anesthesia
and opioid dreams
rolled-up smokes
and guitar strings*
with rotting mind
and rotting teeth
I'm losing weight
I'm losing sleep
cut me open
sew me up
the pain I feel
is not enough
give me something
more to feel
try to persuade me
this is real
I've spent so much
time on my own
that I'm afraid
it's left me cold
I'm a monster
so I'm told
my loyalties are
bought and sold
look in the mirror
I'm repulsed
I check my wrist
can't find a pulse
this corpse I wear
is just a shell
that keeps me locked
inside this hell
with runny nose
and bloodshot eyes
I sit alone
and wait to die
but it seems death
will never come
*or have I already
succumbed?
