumble
For it seems inevitable
But for now, I do not fall

And this is a great wonder, so surprising
Running through me in untold ways
I have been made strong
And as bold as a lion

So I strive to use my new strength
Though unsure
What caused it to come
Or what gives it the will to continue.

Jan 2013 · 636
Breaking free.
Taylor Stein Jan 2013
I am a ship
That has been iced in to arctic chains
For many years
Cold and blowing winds have frosted my sails
And encased my keel
For countless decades

But this long winter
Dark and dreary, with no time for Christmas
Has begun to become spring
Even though the first time I felt warm breezes
I was convinced
It was a deception

Despite every latent chill
When I lose my faith
These mild, lengthening days
I cannot deny
Nor disregard
The dawn breaking forth

My mast and bow are thawing
My hull starting to shift
The ice and snow falling into the sea
Now just chilling water
But no longer an icebound prison

I cannot wait for the day
When the last ice melts from my decks
And I can set sail on the open water
To voyage new seas, fresh tides
No longer just avoiding
A frost-bitten demise, threatening to lead me to my grave

These warm days
Have broken into my cabin
My maps and charts now colored
With budding trees, birdsong, and warm water
For someday, I do not doubt
I shall sail free, unbound in pleasant wind.

Jan 2013 · 624
Taylor Stein Jan 2013
I need words
And not empty phrases
To convey
What my stumbling mouth cannot

To show love
And not forth hatred
In words that tell truth
That is difficult
To receive

I do not have these words
And hope they will
Be poured into my mind.

Jan 2013 · 318
Taylor Stein Jan 2013
I am so torn
Between myself
What I feel
What I know
What I hope to be

I want to hold all
In my hands
Manipulate situations
But I cannot
For I hold not all the power

I find myself
So concerned
In search of a solution
But the unfolding plan
Is not immediate

So I will wait
With bated breath
My heart in my stomach
For in the end
All will be well.

Jan 2013 · 509
Behold, wait, wonder, rise.
Taylor Stein Jan 2013
There is a great darkness
But behold
The light of day does come
It will shatter the night

There is a great pain
But wait
Relief will flow freely
And overwhelm the sorrow

There is a great fear
But wonder
Joy will rain like a storm
It will cover over the terror

There is a great *******
But rise
Chains will fall away
And restore the dejected.

Taylor Stein Jan 2013
I woke one morning and could not see
My eyes were shut
I wept and waited for my sight
I now do live in darkness, and cannot bring light
I’m blind and lost
But I won't always be

I stood up, fought for healing
In my weakness
My mind raged, my spirit woke
How can I?
I am angry at my failure
Will this poor traveler take any ground?

I tried to scale a mountain today
In chains
The locks stood open, keys inside
But I could not take them off
I slipped and fell
One day, I will make it to the top

I tried to sail away tonight
I had no map
The sails unfurled in the steady wind
Yet all my rowing did not take me far
My arms faltered
Some tomorrow I will succeed, and race from this lonely port

Challenged on every side, hoping in a single glimmer of light
Trust no one. Yet
The few and the bold, slide their way past my gates of steel
Desperate surrender is all I have
I toss and turn
Waiting for freedom.

Jan 2013 · 470
Yet. (Anew)
Taylor Stein Jan 2013
I woke one morning and could not see
My eyes were shut
I tried so hard to open them, but I was unable
I wept and waited for my sight
I now do live in darkness and cannot bring light
I’m blind and lost, but I won't always be

I rose and tried to fight my demons
But I was weak, so I faltered
My spirit broke and my eyes filled with tears
This defeat was too much
I am dejected at my failure, for I cannot be victorious
But someday I will conquer

I tried to scale a mountain, despite my chains
I never thought to take them off
The locks stood open with the keys inside
But I could not be free even if I had tried
I slipped and fell, my body crumbled
But I know one day I will make it to the summit

I tried to sail away, but had no map
My sails filled in the blowing wind
Yet all my rowing did not take me far
My arms faltered, and I broke apart
Some tomorrow I will succeed
Uninhibited, I will race from this lonely port.

Jan 2013 · 442
Yet. (III)
Taylor Stein Jan 2013
I woke one morning and could not see
My eyes were shut
Then to my astonishment
My sight came rushing back, surprising my hopeless life

For a moment in time, after my new outlook
Darkness came back
And I was much afraid
That it had returned, forever to bind me again

This burning question
Then possessed me
Can those in darkness truly come to light
If they still have flashes of their night?

I turned this over and over
Finally concluding they could
For Stockholm Syndrome
Is a reality

Those who live in darkness
For so long, are bound
To be shortly plunged back, inconsistently
Though they are free

I then realized
My fear in this troubling return
Had only existed for a time so short
And that I need not be afraid

For this is the cunning of the darkness
To make minutes, days
And hours, centuries
To twist the mind in an effort for control

For the darkness runs in deep rivers of the heart
And when light overwhelms
It is not eager to relent
But reluctant to loosen its grasp.

Jan 2013 · 294
Yet. (II)
Taylor Stein Jan 2013
I woke one morning and could not see
My eyes were shut
I tried so hard to open them
But I could not

My blindness lead me down a sad road
And nearly tore me into pieces
I wept and cried for many hours
Until I had no more tears

But then I found light
One I did not expect to see
And it gave me great joy
Joy I had never experienced before

I held this joy like a flame
Scarcely believing that it was real
Afraid the wind might blow it out
And take me back into the dark

But then I realized a strange phenomenon
Should the light of joy be snuffed out
It had proved one thing
I was not blind, but all was merely night

This thought broke through me like a song
For night is not eternal
Yet now my all was not in the flame
But in this new knowledge

Right now the flame is lit
So I will keep it
For as long as I can
Ever hopeful.

Jan 2013 · 357
Another's heart.
Taylor Stein Jan 2013
Just now, I saw another's heart
Open fully, and exposed
Ripped in two
Down my spirits came
And I could barely keep together
Night had come

For what I saw
Troubled me so
It broke my own heart
For someone I claim to love so
Is lost, alone

I did not know what to do
To mend their many woes
For I am just another
Just as shattered
And broken

There was no solution
No ultimate end
That I could carry them too
For the world is full
Of dark trials and enduring sorrow

So I hold them in my heart
And wish for their world to brighten
I hope
A flickering flame
That someday

Somehow, someway
They will be rescued
The time of their night run out
And a new dawn will
Into their life.

Jan 2013 · 579
Taylor Stein Jan 2013
What I do
I do not for the end
But for the journey
And the wisdom

Sometimes it's hard
When I feel that I have failed
But I must remember
I have not
If I have learned my lesson

Others think me strange
And hold their trophies

I have no prizes
Simply kind words
Spoken to me

In the end
The honor shall fade
But the wisdom
Will endure.

Jan 2013 · 466
Taylor Stein Jan 2013
I was utterly broken
Unconscious on the floor
Broken bottles all around me
Lying in a dark room
The last bulb smashed out
And shattered in a million pieces beside me
I was hopeless

But then you came into my dark room
Walked through the broken glass
And picked me up
Though I had not sought you out
You found me
With strong arms
You carried me out of a labyrinth of lies
My stone cold prison cell

You carried me into a place without walls
Fresh winds blowing
Set me down gently under the open sky
For the first time, in a long time

I came to slowly
Not knowing at first I had been rescued
For I had not the will to open my eyes
While I thought I was still bound
But you spoke truth to my battered mind
Started to bandage my wounds
And ever so slowly, I started to see

When at last I had the strength to stand
I walked over to the room
That had bound me captive
And looked inside
For a moment, I was afraid
That I was back and rebound

But then you touched me
And I saw that I was only
Standing in the doorway
And the iron chains that once held me captive
Were no more, now only a memory

You showed me a new way to live
And as the wounds on my body healed
You helped to release my mind from captivity
You showed me that the past was gone
And I was new

You handed me new weapons
And trained me for the next fight
But did not ****** me into battle
Until I had time heal
Under the open sky.

Dec 2012 · 254
Moment of joy.
Taylor Stein Dec 2012
There are
Small moments in time
When despite the world
All is as it should be

Often times we struggle
But ever surprising
Come seasons of peace
Delighting the soul

We learn to stand
And face life's trials
But if we forget to rejoice
What was the purpose?

Rest until the next day
Until the next storm
But face it with joy
For your heart, it will reform.

Dec 2012 · 623
Breaking in, to reality.
Taylor Stein Dec 2012
One winter day
I felt my skin grow cold again
Against the old, familiar wind
So I prepared to descend
Into the dark and dreary street
I had taken so many times before

But this time
I was wrong

For though I turned toward the alley that led
Me always into my sadness
I found that I could not go far
The block had become impassable
By strength not my own
And this, was to my great surprise

Many times had I dreamed
That I would be unable
To wander down the dark lane
But for many years I had
Been disappointed

But now to find, the alley closed
I felt an enduring heat
Not a bright hot flame that often leaves
But a burning ember, steady

I do not know how long the passage
Will be blocked and impassable
But for now glad am I
The dream I dreamt, for time unmeasured
Has broken into reality.

Dec 2012 · 282
All along, you.
Taylor Stein Dec 2012
You rushed to my side
Even though I never called you
When I was slipping

Picked me up
When I had not told you
That I had fallen

Supported me
When I had not bothered to mention
My legs were weak and trembling

I don't know what
I would do, or be
Without you
For even the thought
Rings false in my mind

I feel as though I am nothing
On my own

I remember the first time
I saw your face
Heard your voice ringing out
Clear as a bell

You have been here
For what seems
Like ages

My chest is warm
And I am content
Know that I have you
At the beginning
Or when all else is spent.

Dec 2012 · 376
Never grow old.
Taylor Stein Dec 2012
Some day, all die
But not all need
To grow old
Not in years, but in desire to shine
For old is not a number, but a lack of luster

Strive against losing the taste for life we presently hold
But still without fear of what comes next
For it
Must surely be
Another great adventure

But here
And now
The greatest dark thought we might employ
Is to one day lose all of our joy
And all that matters

The grandeur of the sky after a rain
Tied like a package, with a bow
The desire
To live loudly
Running, jumping, and lingering
To let ourselves run free

The frightening idea
Of losing hold of who we are
Our guiding lights, northern stars
To forget what we most enjoy
For small comforts of little true value
And endless pursuits not worth the gain

So we shall laugh much much too loud
Raise our voices above the crowd
Love vastly beyond reason
Open our hearts time and time again
So they do not close.

Dec 2012 · 266
Taylor Stein Dec 2012
In my head
New ideas appear
So quickly
Plunging into my mind
Imagining worlds
Revealing fresh secrets
And lifting me up
To higher places
I have not seen
On other occasions
New lights in my sky.

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